Shooting Interrupts Shopping!!! Panic among white people who want violence to stay in its proper place (i.e. minority communities)!!!

This town fucking disgusts me.

For a longer time than I want to admit I've linked one crime story after the next . . . Murders, rapes, drive by shootings BUT rarely do the reports of violence in the media get much of a response.

Earlier this month a 2 year-old girl was killed in a drive-by shooting and the story didn't stay in the news for more than a half-a-day.

A little more than a week ago, a double homicide didn't raise an eyebrow among media watchers. The same can be said for most (if not all) of the murders on the Eastside.

But, predictably . . . When violence finally (inevitably) reaches out, into a part of town that isn't perceived to be "deserving" of a death toll . . . Then this whole city comes to a halt.

All of the preliminary reports are in and only a few details and (the always unsatisfying) motive are left to be discovered. On Sunday, a gunman killed two people in the Target store parking lot of the Ward Parkway Shopping Center. The perpetrator in the shooting is also implicated in a South KC homicide of a 67 year-old woman along with shooting a KCPD officer in the arm when he was stopped driving the aforementioned woman's car that was reported stolen. The alleged perpetrator was later killed by the police who confronted the man inside the Target store where two more people were injured in the melee.

So . . . All total . . . 4 people might have been killed directly related to this incident with another 2 injured . . . And I don't want to belittle anyone's suffering here but this sounds like a pretty average Summer weekend on the Eastside yet somehow the same body count never rates all of the panicked faces and LIVE, LATE BREAKING COVERAGE that KC's mall shooting garnered.

And the reason is clear, everybody knows, it doesn't need to be whitewashed and it underlies every assumption media watchers have about tuning into this story: What's clear from the overzealous coverage of the so-called "rampage" is that nobody cares when murders happen in low income neighborhoods, among po'folk or even worse among brown po'folk. It just doesn't rank as news and it's rarely this town's top story.

Even funnier . . . In the back of everyone's mind is a vague connection to the Virginia Tech massacre . . . And while this unfortunate shooting may prove that "Kansas Citians Can Be Just As Crazy As Everyone Else" It's certainly not a national tragedy even if the story did make the news on the BBC in between reports on whatever the Royal brat bastards are up to . . . But I digress.

If only for a second this recent KC shooting might bring arguments about gun control to the table. The day's events inspired a local blogger to proclaim: "I think we should limit gun ownership to one narrowly defined hunting rifle per adult and round up and confiscate everything else." And while that's a nice sentiment, I think I'd feel safer knowing that everybody else turned in their guns before me if that plan were to go into action.

Still, I don't think this issue is really about gun control or high minded ideals about who should have weapons given that this country has spent BILLIONS arming so many foreign nations and their children:



Additionally, no one can say violence shocks media watchers anymore given the level of carnage that the average American citizen can ignore coming from Iraq.



Or the violence Americans seemingly endorse when it's to benefit U.S. interests or those of allies who have little regard for the lives of faraway brown children.



Still, the media blitz regarding the Ward Parkway Shootings and the frenzy that it inspired seems to be nothing more than the same topic that I thought was thoroughly covered after 9/11 . . .



But yet again, the question remains the same: Do you have a right to feel safe in a world/city filled with so much suffering?

Your mileage may vary but I've already made note of the many murders in this town that went overlooked because they didn't hit the white community where they live.

And always, always it strikes me as funny that so many Plaza protesters carry signs for peace and/or justice (ugh) when that concept doesn't really exist merely a few blocks to the East no matter what the outcome of the hopeless cause they're fighting for on the other side of the planet.

3 people dead in a mall shooting won't come close to the inevitable death toll this City will rack up when it comes to young, Black males this summer but that issue didn't even merit more than passing mention during the last mayoral election . . . Truly, more people were interested in potholes or TIFs (especially most of the worthless local political bloggers) rather than anything having to do with what is tantamount to a yearly killing spree in Kansas City.

And now I have to stop because I'm being too cynical . . . Certainly there were bright spots in this tragedy . . . For instance, a local blogger managed to buy some pants in the middle of this thing and once and for all prove that men are better than women at everything (including shopping).

Additionally, talking on a cell phone and drinking overpriced coffee makes Beth Gottstein a hero!!!!!! Really, KC's worst public speaker on the "new" City Council proved that she's willing to listen to her constituents take gunfire over the phone . . . Check it:

Kansas City Councilwoman-elect Beth Gottstein also was at the Starbucks with friends. She had stepped out just before the shooting started. She and other customers were able to get away from the building, but a few of Gottstein’s friends were trapped in the coffee shop. She stayed in contact with them by cell phone throughout the ordeal.

“I was more fearful for the people around me,” Gottstein said.

Really, heroes were everywhere and even Sharon Sanders Brooks, another incoming councilwoman, was trapped in the TJ Maxx but still bravely proved that nothing could stop her from buying nice, new, plus sized clothes!!! Now that's leadership.

Anyway, I guess I shouldn't be surprised how this town (over)reacts to a few killings that are on a different side of Troost for a change.

Nobody likes the real world ruining a beautiful Sunday afternoon. Maybe putting a tragedy in perspective is too painful. Take a close enough look at how quickly life can come to an end and it's easy to realize that we don't need to look far for signs of our impending doom. The clock is already ticking. It's pointless to look for death on the end of a candlestick, to go searching for something that has already found us.

Kendall Just Because

Kendall Summers if my favorite model in the Kansas City area right now. She recently put up some new photos on her web page that I'm "enjoying" and have inspired me this morning. Additionally, because I'm a Latino with a well developed sleazy side . . . The fact that she lists her favorite foods as "Mexican and chocolate" will probably make my mind wander for the rest of the day.

The TKC Saturday Night Podcast: Payoffs and other forms of prostitution

I guess this week's podcast is dedicated to payoffs . . . Just to note the truth about what I'm thinking, I guess I'm still really peeved about that Skaggs appointment and even further disappointed that few Funkhouser cheerleaders on the Internets will take note of it giving his clever timing on the topic.

But payoffs are par for the course not only in politics but also in personal relationships, business and just about every endeavor under the sun. Truly, there (is nothing) are few things that people do without expecting something in return. And maybe that's okay but it still makes me cynical about what really motivates people.



But I digress . . . If all relationships are based on some, small form of reciprocity than so be it. And even when folks find one engagement not-so-fulfilling then they're simply going to move onto the next raw deal . . . It's the human condition I guess and it's also why guys have more problems with their mistresses than their wives in the long run.

Anyway, people often ask me what motivates me to publish this blog (other than boredom) given that I don't run ads and haven't really garnered any benefit from it. Sad thing is, I don't have an answer but I do admit that reading the insane reactions of people who don't get the joke is always pretty pleasing. Finally, while this digital footprint on the planet is an infinitesimal dent on the rusty car body of human discourse . . . It's not a bad way to spend a small amount of time. That's why I blog and I'm glad so many of you are blogging as well . . . I look forward to reading what most of you folks have to share, from the high powered bloggers to the spectacular insights of people behind blogs like Pomegranate Pretty who capture so much of the intricacies of the human experience.

Rock on!

Finally . . .

Our so-called leaders speak
With words they try to jail you
The subjugate the meek
But its the rhetoric of failure
We are spirits in the material world



In completely unrelated news . . . Be careful out there this weekend folks. The KCPD is keeping the roads safe by locking up a lot of drunk people so it's really better to either stagger home or call a friend (chump) to give you a ride (no homo).

As always, thank you for reading this week and have a fun and safe weekend.

Today's draft and maybe tomorrow's as well

The Chiefs choose a wide receiver (no homo) and sadly, with 9 soldiers recently killed in Iraq . . . I wonder if young, football fans aren't going to get more acquainted with another kind of draft that nobody's cheering for . . . Actually, I know there won't be a draft but it also seems really sad that people are dying in a war when most of the world (and this country) thinks the U.S. should be packing its bags in Iraq.

WTF? Bill (Fucking) Skaggs!!! Really?!!!

Just like a the cowardly, liberal administration that I had always thought the Funkhouser administration represented the guy basically just turned his back on all of Kansas City South of the river when he appointed Bill Skaggs to be be mayor pro tem. Sure, I'm guess Bill Skaggs is just as qualified as anybody else but appointing somebody who is In-District in the part of town that overwhelmingly supported Funkhouser is nothing more than political payback, politics as usual and just really looks the there's nothing new from The Funkhouser Administration . . . City that works . . . Whatever.

And the fact that he did it on Friday afternoon really just proves that the guy knew the move would make most of KC mad . . . It's right out of the playbook of Country Club Kay . . . Oh, please Funkhouser fans don't try and defend this one because there isn't anybody South of the River Market has had much experience or contact with Skaggs . . . Despite the fact that I'm sure he's a good guy.

But even the pose about "qualifications" is classic stereotypical excuse from The White man when he wants to passover a minority or anybody but the close relative/political ally he already had in mind for a promotion.

Here are some alternate headlines in nice big type so that everyone who reads this page understand that this is on of many sellouts that Funkhouser will commit during his tenure:

Funkhouser pulls a Hiesman on the Eastside

Most of KC fooled on Friday Afternoon

A City that works . . . For the Northland

It's kind of sad really, Funkhouser seems to have willfully passed up his first chance to create any kind of coalition among the many diverse segments of the City . . . The 4th District is hurt by this decision because we're never going to see Skaggs and the 6th District should start worrying as well because it means that you folks are even further down the list. Cathy Jolly (A woman who got way more votes than Funkhouser from across the City would have been a much better choice and she's more experienced as a legislator) . . . And don't think of this as an endorsement of Alvin Brooks . . . The only thing I want to point out is that he was far more upfront about who he owed (i.e. Black people, Unions and all of the other typical KC special interest) whereas Mayor Funky fooled everyone into thinking he had the best interests of this entire City at heart rather than just cementing his standing up North.

The (Democrat) clowns come to KC

It's not that I really give a damn about the Democrats but I notice that they're only interest in this part of the country is when it's time to pick up a check . . . I just think it's kind of sad that KC almost never sees these people unless it's at a fundraiser . . . Here are the details and it's clear you need a couple of grand of disposable income to make a difference in politics or to get a handshake with any presidential contender:

The three leading contenders — Hillary Clinton, Barack Obama and John Edwards — will all visit Kansas City to hold fundraisers.

Clinton's visit will be May 5. At 9 a.m., she will stop by the Intercontinental Kansas City at the Plaza for brunch. The cost: $2,300 for a VIP brunch reception (the maximum donation allowed under federal law) or $1,000 for the brunch without the VIP treatment.

Obama visits the next weekend on May 12. At 12:15 p.m., he will stop at One Park Place for a reception. The VIP ticket costs $2,300, while a general reception costs $1,000. At 2 p.m., Obama will appear at a Kansas City kickoff for his campaign at the Downtown Marriott. Admission is $25, but students can get in for $10. Go to My.barackobama.com/kckickoff to register. Tickets will not be available at the door.

Full Disclosure: I'll probably vote for Bill Richardson even if he doesn't make it past the primary or unless the Republicans make with the Amnesty Ronald Reagan style! Orale!!!

STL family values

Like any good resident of Kansas City . . . I always look for details about how horrible life is in and around STL and then thank my lucky stars that I live here . . In this Show-Me State/I-70 series of misery . . . KC almost always comes out on the winning end.

Anyway, here's a horrible, frightening story that should make you feel better about your childhood even if you didn't get to spend it playing video games:

A child forced to work off a drug debt was essentially “bought and sold for crack cocaine,” according to U.S. Attorney Catherine Hanaway.

Darrill Gray, 51, of St. Louis pleaded guilty to a federal charge involving the prostitution of a juvenile.

According to statements made in court during Gray’s plea, another man, John Geiler, took a girl younger than 18 to Gray’s house in January. He told Gray the girl owed him money, and he wanted to leave her with Gray so she could work as a prostitute to pay off her debt.

Gray provided the girl with crack cocaine and engaged in a sex act with her while she lived with him.

Men visited Gray and would go into other parts of the house with the girl, presumably to have sex with her, according to a statement from the prosecutor’s office.

Gray ultimately let the girl leave with another person in exchange for the promise of crack cocaine.

My God . . . First of all the details are excruciating but also . . . I didn't know people were still smoking crack (???) To me that seems so . . . New Jack City . . . Unfortunately, I guess (just like all scary STL crime stories) some things never go out of style.

Homicide number 26 in KC

Channel 9 reports: Investigators said police were called to a home in the 4200 block of Highland for a disturbance. Officers said that when they arrived, they found a black male in his early 20's, inside a parked vehicle suffering from a gunshot wound.

TKC parenting tip: It's probably not a good idea to beat your kid with a belt

Additionally, we've learned that calling a kid a pig isn't a good idea either . . . Certainly I don't advocate child abuse whatsoever, in fact . . . If recent parenting troubles in the media don't serve as a reminder to use condoms . . . Then you've probably already had a vasectomy. Anyway, here's local family drama story that shouldn't seem all that shocking to 70's babies who unfortunately couldn't count on the Child abuse hotline: According to police reports, officers saw the boy running down the street in his underwear and one sock near 29th Street and Indiana Avenue. The boy told police that he had been hit with two belts and that his father struck him "for being bad at school."

A28

Local blogger J-Dub is a great guy, I read his blog and I agree with him most of the time. However, I'm surprised he's hoping on board the "Impeach" movement today . . . It's kind of enlightening to know that even some people who I read regularly and respect seem to be pissed off at the Administration . . . Interesting and just another reason you should be reading J-Dub at Mo Common Sense.

Here's some Internets dirt on Harry Ingels

KC Confidential describes City Hall insider Harry Ingels as Chuck Eddy's right hand man and a "rotten apple" who is now going to be in Russ Johnson's administration. I don't really know the guy but the post offers an interesting perspective on how the incoming City Council isn't going to be a "new" as it seems . . . In fact, because the new Council is comprised of so many women I can promise that just like any glamorous makeover: Only the superficial things will be fixed when the rotten underbelly (ew) is what really needed repair.

Kansas City loses out on free carbs: Royals bagel promotion goes bust

The Royals and Panera Bread promised bagels in some kind of silly promotion. Panera couldn't come through and the marketing gimmick quickly went "a rye" . . . . (HAHAHAHAHHAHAA! That's funny to me, I don't give a funk if you think that's stupid because it cracks me up!!!!!)

Here's some excerpted crumbs (narf) for you :

"There was a note on the door: 'Royals fans, we're sorry but the tickets expired. We're no longer giving out bagels,'" Alexander said.

Panera's marketing vice president told KMBC that they were counting on 20 percent redemption for the bagel deal. They had expected about 6,400 people to show up for free bagels, but they got more than 8,500.

Anyway, I don't really feel sorry for anybody in this situation . . . If the Royals can't put together a decent pitching line up with the millions that they've thrown away on the team then I wouldn't expect them to get anything as easy as passing out bagels coupons right . . . And as far as angry fans that want free food . . . These are the same people who pay 12 dollars for a beer, so obviously their priorities are out of place and angry Midwestern fatties who want their free merchandise because a ticket says so is almost as good as floor show for anybody lucky enough to see the more than 8,500 people panicking at Panera because they couldn't find an excuse to eat more cream cheese.

Finally, this story reminds me how little things have changed in the grand scheme of things . . . The Romans would bitch and complain when they weren't getting "bread and games" as well but then again they had orgies and Christian executions to watch so I bet that made up for it . . . Whereas I'm forced to watch the Democrat Presidential debates when I need a laugh.

Todd Graves was gonna get fired

From The Star: Dave Helling and Steve Kraske write up the revelation that former U.S. attorney Todd Graves of Kansas City was on a list of federal prosecutors to be replaced. And while this may not matter to anybody but the upper echelon politicos in this town . . . I guess it might be more evidence that the Alberto Gonzalez scandal has finally taken hold in Kansas City. . . Which basically means that it's old news and/or almost over. Personally, it's no big surprise to me that white people both liberal and conservative are calling for the public political lynching of this country's highest ranking Latino . . . Call it a change in the political climate and further evidence that they don't want any more Mexicans on the Great Lawn.

TKC is your least favorite lawn boy

Sure, Spring is all well and good until it's time to start mowing lawns.

More (misguided and ill informed) social criticism to come . . . Later . . . Right now I'm sitting here crying, sniffling and sneezing not only because of the sadness I feel thinking about the evils of the world - once again the Germans have a great word for this: "Weltschmerz" . . . Those guys have a word for EVERYTHING!!! - But also because of the damn pollen, ragweed and the fact that I'm not a fan of physical labor unlike most of my ethnic brethren . . . But mostly the pollen. Anyway, more posts to come unless I decide that I want to spend the rest of the day listening to old Enigma CDs and fondling myself . . . I guess it's all about multi-tasking.

Suggestions for Kansas City

Local blogger Ray Barker files an excellent set of suggestions for Kansas City in his latest post. The suggestions are really well written and he provides some great reasoning to back up his wish list . . . As an added bonus, if his dream plan is carried out and Kansas City becomes an urban mecca for bikers and completely supportive of public transportation . . . Then I'm moving.

Who am I kidding? If any of this stuff happens the powers that be will most likely force me out of my mom's basement by way of eminent domain.

Kansas State Prison takes Sheryl Crow's advice

Crime is a dirty business (ew) : The state prison at Hutchinson is trying to trim its budget by limiting inmates to four rolls of toilet paper each month.

Also, the stench alone seems as if it would qualify for cruel and unusual punishment . . . For the guards at least.

Substance abuse sidelines Allen

KSHB reports: The NFL suspends Chiefs defensive end Jared Allen for the first four games of the 2007 season for violating its substance-abuse policy.

Kucinich crazies/Cheney detractors in KC!!!

Actually, I don't think it's all that crazy to want Dick Cheney to retire and live a long and happy life while the interest of his Haliburton stock options accrues . . . Still, Dennis Kucinich leading anything but a cadre of elves during X-mas in the line to see Santa strikes me as funny.

But this isn't funny, it's serious(ly not gonna work) and across America this weekend there is an effort to call for Dick Cheney's impeachment . . . Here's the KC part:

This weekend we, the People of Kansas City, will not remain silent. We will "spell it out" here, in solidarity with over 100 other cities, in the center of the Kansas City metro area. We will meet at Theis Park, 47th & Oak, in Kansas City, Missouri to spell out IMPEACH with our bodies, and follow with a picnic in the park.

Actually, that could be kinda hot if the liberal folks at the park were bikini models and not the tye-died crusty old hippies that usually show up at these things . . . Still, I guess a picnic sounds nice and if Saturdays aren't for lost causes then at least they provide a wonderful moment to eat chicken salad and earn a place on a government watch list.

Crime Costs Kansas City

A fantastic article from The Star today offers a glimpse of a report released Tuesday at the Board of Police Commissioners which calculates the cost of crime in Kansas City at least in terms of the expenditures that the KCPD must take on in tackling whatever cases come their way.

Here's the damage:

One murder cost at least $7,837 in police salaries.

The police price tag for other crimes in which a suspect is immediately known: $4,639 for an aggravated assault, $4,088 for a robbery and $5,856 for a rape.

As far as repeat offenders go . . . They're even more expensive. Here's some of the bill racked up by real life cases of recidivism:

One domestic assault suspect previously arrested in nine assaults and one robbery: $45,839.

A man investigated for auto theft, nine assaults and two robberies: $49,927.

A convicted robber previously arrested for four aggravated assaults, one rape and one robbery: $28,500.

And as far as an alternative approach to crime that focuses on prevention . . . This really is a brilliant way to frame the topic of crime in Kansas City. KCPD Chief Corwin notes that if there was some way to intervene before criminals became part of this EXPENSIVE process it would not only save innocent victims but also save the City a ton of cash . . . Finally, while the local elections proved that politicos didn't want to touch the subject of crime and the few voters who cast their ballots didn't believe that the topic mattered on the bright side of Troost . . . This study offers proof that even if folks in KC naively think they won't fall victim to violence or crime because of their blessed demographic . . . It's still hurting the pocketbook of this entire city.

Pro-justice, No peace

If you care at all about the conversation going on the local internets or the ability of a local blogger to strike a chord, you'll want to check out a couple of posts by Little Miss Chatterbox . . . Her first post regarding the controversy over the recent Bill Moyers documentary elicited a ton of reaction. Today, she follows up with a review of the show and some honest and forthright explanation of her beliefs . . .

I don't consider myself to be pro-death penalty or pro-war but I consider myself to be pro-justice!! A loving God has to support justice being done or the wicked are allowed to run free and prey on innocent people without fear of consequence. War and the death penalty may seem cruel but they serve to prevent more innocent lives being snuffed out by those that are evil in our society.

Personally, this is some of the best explanation regarding the conservative case for war and other harsh measures on a moral basis that I've ever read . . . Really, if your sick of watching Sean Hannity stumble over words and apologize for every half-baked Republican idea then you might want to give LMC a read because I think she comes closest to what's in the heart of the few remaining people who support the war in Iraq . . . Who aren't cashing checks from Halliburton.

(Un)sexy headline of the day

KSHB provides this gem: "Metro lube shops and their dirty deals" . . . Additionally, that story is neither as interesting as it sounds nor as nasty.

Brandon Rush to NBA

For a 21 year-old guy who can potentially make millions for putting a ball through a hoop . .. School is definitely for suckers . . . However, for those of us without talent, height or a decent jumpshot who still want to avoid higher education there's still the option of becoming a gangsta rapper . . . Which isn't as easy as you think and probably requires getting shot.

Affirmative action progress as Kansas City's construction boom comes to an end!!!

Terry Riley doesn't have great timing but at least his heart is in the right place when it comes to a bit of legislation that's sure to be challenged regarding efforts to include minorities in construction jobs funded by the City. The Star reports: The new measure establishes goals for companies bidding on construction contracts above $324,000. It sets a minimum companywide work-force goal for contractors performing work for the city of 10 percent minority and 2 percent women, unless they seek a waiver. Those percentages are reasonable in the current market and can be increased as conditions improve, advocates said.

Touring the Streets of KC

Okay, if I wasn't in a good mood today I would have made a joke about how I was hoping that a guy who videotaped a tour of downtown KC on his motorcycle would have crashed in order to make his movie more exciting . . . HOWEVER, it's nice to see somebody so enthusiastic about the development of this town even if I disagree with some of the statements about Kansas City . . . Anyway, it's a neat video and probably the closest I'll ever get to riding a motorcycle not only because I'm not a fan of head injuries but also because I already have enough people in this city hoping to run me over.

Cauthen's raise that may only last 3 days

T minus 3 days until the Cauthen Countdown really gets going: Yesterday, the City Council helped to put a target on the back of one of the most powerful Black guys in Kansas City . . . In one of their last moves the Kansas City Council on Thursday gave City Manager Wayne Cauthen a satisfactory evaluation, triggering a raise and bonuses . . . Cauthen's base salary will increase from $205,000 to $215,000 on Tuesday. In addition, he will be entitled to incentive pay of at least $30,000, based on meeting certain threshold performance measures in workplace diversity, management of capital improvement projects and revenue goals.

But here's the thing . . . If Funkhouser is even halfway serious about the sweeping changes that he has promised, it simply doesn't make sense to keep the same City Manager that has been so integral in achieving the exact opposite of the Mayor-elect's campaign platform. Cauthen was Mayor Kay's right hand man and to let him continue being one of the most powerful people in City Hall will signify that Funkhouser isn't serious . . . Additionally, if TV reality shows have informed me correctly . . . Getting rid or firing the Black guy is always the safe move . . . So I hope Cauthen buys something nice with his new salary that he'll only collect for a few days . . . Because it's clear that his days and City Manager in KC are numbered.

Handling the ball (nullus)

Here's how you can become a part of the giant pose regarding "regular people" and the party that's supposed to prove that KC's new mayor is thinking about you and not using this town as a stepping stone to bigger and better things . . . The Star reports: Beginning Saturday, residents can pick up free wristbands to get into mayor-elect Mark Funkhouser’s inaugural ball at Union Station.

There's no money in helping po'folk

City Vision Ministries is apparently sick of building domiciles for area poor people and instead wants to concentrate on "a market-rate project that will be aimed at young professionals, singles and employees of the nearby University of Kansas Medical Center." Put simply, saving the world doesn't exactly pay the rent while making room for yuppies is a proven path for success . . . As long as a sweet TIF deal is picking up the tab.

The KC Area becomes minor leauge

Is the latest trend in KC sports to turn away from overpaid and under-performing athletes in favor of minor league competition where a smaller group of fans can not only afford ticket prices but also take a look at people playing for the love of the game and not just in order to stay in a higher tax bracket? That may or may not be true but cities surrounding KC proper are looking toward the minor leagues to generate revenue.

Currently, Independence appears to have joined Cass County in seeking a minor league entry. The Star reports that "a plan that called for a Belton arena to be in use 96 nights a year, draw 351,000 in attendance and generate taxable revenue of $11.47 million. The project also calls for 179,000 square feet of retail, restaurant and hotel space that would generate an additional $40.7 million."

Additionally, Lee's Summit is considering bringing another minor league team to the metro area as well.

Sadly, any talk of new sports teams or arenas brings about the inevitable discussion of taxpayer subsidies but it's worth noting that a lot of people in the smaller towns around KC may be quickly getting tired of cheering for teams that are either on a hopeless losing streak like the Royals or in the case of the Chiefs are simply too pricey for most people to see in person.

People in Glass Houses

It's been raining all week and honestly I love this time of year in KC because just when it seems as if the sun will never come out again . . . It shows up and grants a bit of perspective on all of the stormy weather.

Anyway, a recent photoset on an internet message board show KC Construction under the specter of recent gray skies . . . Honestly it looks depressing, cold and lifeless but I'm certain (at least for a couple of weeks) the hopes and dreams of the construction cheerleaders in this town will get their day in the sun even if the Sprint Center never sees a professional sports franchise and things that are supposed to fall into place for the downtown "renaissance" don't happen exactly the way everyone planned.

Why aren't they trying to trade LJ?

The guy isn't happy here, he can't play in the clutch and his interest in male modeling (nullus) and endorsements seems to outrank his love for the game or at least his interest in blocking . . . So if the "Chiefs insist there's no effort to trade Larry Johnson" . . . There certainly should be . . . Because he's far more valuable to the team as a bargaining chip than as yet another overpaid, complaining running back.

Minnesota Commiseration: "It's sad to see what’s happened to the Royals."

A great post from the Minnesota Public Radio baseball blog entitled "The Bleacher Bums." Apparently, the folks who run this blog were once fans of KC's team and they even remember George Brett's ass problems (ew) which cost KC the 1980 world series against the Phillies. The last passage of their blog post sums up things nicely: "Give the state of the current team, I'm sure Royals fans remember the hemorrhoids incident with great fondness." However, don't get to misty eyes, they're looking forward to beating the hell out of KC in the remaining 14 games KC has scheduled with the Twins.

The X-man celebrates second rate comics

"Anyone remember Gold Key comics?"

Behind the scenes

A local newsie deals as desperate PR people want to bring a horse (WTF?) to an interview.

More fun with a local photog

You might remember that I posted a brief profile of local photog J.E. Johnson sometime last week . . . Well, since that time the very talented guy has compiled a killer set of photos in which he demonstrates that he has a better time than nearly everybody I know . . . And yes, he has pictures to prove it along with some fashion photography that's better than anything I've seen in most local magazines.

What I like even more about this amazing photoset is that Mr. Johnson has a good eye for capturing good times . . . Most party photos usually contain amazing looking girls with one eye closed or looking as if they're about to pass gas . . . Not this guy, seriously it's rare to see somebody with such a keen eye posting awesome photos like these of KC area nightlife and beautiful people.

Tomorrow we start playing favorites

So . . . I'm all set to call failure on tomorrow's announcement of committee assignments . . . Here's what I'll be looking at: The lack of any significant increase in Latino representation that flies in the face of the 67% support of Funkhouser garnered from the Latino community in his razor thin margin of victory . . . And I wonder if he'll have the courage to appoint any new faces other than the same old La Raza Political Club cronies or the same of folks who are forced upon the community at every turn . . . Also, his Latino pals who did show their support really don't have much standing in the community and their political payoffs will likely be received as tokenism (at least by me) . . . So, it's pretty much a lose-lose situation all around . . . Also, because Funkhouser's campaign was pretty much comprised of giving the shaft to the Black community (ew) look for there to be a bunch of Black people on these committees as well . . . As some kind of olive branch to that community . . . If not, then he might face problems sooner than he thinks from "The Black Part of Town."

Anyway, this press conference probably marks the very first time and place where phony ideals that fit on billboards will turn into decisions that will inevitably alienate somebody:

WHO: Mayor-Elect Mark Funkhouser and the incoming City Council
WHAT: Announcement of committee assignments
WHEN: 3 p.m., Friday, April 27
WHERE: 1800 Summit

Note . . . One more reason not to expect good things . . . It's a classic PR trick to give bad news on a Friday afternoon. That trick is right out of the film classic Office Space and it's a good move to ensure that the press doesn't really have the time or the will to talk about it over the weekend.

It's only police brutality when the cameras are rolling

Clay County deputy caught on tape while beating handcuffed suspect . . .

Mayor Kay at the Aladdin Hotel

Newly remodeled downtown hotel with some of the original art deco designs is too pricey for me but seems to be a nice addition to the area.

Family drama

For some strange reason, all of the interesting links I'm coming across this afternoon have to do with criminal activities and allegedly some very funked up families. Take a look and then go hug your mom and dad:

From KC Crime Scene: A 22-year-old guy from KCK has been sentenced to 40 years in prison for having his mom and his 16-year-old sis deal drugs for him while he was awaiting sentencing on another drug charge . . .

KCTV 5 reports: Two men were taken into police custody, accused of sex crimes against a 14-year-old girl. The men, brothers, were awaiting charges of rape and indecent liberties.

A man convicted of stabbing his cousin to death and dumping the body found with 54 stab wounds in a park near 70th Street and North Congress in Kansas City was sentenced to more than 25 years in jail today.

COMBAT and keeping the Latinos quiet

I don't want to go into much detail here but it seems that anybody who thought that Mike Sanders would bring in a new era of efficiency, integrity and cooperation at the County Courthouse was just plain wrong . . . Some e-mails sent my way along with a lot of public sentiment pretty much prove that it's business as usual for the County and make it clear nothing much has changed.

More specifically, Luis Cordova a new member of the COMBAT Resource Committee and one of the few Latino voices at the County is basically being told to keep his mouth shut . . . Which goes a long way toward proving that minority access at the County Courthouse is still as limited as ever unless you're one the of new Black friends that Mike Sanders has garnered in what seems to be (in the grand sense) just another game of musical chairs for differing sets of minority leaders working alongside County government.

Anyway, here is the juiciest bit of correspondence allegedly sent from Jim Nunnelly, an administrator of Jackson County's COMBAT anti-drug program who seems to be giving Cordova the standard line that's used when most politicos address local Latinos (i.e. "Wait over there quietly in the corner Pancho") or anybody else they want to blow off (no homo). Check it:

>>> Jim Nunnelly 4/24/2007 12:51 PM >>>
Luis, it is unreasonable to expect the committee to come forth with some viable recommendations, without some fundamental understanding of the programs that COMBAT funds. As they get comfortable, the issues you raise will be dealt with, but only at their discretion . . . Thus, there will be an opportunity for you to voice any programmatic concerns you may have, at some point. We will take whatever time necessary but remember that Dan Tarwater wanted a quicker turnaround. Moreover, it is essential that we provide them with just enough information to tackle the harder issues i.e. programmatic structure, evaluation, publicity, innovation, effectiveness, integration, and changing needs of the population . . . I will forward your concerns to Mike and make sure you are heard. However, please do not conclude anything at this time...it is only the beginning steps. Thanks for your suggestions. Remember you were chosen to offer your views and you will be given an opportunity to do so.....

There are a lot of other issues brought into play by this e-mail . . . Most importantly, the Combat Resource Committee doesn't seem to have much autonomy at all if they're being told when to roll over, play fetch, when to speak and how long they must raise their hand before they're called upon . . . Put simply, if the members of the Resource Committee are going to be put in check they don't seem to be much of a check, balance or even a worthwhile endeavor for anyone taking part.

Secondly, talk to any Latino who works in politics and they'll most likely note that the condescending attitudes from their colleagues are some of the first obstacles they have to overcome. From both white and Black people in power . . . If a Latino wants to take part in the political process they better become accustomed to getting talked down to and ignored. Certainly, other than a few bright spots, I wouldn't count on Latinos getting anything other than the shaft (ew) from County Government in the near future given the attitudes of the current power brokers.

Truman Road flooded with something other than used cars and homeless people today

Water Main Break Closes Truman Road. Truman Road flooded with something other than used cars and homeless people today.

Brookside Art Fair Info

The first weekend in May looks to be jam packed with stuff to do . . . The Brookside Art Fair one more event to add to the list around Cinco De Mayo time if you don't feel like hanging around with Mexicans and would rather enjoy high (and low) art.

Making it easier to be the ghey at City Hall

The Kansas City Council will vote today on a measure to make it easier for city employees to get domestic partner benefits . . . The measure tentatively approved Wednesday by the Finance Committee eases the eligibility requirements imposed on employees applying for health benefits and sick and funeral leave benefits associated with their domestic partners.

School's Out

Recently, Superintendent Amato received approval to reorganize that KC School District . . . The move is being noted as "the largest reorganization of district schools in 20 years." It's the first step toward turning around a district that's been in decline and losing students for more than a generation. Here are a few more changes that could soon be taking place:

•Establish universal, full-day prekindergarten programs for all district children 3 to 5 years old.

•Remove the magnet status from several elementary schools.

•Require students who are assigned to new neighborhood schools to begin attending those schools for the 2008-2009 school year if the student is below the fifth grade. New residents and incoming kindergartners would be assigned according to the new boundaries starting next fall.

What's most interesting (to me) in this endeavor is that it signifies a move BACK TO NEIGHBORHOOD SCHOOLS which was abandoned and dismissed as "inherently racist" during the go-go 80's and early 90's when the KCMO School District was drunk with money (BILLIONS) from a desegregation decision that has now turned out to be ONE OF THE BIGGEST FAILURES IN THE HISTORY OF PUBLIC EDUCTION IN THE UNITED STATES pioneered by U.S. District Judge Russell G. Clark who more than any misguided Democrat is personally responsible for destroying public education in Kansas City.

Really, year after year Clark guided the KC School District down a path that guaranteed disaster which stupidly and naively concentrated on making schools integrated rather than just making them halfway decent. From Russian fencing coaches to Olympic sized swimming pools . . . The white students never came and stink of an overwhelming failure and BILLIONS wasted over the years seems as if it will forever haunt any attempt to resurrect public schools in KC.

So now public schools in KC have come full circle . . . In a way . . . It should be noted that the end result of decades of mismanagement has left KC behind so many other districts that don't have to struggle with the perception of hopelessness or the legacy of a place that has been largely abandoned by the KC area's white population and then used as a guinea pig for every misguided social experiment that local liberals mistakenly believed would replace community/neighborhood/parental involvement in the education of their youth.

Debate over mostly empty Kansas City museums extended

The Star reports that The Kansas City Museum at Corinthian Hall will remain open while Kansas City and Union Station continue to negotiate a new management contract.

Funding for construction more important than secure college loan program

The Star reports: Partial MoHELA sale OK’d . . . After equal measures of wrangling, deal cutting and hardball politics, the Senate on Wednesday approved the partial sale of Missouri’s college loan agency to fund university construction projects.

New upskirt photo policy for students???

Because I don't have much of a social life . . . I think the case of a local suburban student caught taking upskirt photos presents an interesting array of problems.

Shawnee Mission School District administrators had already been working on changes to the district's cell phone policies, but an alleged incident of a boy taking pictures up a girl's skirt gives the district more to consider.

Prairie Village Police say it happened at Mission Valley Middle School on April 17. A 12-year-old boy had apparently used his cell phone to take pictures up the skirt of a 13-year-old girl. Three pictures were found on the cell phone, police say. Next month the Shawnee Mission School District may approve changes to the cell phone policy . . . Police say they have sent the case file to juvenile authorities to consider possible charges.

If all of those cheesy 50's movies I've watched on cable TV over the years have informed me correctly . . . Dumb, pervy students have been looking up skirts since the beginning of time and it hasn't been a matter for the police, but if you add a camera and a small hard drive on the cell phone that seem ubiquitous for most suburban students out of kindergarten . . . Does that make it child pornography? Think that's ridiculous? It seems like the equivalent of prosecuting a troubled 15 year-old girl with sexual abuse of children, possession of child pornography and dissemination of child pornography for taking nude photos of herself and sending them out online.

My point here is simple and it's been noted countless times: Technology is rapidly changing every day situations and impacts almost every single interaction regardless of whether or not authorities want to distinguish between a portable hard drive or one on a desktop and what privilege is granted to one set of juveniles over another . . . When the ability to instantly broadcast any kind of content to a worldwide audience falls into the hands of (mostly privileged) children then the way a society views itself is going to be inexorably altered.

At the very least, we're probably in for a few laughs regarding the insane things that parents say to their offspring:

Student's face slashed, school does nothing

A fight over a boy leaves a local girl with 20 stitches mostly to her face. KCTV 5 reports that the parents claim: "The school didn't call the police or an ambulance for their daughter, and her mother had to take her to the hospital herself and call the police from there."

Larrytown legal battle over smokes goes to Kansas Supreme Court

The Lawrence smoking ban goes before the Kansas Supreme Court . . . However, the more popular activities of binge drinking and casual pot use in the college town remain still retain wide support.

It rained last night

In Kansas City, that's a news story!

Tyra Banks teaches suburban KC students an important lesson

It's not exactly news but a recent story I came across does indicate that commercial sponsored brainwashing is now advocated by the print media . . . Anything to keep innocent children away from the Internets. Anyway, the Blue Valley Sun reports that a Leawood sixth grader is mindlessly mimicking what she sees on TV and her parents and teachers are proud of her for it!!! I couldn't make it through the whole article but apparently the poor little kid took hold of something the Tyra Banks said in between commercials for herbal weight loss remedies, herpes control drugs and hair dye . . . I think it was some overly sentimental statement about body image or whatever and how it's important to be accepting of all people, places, races, shapes and sizes (a lie) because a Sports Illustrated Cover Babe says so.

Inspiring!!!

Irish Movie Premiere in Kansas City

Check out Irish KC for all the details regarding a fundraiser for the Jennifer Ireland Foundation and the local premiere of the highly acclaimed Irish film "The Wind That Shakes The Barley."

LMC Deals

My favorite conservative blogger Little Miss Chatterbox took a try at getting on TV with thousands of other people recently in KCK . . . Her story is captivating and a lot better than what the stereotypical views that the MSM is offering . . . Here's just a brief description of what she had to endure:

I wasn't insane enough to camp out like some did, there were over 2,000 people that were there by early morning. I didn't come until the afternoon but I did wait 5 1/2 hours. My number was 3383 and we heard that there were over 4,000 people that showed up. I had to fill out a one page questionnaire and when it was finally my turn I got 20 SECONDS to make my case for why I should be on the show.

Frankly, I'm surprised that so may people tried out for this one . . . Sure the money is nice and I like that the host doesn't want to shake hands with the contestants . . . In the long run, I guess this is good news for KCK given that so many people flocked to the area in order to take a chance . . . It seems to bode well for their new casino gambling efforts in addition to folks looking for a real estate market that isn't as pricey or high risk as KC proper.

Putting other people's money in perspective

Local blogger F Bombs provides some great perspective about the current bull market and why you should or shouldn't feel bad if you're broke.

Immigrant Rights March Take Two in KC!!!

I hope to post more on this topic later but for now check out the KC Blue Blogger as he provides information on the upcoming (second annual?) Immigrants Rights march on May 1st.

101 Ways To Annoy People

I didn't see "write a blog about local politics, culture and news featuring photos of hot and sexy white women" but maybe it'll make the list featured by this local blogger next year.

Important news from Kansas

Also, you can find anything on the Internets . . . Evolution-nextstep probably has the most pressing info (ew) on his site this morning. Check it: "the Finney County district attorney has dropped all charges against the young fellow accused of pinching one off in the school cafeteria peas." I don't know why but that somehow makes me feel better.

Another "Bishop Bomber" headline

This Iowa TV station reports: "According to the U.S. attorney's office in Chicago, John Tomkins, 42, of Dubuque was arrested this morning. He's a machinist at a Dubuque manufacturing company. Authorities say he's a former substitute letter carrier who worked weekends for the U.S. Postal Service."

Maybe posing naked broads on Fire Trucks will bring more people to Union Station

Fire museum moving to Union Station

Cauthen Countdown Continues: Pitch picks on defeated Black guys

In what has to be some of the most cowardly reporting during the post-election season the Pitch digs up campaign finance reports and asserts that the "contributions hint at the extent to which Denver businesses have infiltrated City Hall."

Thing is, I don't doubt this is true at all but the subtext of the overly picky piece which completely downplays the role of Burns & McDonnell in the City's Capital Improvements Management Office (CIMO) is nothing more than a hit piece on Wayne Cauthen and further indictment of Alvin Brooks . . . Again, I'm sure all of it is deserved but it's not like this report is really going out on a limb in order to beat up on two guys who are already on their way out.

What this is piece really is after is to quell some of the buyer's remorse that people are already starting to express with the Funkhouser Administration. The article attempts to play sleuth running down sketchy campaign contributions but doesn't delve into some of the big money that floated into Funkhouser's coffers as well . . . Additionally, not once during the election did the Pitch criticize the Big Media Blitz run by the Star to inundate Kansas City with pro-Funkhouser propaganda. Again, I'm asking: If this town's "alternative" press is going to unquestioningly stand behind the candidate that was put over the top by white suburbanites and KC's liberal power-elite then what exactly are they an "alternative" to???

It's also noteworthy that buried toward the end of the article is a quote from Funkhouser which seems okays most of the alleged malfeasance that that the reporter portrays as scoop: As city auditor, Funkhouser looked at CIMO in 2005 and concluded that Cauthen's decision to hire consultants was "reasonable."

Still, I can't deny that it's fun to kick a guy when he's down and out and that's exactly the kind of reporting that The Pitch has offered to this City's minority community in one issue after the next. Really, I've heard before that this tactic is a part of all New Times publications but it's clear to me now that these hipsters only show their teeth when the reputation of a person of color is in question . . . Well, that and mocking someone's religious beliefs . . . Which I can respect even if follows a formula.

Finally, while most of KC's media watchers on the net celebrate the imminent ousting of the most powerful Black guy in City Hall for whatever reason . . . I can't help but wonder what kind or representation the Funkhouser Administration will offer minorities given that his support comes almost completely from white people but his success hinges on at least faking a sense of cooperation in this community . . . Which he has done poorly so far.

Political profiling

Gasp! While watching the Colbert Report The Pitch discovers that a little known study citing so-called "selective prosecution" by federal prosecutors was penned by the brother of Kathryn Shields!!! Not that I'm against taking pot shots at KC's one time Queen of Mean but this tiny fact stretched over 1,200 words seems excessive if it weren't more informative than their cover story . . . Additionally, I'll never make it as a "journalist" considering that I have no idea how to get paid while watching cable TV.

Closing statements (other than good riddance)

The Kansas City School Board could vote today/tonight for a plan to close several schools.

Best headline of the day: "Mother Takes Two Bullets to Protect Daughter"

KCTV5 provides some captivating details of a local robbery gone wrong in which the victim's mom shows up wielding a baseball bat.

Just seconds after Paula drove into her family's driveway near 77th Terrace and Brooklyn, the two suspects pulled in right behind her. One of the criminals ran up to her car with a gun.

Paula, who was two months pregnant, said that one of the suspects tried to reach inside her bra to grab the money, so she started honking the horn.

That is when her mother, Jackie, grabbed a bat and came outside to protect her daughter.

One of the suspects fired two shots, hitting Jackie twice in the leg.

"Even when she got shot," Paula said, "She still stood out there until they left."

I don't get sentimental about much but this story almost brings tears to my eyes . . . Also, what kind of broad walks around with 2k in her bra????

Anyway, it's not something fit for a Hallmark Card ("I know you'd take a bullet for me Ma if somebody tried to take the money next to my boobie") BUT it's heartwarming nonetheless and reminds me of some of the finer late night cinema I've watched on Skin-a-max.

A glance at the small percentage of the weapons on KC streets

KSHB offers a rare look inside police gun room

What's the matter with Kansas? No tech industry for one thing

According to a recent article in the KC Biz Journal, Kansas ranks LAST when it comes to tech jobs. Most of the problem is being blamed on Sprint layoffs while folks then mutter something nasty about tech workers from India under their breath.

Kansas lost 2,000 technology jobs in 2005, according to an American Electronics Association (AeA) report released April 24. That's the largest loss of tech jobs among all 50 states, the District of Columbia and Puerto Rico, the report said. The majority of the job losses came in the telecommunications sector, where Kansas lost 2,400 of the state's 51,991 technology positions in 2005, the most recent data available.

It's not all bad news though, the lack of a tech industry in Kansas simply gives the many religious wack jobs around the state one less thing to complain about . . . Sure, the stories of Harry Potter always rile up the bible beating bunch but that's nothing compared to the sacreligious freedom, information and communities available online . . . Finally, I've noted before that the downturn at Sprint and tech job troubles make JoCo MILFS that much more widely available . . . Which really benefits us all.

Accusation from former employee: Phill Kline is hard on the ladies (hehe)

Channel 9 reports: An attorney fired from the Johnson County District Attorney's office said she was not given a reason for her firing. But she said it may have to do with a complaint she made over how women are treated in the office.

Pretty Jazz photos from Present Magazine

The local mag presents the Kinetic Jazz Trio at April's First Friday.

Take a look at how minorities and po'folk are being pushed out of Downtown KC

The Urban tour put on by Kansas City's Downtown Council is slated for May 5 - 6. It coincides with Cinco De Mayo so you can enjoy Tecate while getting an up close and personal look at gentrification.

Dante and Downtown living are overrated

In a deal for another draft pick, the Chiefs have sent Dante Hall to St. Louis . . . Last season was a pretty lackluster performance for the undersized player and I think his career in KC pretty much proved that he's a one trick pony who (like the rest of the team) can't play under pressure . . . However, this also means that his downtown condo is soon to go up for sale . . . Because I know a little bit about that development, I can tell you that the lackluster building with the so-called million dollar view will now be nearly half empty and seems to be under-performing just like Hall's kickoff returns.

But then, maybe I'm just guilty of being cynical once again . . . If a professional athlete paid hundreds of thousands of dollars to live downtown . . . Of course that means it's a wise investment for everyone one else as well.

Playing with your food

FOA: "The Kansas City Health Department is Stupid"

We've gotta get out of this place

From Irish KC: Flying Cheaply Out of Kansas City

FU from KC

I saw this (bad) link first on the Pitch (s)plog but I figure if they're stealing half their story ideas from me so I might as well take from those dopey liberals liberally. Anyway, some Crossroads hipsters are in a rage because (god forbid) somebody tried to steal their bike or something . . . Anyway, the local bike shop features a pretty big flickr gallery of people flipping the bird and bearing their ass . . . You guess which topic interests the pansies at The Pitch.

The Star and newspapers across the country are caught slipping

Actually, the news isn't that bad for KC's local paper: The Kansas City Star's daily circulation (Monday- Saturday) slipped 0.7% -- a victory these days -- to 261,367. Sunday circulation was weaker, down 2.3% to 359,255. But if the national trends are any indication . . . The writing is on the wall (not dead trees).

Kansas City gets wood

Earlier today I was watching two Mexican guys plant trees in a local park (No homo). I'm assuming that the City has contracted to plant trees all over this town during the Springtime.

In what was just a passing thought but I realized that at least some of those trees will still be there in one hundred years even if every Mexican in KC was booted back across the border next week. But for better or worse . . . That's not going to happen either.

People tend to leave their mark on places no matter how much some of use would like to erase their contribution. In some small way (not really) this little joke blog is my way of making a vague impression on the Internets and maybe political conversation in KC . . . Kind of like graffiti only with less talent.

Anyway, years from now people of KC will enjoy the shade and admire the beauty of the trees planted around the city today . . . And I wonder if they'll remember that they were planted by two guys who were most likely illegal immigrants.

Lincoln Town Car Kerfuffle

So far, here's the only thing that the people of Kansas City can say the Funkhouser administration is good at: Posing.

Yet again, the Star is dedicating even more ink (and countless trees) to the notion that Mayor-elect Mark Funkhouser is "an ordinary guy."

It's classic PR and it's pretty pointless . . . If you want a positive take on the subject, Gone Mild seems to buy the puff piece but I'm gonna remain skeptical.

So KC's top politico doesn't like the car that Mayor Kay leased for him: So-freaking-what????? Sadly, it's pretty much the highlight of the Star's editorial coverage today.

Mayor-elect Mark Funkhouser (right) plans to keep driving his 1997 Toyota Corolla. The car sat outside Funkhouser's West Side campaign headquarters Tuesday as he and Ed Wolf, his choice for chief of staff, left for a meeting.

Actually, I think the more newsworthy decision is that Funkhouser is forgoing bodyguards for the moment. If anything that's the more "common man" aspect of the article but it also seems reckless and yet another indication that Funkhouser doesn't really understand the true character of Kansas City. Sure . . . All of that "regular people" garbage is fine for carousing the many liberal coffeehouses and art galleries of the 4th District but lets see him strike the same stance on The Eastside or in South KC where there are plenty of pissed off people just waiting to get in the face of the first politico they see . . . Yeah, unless Funkhouser is planning on forging these Districts all together (which IS an option and pretty much what Mayor Kay did) then I'd feel a lot better with him using the City services for the purpose for which they're alloted rather than using yet another opportunity to play politics.

This kind of feel good propaganda seems to be the only thing that Funkhouser administration is effective at pulling off (nullus) . . . As he is about to take office, Funkhouser had the opportunity to speak up for the folks on Red Bridge Road or raise concern about even more tax abatement for Zona Rosa . . . Yet he cleverly avoided those issues and instead seemingly puts all of his efforts into the very same self-aggrandizement that fooled a very slim 850 vote majority who put him in power.

Bombastic

ABC News is reporting that there has been an arrest in the "Bishop Bomber" case.

Affirmative Action: What to do when there's no window dressing mandated!!!

Last night, when I watched a story about Ward Connerly coming to the Show-Me state in order to further his agenda and possibly repeal affirmative action laws in Missouri I have to admit I was a little peeved. But it's not what you think.

Of course, an old Black guy (multi-racial = non-white) degrading himself and begging for a pat on the head by conservatives is never a pleasant sight but then I got to thinking about worst case scenarios if he gets his way . . . What's going to change? . . . For me at least.

But first, here's what the anti-affirmative action activists are up to according to the Star:

An anti-affirmative-action group wants to have Missouri voters decide on an initiative banning what it calls state-level race-based “preferential treatment” in public contracting, education and employment . . . they wanted to follow the lead of California, Washington and Michigan, which passed similar initiatives banning racial preferences in state-sponsored programs . . . Organized by Tim Asher, a former admissions director at a Missouri community college. He said he complained about a diversity scholarship the college offered for underrepresented minorities, and the college has changed the scholarship.

Yeah . . . The fact that somebody who opposed all "special preferences" for minority college students was already working in admissions probably says a lot about who had "preference" to gain access into the ivory towers of whatever Missouri institution for which he worked . . . And I know the popular thing for me to do here is to say how little I've relied on affirmative action or racial preferences in my life . . . That's the standard line of any minority on the topic and while I never received one of those groovy Latino scholarships, I'm sure I would have gladly taken it, IF they weren't reserved for poster kids and the various cousins and offspring of higher ranking politicos than mi familia.

But let's look at the bigger picture, as far as I'm concerned. KC is a place where the so-called "downtown renaissance" has basically cut out all minorities from the recent building boom. After a ton of yelling, screaming and complaining only then did some of the bigger construction companies working downtown begrudgingly do the bare minimum required to meet low ball government requirements. Even better, take a walk and look at who's working downtown . . . All I see, everyday, is white guys in really big trucks helping to build the place. In fact, the reaction to Latinos protesting their exclusion in helping to build downtown last year was met with what could only be described as a lukewarm response.

And when we're talking about college admissions, the first stat that comes to mind is the standard line related to higher ed and the Black community which happens to be true and reveals that there are more young, Black guys in prison than in college . . . So I wonder why anybody would be up in arms about giving a guy a break if he belonged to the one and only ethic group in the world that is more (most?) likely to be in the lockup.

And yet while I think that there should be more Black people in Missouri colleges, it's worth pointing out that Latinos are (even more) overwhelmingly underrepresented in higher ed not only because so many drop out years earlier in order to have babies and mow lawns but also because nearly every Latino I've met (including me) already knows everything anyway so more schooling would just be redundant.

Anyway . . . Apparently, what Ward Connerly and other anti-affirmative action advocates believe is that minorities should trust the white people in power to be fair . . . It requires a lot of faith and that strategy didn't exactly work out for the Native Americans or the Jews ("this train is going where?") . . . However, I wouldn't count on the topic to raise a lot of ire in minority communities because nobody likes being thought of as a token even if it's part of their job description and/or reason for admission.

I'm guessing that the truth is that there will always be place for "affirmative action" hires and access even if its goes by another name . . . But the lesson here isn't that we've come so far as a society that there's no need to redact or offset the centuries systemic genocide, discrimination, enslavement, rape and oppression that have brought white people to power in the Western World . . . The point is that this kinder, gentler nation thinks that it no longer needs rules to guarantee a level playing field. And who knows? Maybe the absence of racial preferences just might bring about a new day in which so many Asian students can finally throw off the shackles of quotas that have held them back over the years and can be turned loose and allowed to garner record breaking achievements on college campuses here in Missouri.

Early Mornin' Tony

Good morning folks. I've got a few things to take care of before I start posting today, so you might want to watch some cartoons in the meantime.

Special thanks to Happy in Bag who brought this video to my attention. Obviously, the guy has awesome taste in music given some of his recommendations over at his music blog "There Stands the Glass" and I really like the song. It's reminiscent of some of my long ago (early 90's) favorite rap tunes.

Check it. Hopefully, more posts coming soon.

From Gangs to God

A captivating story from KC currents recounts the life of Marvin Kirkwood and his decision to change his life . . . The story coupled with another report regarding gang violence provided pretty comprehensive coverage of some of the lesser known players in KC's recent gang war along with a few perspectives that might have been overlooked.

Parkville Brewfest!!! Party on!!

The KC Kitty provides all the details you won't be able to remember if you really enjoy the outdoor event.

Pubic Public transportation peril: Cars can kill you even if you care about the environment

KCTV 5 reports: A man was recovering after being hit by a car on Monday night. Police said the man had just gotten off a bus at 47th and State Avenue in KCK when he was clipped.

TKC Afternoon update

Here are a few links that I've been reading:

Accused Child Molester Remains at Large in Liberty

Woman Robbed Inside Her Car

Awards for dedicated service and then one certificate for snitching: 3 Police Officers, Citizen Honored For Service

1 In Custody In Connection With Weekend KCK Fatal Fire

Show-me State protects the rights of gun owners. From Crime Scene KC: "In a crisis, police won't be able to confiscate law-abiders' guns" And this makes me think . . . A crisis would be when you needed your gun most, unless you were really lazy during instances when you lost the remote . . . Which could very well be called a crisis of sorts.

Former Councilman Fairfield gets a real job

The Biz Journal reports: Outgoing Kansas City Councilman John Fairfield will join Polsinelli Shalton Flanigan Suelthaus PC the day after his council term expires.

Scenes from a KC Quick Trip

Death's Door describes his (least) favorite local (in)convenience store so accurately . . . You almost feel as if you were there, paying $1.26 for a soda.

KC School District is da bomb

Channel 9 reports that: Authorities investigated a bomb threat at Van Horn High School Tuesday morning.

County Exec Mike Sanders is as "happy as a little girl" with Rep. Sam Graves

Maybe you haven't noticed but more than a few people have called into question the suddenly chummy relationship between County Executive Mike Sanders and Republican Rep. Sam Graves.

Over the past few days, while Sanders has been crossing his fingers and hoping that the Republican powers that be in Jefferson City will grant him more money to lock up a greater percentage of (mostly brown) po'folk in Kansas City . . . Even The Star has noted the creepy public love fest of which Graves and Sanders seem to be starring.

Well it seems that other folks are taking notice and rumors are circulating that Mike Sanders might, just might hold a fundraiser for Sam Graves.

On one hand, this makes sense since nobody from the Barnes camp even pretended to like Sanders and the prevailing wisdom (usually wrong) is that she's going to run against the guy.

However, supporting Graves so openly might just alienate many who support Sanders given Kansas City's overwhelmingly Democrat bias.

Who knows? The only thing clear is that there seems to be a lot more behind this new political partnership than many folks in KC would be comfortable with (ew) . . . And, personally, I'm just waiting for the pair to start holding hands.

Kansas City Losers

You know, sometimes I tend to fall for the vaguely commie idea of economic determinism just like Mayor-elect Mark Funkhouser and his cold Vulcan logic which mistakenly believes that attempting to turn Kansas City into Des Moines is going to solve all of this town's problems. Thing is, there are so many other factors that come into play in determining the character of a city but most of that reasoning is lost on people who just wanted to vote for a white guy and feel good about it for a change.

But I digress . . .

What I want to point out in this post is that after the billions of dollars that this city has spent on professional sports franchises over the years Kansas City was recently ranked as one of the all time Losingest Sports Cities in North America. And I was thinking that just doesn't bode well for the future of KC considering that so much of this town's economic development has been built around sports teams which historically have been mediocre at best.

ESPN tallied the results early this month and they show that every franchise (other than the Chiefs) in Kansas City has a losing record over time. In fact, our beloved town filled out the top ten in the long list of losers:

10. KANSAS CITY | Record: 4,774-5,445-33 (.533)

Teams:
• NHL: Scouts (1974-1976): 27-110-23-0-0
• NFL: Chiefs (1966-2007): 330-285-9, Blues/Cowboys (defunct; 1924-1926): 12-15-1
• NBA: Kings (1976-1985): 381-439, KC/Omaha Kings (1973-1975): 113-133
• MLB: Royals (1969-2007): 2934-3083: Athletics (1955-1967): 829-1224, Packers (Fed League; 1914-1915): 148-156

Now you could blame this on the small media market but I'm guessing that it's something deeper than that . . . Maybe a Stephen-King-type-thing and it's some kind of horrid chud lurking in the sewers and contaminating the drinking water with mediocrity (which is why I drink so much Dr. Pepper to remain awesome). I don't know. But what I do know is that any new sports franchise that comes to Kansas City is almost guaranteed to be a failure over the long haul if history is to be believed over the hype of real estate developers who are madly trying to unburden themselves of non-liquid assets before the inevitable recession which always accompanies losing a war eventually takes hold.

And in the end, I don't know if there's anything that Mayor-elect Funkhouser can do about it seeing as though his slight frame and mild manner couldn't really help out a sports franchise despite the fact that he's so tall. Additionally, the Mayor-elect's answer to the dilemma (read: debacle) regarding the empty Sprint Center has been to claim that "tractor pulls" and other low grade attractions will make up the difference which is kind of disheartening given that there's no way those kind of low rent attractions will even service the 300 million bucks worth of debt that Kansas City has taken on . . . Additionally, it's also to scary that the former City Auditor is so clueless about the way the real world works that he'd even utter that statement . . . Even worse, a slim margin of misinformed voters believed it.

Followup: KC man couldn't get Des Moines ice cream truck ban repealed

I've always believed that people from KC like to create change and stir up controversy even if their well laid plans aren't always successful. Sadly (or not), the promise of ice cream couldn't even convince the folks in Des Moines to let a local dude sell ice cream on their streets.

The Des Moines City Council voted 7-0 to direct the city manager’s office to take a broader look at various types of mobile food vending citywide.

The action was spurred by a request put forth last year by Lawrence Williams of Kansas City, Mo., to consider lifting a 40-year ban on ice cream trucks.

Additionally, it should be noted that the guy didn't do himself any favors by violating the ordinance first and then asking for it to be changed . . . A tactic he must have culled from Kansas City's vibrant and thriving (illegal) immigrant community . . . Nevertheless the guy wasn't successful and now Des Moines won't get to enjoy a KC tradition: Watching overweight kids run after ice cream trucks or casually pointing out how said trucks don't sell their sugary treats on the Eastside anymore after being knocked over too many times in much the same way that you can't get pizza delivered in East KC either.

White elephants fight in KC

The Star reports: Unless the city and the station come to an agreement over the Kansas City Museum — and the deadline is next Tuesday — Union Station is in danger of losing its professional accreditation, station officials say. And that could lead other traveling exhibits to bypass Kansas City.

P&L District Propaganda

I don't know why I haven't seen the preceding video before but it's basically a pipe dream scenario for the P&L District in which the whole course of segregation, social structure, transit and commerce are changed because somebody builds a Limited and a few chain restaurants downtown. It's a nice image and the CGI reminds me of that old pre-roll commercial that they used to run before showing movies on HBO. It was encouraging and often made me overlook the fact that the channel played the Beastmaster everyday for 3 years when I was a kid.

Also, here's another nice computer animated clip featuring the song "Big Rock Candy Mountain." It basically expresses all of the same sentiments of the Cordish company video without the annoying announcer in the background or without placing this town's economic fate in hands of folks who are counting on hordes of people returning to the urban core in order to see the same movies and eat hot wings at the same places available in the suburbs.

Enjoy!!!

SW Trafficway slowdown coming soon

KSHB reports: Southwest Trafficway, between Interstate 35 and 31st Street, will undergo rehabilitation starting April 27.

Keeping things under control at KC Schools

Yesterday afternoon police officers said they were forced to subdue a student at Southeast High School with a Taser gun and pepper spray on Tuesday morning.

Apparently, the student was angered after he was stopped and asked questions . . . Therefore, in at least one respect . . . As far as getting maced and dragged away to jail . . . KC Schools are finally offering their students a glimpse into what life is going to be like when they're finally let loose on the streets of KC.

Fewer places to keep crazies in KC

KCUR reports that a shortage of mental health providers in Kansas City is forcing other unofficial organizations to pick up the slack. In other words, local nutjobs will either be on the street, crowding prisons or standing next to you in a crowded elevator thanks to cutbacks going all the way back to the Reagan era when the greatest President in the history of our nation made sure that an especially cold winter would solve a Midwestern city's homeless problems.

TKC's horrible mental image of the day: Kit Bond gets behind Kay Barnes

Strangely, there have been quite a few nice things said about Mayor Kay recently from Show-Me State Republicans. Compliments from Kit Bond are just the latest good quotes from the local GOP directed toward the soon to be former mayor. However, I think it's all a ploy because they know that Rep. Sam Graves will make easy work of her . . . And I only wonder if the old broad can see through the transparent remarks since she has certainly had experience with people wanting (and getting) tax breaks by buttering her up . . . Ew and now all this horrible imagery makes me want to throw up.

Folks camp out for confusing game show

For some unexplainable reason KSHB offers footage of really bored local folks lined up and even camping out for an open casting call for the show Deal or No Deal in Kansas City, Kan. Monday night.

And while I like the show's premise - competing against an invisible banker that's working against you (Illuminati in the house!!!) - I don't think I'd bother to compete on the show because I've never seen anybody take home a huge amount of money and host Howie Mandel is probably such a germaphobe that I wouldn't get a chance to offer a stink palm to him after I lost.

On the subject of Fort Riley Fatalities

KCTV 5 reports that two more Fort Riley soldiers were killed in Iraq. I regularly come across similar (read: identical) stories but I don't always link them. Recently, reports of Nine U.S. soldiers killed in an Iraq suicide attack make me realize that there isn't going to be a stop to any of these headlines anytime soon. And while I won't always post the articles on this blog . . . Rest assured that seeing them every single day is more than enough proof to realize that whatever the latest strategy proponents of the war in Iraq are pushing . . . It simply isn't working.

Peanut owner pushes forth effort to kill waitstaff with second hand smoke

At least Mike Marrow is brave enough to admit that the smoking ban in Lee's Summit is costing him money and hurting his business . . . It's a strategy that's a lot more honest than talking about personal liberty or small government . . . Anyway, he wants a jury to decide whether or not his workers should be exposed to hours upon hours of second hand smoke . . . And sure, they could get other jobs but none with as much hipster cred as working for the purveyor of hip-hop and hot wings.

MONDAY NIGHT KCK SHOOTOUT!!!

Police said an officer shot and killed a man after he tried to drive away . . . Dragging the officer . . . from a traffic stop on Monday night.

New Bartle Ballroom

Once again, one of the folks at over at the KC Rag Forum scoop the local media in providing a view into another one of this town's pricey attractions.

Featured above is one of many shots inside the new Bartle Hall Ballroom.

I won't point out that it'll probably stay just as empty as it is now considering that there's not much parking in the surrounding area unless folks booking black tie events want to hoof it down Broadway and maybe throw some change to one of the bums waiting at the intersections . . . But I digress . . . It's another beautiful (empty) building and that's what is really important for the well being of this City.



Also, don't forget to admire the stupid artwork out front which this City (i.e. you) proudly pays for as well!!!

UPDATE: One last thing: While I like the photos on the KC Rag Forum a lot more . . . Here's the Star Story which isn't nearly as easy access and doesn't contain still . . . You'd think the folks who are behind the Bartle expansion would put out a better press packet to tout the 150 million buck investment.

Show-Me how to go bankrupt faster than addicted folks in Kansas

Senate Majority Leader Charlie Shields wants to raise taxes on casinos and repeal loss limits. Shields says Missouri casinos face new competition from Kansas.

"Topuka"

A pretty (hilarious) review of Topeka from local blogger JustCara.

Blogger Backtalk: Toilet Humor

Here are two great takes from local bloggers regarding one of many tragic utterances by Sheryl Crow . . . This time concerning toilet paper:

From the X-Man: "I Hate Hypocrisy"

From Irish KC: "We're Going To Need Another Square"

Personally, I haven't liked anything that's come out of her mouth since "All I wanna Do" in 1993, think long and hard about it and you'll probably come to the same conclusion.

Nothing new in KC

Here's a photo of what seems to be the old school version of light rail in Kansas city. The photo features one of the lines from the old Kansas City Cable Railway circa sometime in the late 1800's. You know, the good old days when minorities weren't allowed to speak to a white dude without holding their hats, cowering and looking toward the ground.

Anyway, to me the image points out that there's nothing new under the sun and this town's light rail ambitions are simply another rehashed idea that this city has already dealt with and determined that it wasn't worthwhile. Couple that with the fact that believing people from Johnson County will cough up one dime for the effort is silly. In every sense of the word, that community only wants a free ride from KC.

Finally, the last thing I like about this photo is that reminds me that advocates of public transportation are really just living in the past . . . A more productive effort would be to work on flying cars or some other cool item that hasn't been invented or isn't widely available yet like camera phones only more practical and used for something besides blackmailing ex-girlfriends.

Another futile effort to make KC drivers stop acting like A-holes

I don't know how writing tickets is going to make people nicer on the roads but if that logic works for most area police departments I guess I'll try to be more mellow behind the wheel. KSHB reports: "The campaign is called "Destination Safe" and runs through May 6. Police will be out looking for drivers exhibiting risky driving behavior and they will be issuing tickets."

Mike Sanders thinks the solution to every problem is putting more people in jail

Obviously, when folks in this area elected a former prosecutor they probably should have guessed that his answer to every problem would be to put more people in jail . . . And historically politicos have always been able to earn easy points by supporting the prison industrial complex. Today, County Executive Mike Sanders proves that he's no exception as he hops in bed with a prominent Republican in order to make sure a greater percentage of people (of color) in KC are locked up.

County Executive Mike Sanders and U.S. Rep. Sam Graves toured the Jackson County Detention Center at 13th and Cherry streets in downtown Kansas City and then held a news conference to talk about cooperating on a new jail.

Sanders said the downtown jail is overcrowded and that a new jail serving the county, Kansas City and some other municipalities makes sense. Sanders said revenue bonds rather than a tax increase would pay for the project, though there are no specific plans.

And if locking more people up helped to reduce crime I'd wholeheartedly support it but over the long haul it really doesn't . . . In fact, the nice new jails that help spark political careers usually end up as a training ground of sorts for future generations of criminals. Finally, I'm not sure how I feel about KC being the warehouse for all of this state's criminals, I thought East St. Louis fulfilled that capacity in sort of a of a free-range kind of way.

Sebelius controls KU hospital

The KC Biz Journal reports that the lady governor of Kansas knows best when it comes to what local med students should study: Gov. Kathleen Sebelius on Monday vetoed a budget proviso that gave the University of Kansas Hospital board veto power over proposed academic and research affiliations between KU Medical Center and Saint Luke's Hospital of Kansas City.

Sadly, they couldn't jumpstart this guy

Police are investigating after a man's body was found in a garage behind a house in the 1100 block of Central Avenue on Monday.

Students are packing heat this Spring

Police said a handgun was recovered from Olathe South High School on Monday.

Crown Center crime!!!

Okay, I guess I have to believe some of the hype regarding the "downtown renaissance" considering that more crime is coming to the area . . . It's not exactly a good sign but more stickups, robberies and beatings mean that KC's long lifeless downtown area is truly showing signs of activity. A recent robbery at a Crown Center pet store is just one sign that people (to rob) are really coming back to urban core. Good times!!!

A Bastardly Review of Kansas City

Okay, this may not be a big deal to you but I'm very impressed with this town today given that we've just been given a short review by the author behind one of my favorite celeb bashing sites "The Bastardly."

Apparently, the guy was in town and caught a glimpse of (what appears to be) James "J-Wizz" Hathorn dancing up a storm. It seems that he was impressed even though Plaza merchants and local business people might refer to the dancer as "Visual Blight." Here's the thing . . . The blogger behind the Bastardly was good enough to post some video of his brief interaction with the KC mini-celebrity AND THEN he only briefly mentioned bbq, the Plaza and all the other lame stuff the tourists partake when they come into town. Talk about share of mind!!!

Anyway, I know I was impressed with this City now that we've been named in one of the top star watching blogs on the Internets. Also, here's the video the guy captured of the Plaza breakdancer who he has subsequently re-named "The Kansas City Dancing Machine!!!" I couldn't agree more . . . Check it:

Jolie Justus: Crazed clam bumper or principled carpet cleaner?

Today, Steve Kraske turns in an excellent account over the recent controversy regarding funds for a UMKC pharmacy school building that were cut because freshman Missouri State Senator Jolie Justus couldn't come to a compromise.

Here's how Kraske calls it:

She could have done both those things (vote against the plan and decry the governor's empty promise to promote the life sciences in KC) and still gotten $15 million for an expanded pharmacy building for the University of Missouri-Kansas City — smack-dab in Justus’ district.

Instead, Justus went a step further. She took to the Senate floor to filibuster the plan in a bid to kill it outright.

For Republicans, that was going too far. So in a rare act of public retribution, the Republican Senate passed the building plan but eliminated the $15 million pharmacy building.

Now Justus stands before her district empty-handed.

Personally, I don't know how to tackle the subject because I believe that all women in power are dangerous no matter what their proclivities. However, I will not succumb to any stereotypes about women based on their lifestyles while I should note that "compromise" is usually what ends up getting most hetero women in trouble when it comes to date rapes that evolve into 30 year marriages or any other kind of compromise where a broad ends up settling for a guy that her mother likes . . . But I digress.

So maybe a politico with penis envy (one of the many symptoms of lesbianism) is much better than the usual spineless folks who keep on getting stuffed into public office.

Note: I was going to title this post "Lesbian Fists of Fury" but I didn't want to disappoint people any more than usual when they visit this blog.

Anyway, I invite your opinion on this one . . . Because I just don't know: Is it better to fight a losing battle and end up with nothing or play the part of push over and come away with only crumbs?

This is just one of many subjects where I'm clueless . . . I guess I'm happy that Justus didn't taking it lying down from the folks who should have brought more funding for the life sciences to KC but on the other hand this town missing out on any kind of funding is unappetizing, not very fulfilling and kind of like a big tease . . . Very much like the sex scenes in the L word.

NFL crackdown on "character" could spell trouble for the Chiefs

Given that during the most successful seasons the Chiefs have had in recent years, they've also had their share of run-ins with the law . . . Now that the NFL wants to more tightly regulate the behavior of players, the Chiefs are going to have to change up how they go after new players. Solution: Recruiters should not only continue their rigorous interviews of current prospects but also focus on garnering players who can peacefully and quietly compile a list of bastard kids out of wedlock.

Can Jesus stop women from complaining?

The "no complaining" movement of last year led by a local church is continuing to pick up steam.

KC North pastor Rev. Will Bowen suggested his congregation wear purple bracelets to remind themselves not to complain. Since that time:
•People from nearly 80 countries have asked the church for 4.5 million bracelets. Bowen has appeared on “Oprah” and NBC’s “Today,” as well as radio programs in the United States and Great Britain. He gives five to 10 radio and television interviews a week.

•People magazine, 70 newspapers and countless blogs have covered the story.

•The church Web site, which once averaged 85 hits a week, now gets more than 40,000 a week.

Thing is, I haven't noticed any difference and I'm pretty sure that people complain more than ever. A better example would have been ear plugs to prove that you can't change the world but that doesn't mean the search for inner peace is futile but I guess that would be too reminiscent of buddhism to earn the blessing of most followers of the Big JC. Also, I'm not sure that keeping quiet is the most productive message to put out there for Christians . . . Still, like most of the church's teachings it makes for fascinating copy but doesn't really offer a practical way to deal with the world.

The Eight and 1/2 wonders of Kansas

Hendricks posts some cutesy column about a local contest to come up with "the 8 wonders of Kansas."

However, here are my suggestions for the 8 and 1/2 wonders of Kansas or at least what I'm vaguely familiar with about the state.

1/2. The remaining Native American population of the state don't really like Mexicans either . . .
8. The drive across (and out of) the state is long and boring but still rewarding.
7. Every town has a distinct strange smell all its own.
6. Kansas is the only state that refuses to get the "Friends of Dorothy reference."
5. There are more family owned Mexican restaurants in the state than some parts of Guadalajara.
4. Hookers on State Avenue were recently awarded "Hardest Looking" prize by an international association of pimps. The hos mistakenly assumed the prize read: "Hardest working." Everyone is too scared to correct them.
3. Overland Park Mall is the most accurate financial indicator for this nation's economy. Bull markets can be predicted by judging how many shopping bags JoCo housewives are carrying.
2. The intentional mispronunciation of Arkansas City is the state's longest running joke.
1. Remarkably and luckily broads at KU aren't very picky.

Gary Lezak gossip online

If you're a glutton for misinformation and the anonymous postings of a great many of this town's media professionals . . . The Gateway City Message boards have the "goods" regarding Lezak's new home out South which is allegedly worth hundreds of thousands of dollars, some of the recreational hobbies that may or may not be going on in the new pad AND some body language interpretation which probably doesn't prove that Jack Harry hates Lezak.

Lady with knife shot by Olathe cops

Fox 4 reports that a woman wielding a knife was shot in the wrist and stomach in Olathe when she was confronted by police and moved toward them . . . The story didn't note if the police department has Tasers but it seems like a situation where it might have come in handy and I've always strongly believed that a less lethal option for police in suburban areas would not only benefit crazy people but also prevent any unfortunate accidents for people of color passing through.

Proof: KC's suburban drivers suck

The Star highlights the most dangerous intersections in the metro area. They're all in the suburbs which may or may not prove that white people are panicky even after they've done everything to avoid this city's minority community.

Here is the list of the most dangerous intersections in the area:

Most dangerous street intersections

119th Street and Strang Line Road, Olathe

23rd Street and Missouri 291, Independence

103rd Street and State Line Road, Kansas City-Leawood

Most dangerous freeway junctions

Interstate 435 and Metcalf Avenue, Overland Park

Interstate 70 and Interstate 435, Kansas City

Interstate 435 and U.S. 71, Kansas City

It pays to placate the white man!!!

All right . . . It doesn't matter that Jason Whitlock is most likely the worst writer in any print publication representing a major metropolitan area . . . On the other hand, I like the fact that he doesn't seem to take his job very seriously AND he is rumored to have a penchant for hanging out with skanky broads. All of this is gully and a good reason to admire any sports columnist.

But what I like even more is that he's taking his game to the proverbial "next level" by becoming an apologist for the sensibilities of white people. Nice!!! Accordingly, in what seems like a pat on the head for speaking out against the shakedown tactics of Jesse Jackson and Al Sharpton, Whitlock just recently interviewed for the job of recently ousted Imus.

According to Richard Prince’s Journal-isms column, the news was reported Friday on the paper’s Web site. Kansas City Star's Jeffrey Flanagan wrote: "Word spread along the East Coast on Friday that Kansas City Star columnist Jason Whitlock interviewed with radio station WFAN's operations director, Mark Chernoff, about — you guessed it — replacing the fired Don Imus. But Whitlock said he was cool to the idea.

Yeah, while Whitlock probably isn't going to take the position (ew - sorry for that horrible image) it's just another sign that the best (i.e. most profitable) thing to do in any situation is to blame Black people for their own problems even if the the discussion is of a completely unrelated topic regarding derogatory language used by white guys in the mainstream media. Put simply, PR is profitable and nobody ever went broke telling people what they want to hear . . . Which is not only the reason why Whitlock's writing regarding the Imus incident is was so well received but also why one of Kansas City's most celebrated authors is now soon to be picking up a check regularly from the Mayor's office.

And if Whitlock is so disinterested in the job, then why bother to interview? Obviously, the guy is playing people in this town once again . . . And personally, I appreciate this kind of ploy because over time it's been shown to work. Finally, if blaming Black people for the discrimination they face is enough to earn accolades and career advancement then I think things are looking up for me as well . . . Since I'm all about painting with broad strokes and I have no problem whatsoever with portraying Jesse Jackson, Al Sharpton and the antics of a few dimwitted cRappers as an accurate representation of the entire Black community . . . Actually, I think I understand the strategy even more than the average bloke given that every video clip that accompanies talk of Latinos usually features the same set of desperate Mexican guys jumping over the border fence illegally.

Mixing blood and bone in KC

The University of Kansas Hospital and the Kansas City Cancer Center will combine their blood and marrow transplant programs into a single program beginning July 1. The collaboration would create the largest blood and marrow transplant program in the metropolitan area.

Going Crazy in KCK!!!

Apparently, all hell is breaking loose in KCK. Here is the tasty headline evidence:

Body found in car in KCK

1 killed, 1 injured in midnight KCK shooting

And authorities suspect arson in a recent KCK house fire the killed one person and injured another.

So, not only am I going to be really careful when I go to Go Chicken Go this afternoon but that'll probably be the extent of my precautions.

Latinos in Wichita are underrepresented even worse than here in Kansas City

There are no Hispanic members on the Sedgwick County Commission, the Wichita City Council or the Wichita school board, even though Hispanics are the city's largest minority group at just under 10 percent of the population . . . Odd because that's basically the way that Kansas City looks as well despite some pretty clever window dressing. And while the Funkhouser administration is at least aware of "The Black Part of Town" despite some unfortunate phrasing . . . I haven't heard any significant mention of the fate of this city's Latinos from his camp and we'll most likely see just the average, run-of-the-mill appointments of a few La Raza Political Club cronies and probably no significant increase in employment despite KC's Hispanic community supporting the mayor-elect by nearly a 3/4 margin. Really, from the looks of his campaign staff with only two exceptions: It wasn't "diverse" (ugh) in the least bit and really only comprised of two tokens and a ton of white liberals so it's easy to see that the whole "regular folks" pose was really just a code word for white people . . . Which is fine by me and isn't surprising . . . In fact, the only thing that shocked me was that the normally hyper critical local blogosphere bought the cleverly crafted catchphrases hook, line and sinker.

Chiefs fire sale: The former greats must go!

In what seems to be a good move . . . The Chiefs are looking to clean house and gain some more draft picks. First on the list is perennially unhappy Larry Johnson. Who knows what they'll get for him considering that his numbers overall are good but he can't play in the clutch and has noted that he's only really comfortable with a Black coach.

New Blog: Law School Bound

Here's a great new blog from a lady who goes by the handle of KC Sponge and describes herself as "a Kansas City import who loves this city." She's been leaving some great comments on some of the more popular local blogs and if her "first post" is any indication of her writing ability . . . She's worth watching. Check her out.

Hoping KCragwalk isn't as nasty as it sounds

Running with the bulls is for pussies . . . Spring his here and it's time to walk with the bloggers.

Local blogger Scooter J is organizing a non-sexual group endeavor (damn!) that will not only provide a nice close-up glimpse of Kansas City but also help you to walk off all that damn winter weight. It's called KC Rag Walk, the course will take walkers from the City Market to the Plaza and back. The long walk will go down the morning of May 12.

Actually, it seems like a great idea and the walk doesn't seem as strenuous as Scooter's last trek from Liberty to Olathe . . . Still, I don't think I'll be joining them but I will be waiting for the participants to post the photos they took along the trip and bring me some donuts on their way back.

Local model Lissa

Originally from Peculiar, Missouri . . . 22 year-old local model Lissa is just starting her modeling career her in Kansas City.

She also has a myspace page which reveals that she's a pretty imaginative graphic designer as well.

She seems to be doing pretty well in her endeavor judging by a recent cover on which she was featured this month.



This motorcycle mag was promoting a recent show here in KC and also features more photos and a brief interview with local model Lisa.

The TKC Saturday Night Podcast: Music that reminds me of the prom

Okay, this won't surprise you at all but I never went to my high school prom. It's not because I was a nerd in high school (looking back, everyone was) but due to the fact I was a genius given that I already realized that there was no reason to shell out all that kind of serious money in order to make some broad temporarily happy . . . Well, all that and (just like now) I was broke. Full disclosure: I did go to a quasi-high school prom but it just wasn't mine and I'd like to forget about the whole thing given that I was in my late twenties at the time . . . Kidding. Seriously, I would have never done something like that . . . I think I was only 25 and only a one year older than the especially dimwitted broad who invited me to one of the saddest of the GED program traditions you could ever imagine. Good times!!! Also, I feel kind of weird writing about the prom because I was never interested in it when I was in high school and I don't like having to share the street and endure all of those dorky over-indulged kids on The Plaza nowadays celebrating their long journey toward middle management . . . I have no idea how the broad who filmed Prom Night in KC got through the whole documentary without feeling remarkably old and unseemly.

Anyway, today the Star is running some silly article about a local high school prom which reminds me a lot of those infamous "ghetto Prom" photos which have been responsible for getting so many people fired because the links to the photos are usually accompanied with . . . How to put this . . . Insensitive comments.

So, your mileage may very but to me "the prom" is typified by the monster ballad not only because those kind of songs tug at the heartstrings but also because the tunes are trite, simplistic, manipulative but still hold a special place in your heart . . . I'm assuming. Additionally, the horrible R&B songs on the following list are the best of the garbage my friends and I were listening to during my Senior year of high school. Ugh. (Which could also explain why half of the broads I graduated with were preggers or just about to be . . .)

So I want to thank you for reading this week, hope that you have a fun and safe weekend and invite you to share in these horribly sentimental tunes:

Ya'll make me think

Thanks to Logtar (who I need to link along with KC Sponge) who bestowed upon me (no homo) . . . The thinking blogger award.

I don't usually participate in meme stuff but this one seems like a unique opportunity to tag some local bloggers (ew) and remind you to give them a read.

Again, a special thanks to Logtar and a reminder that you should add him to your daily readings and also a note that I'm gonna try to include blogs that I don't think get enough attention on the following list so don't feel hurt if you weren't included.

Here goes . . . Bloggers who make me think:

The Kansas City Post - This is Mark Forsythe's new hangout and he's posting some pretty great insights into KC's political scene. Check out the page if you haven't yet . . . He's already garnered a loyal cadre or readers who leave comments and I'm sure they'll be even more discussion in the future.

Biochemical Slang - He's not a local but if you've read him you'll realize that the guy behind this blog is soon to the next in line to stand with Byron Crawford and Dallas Penn when it comes to urban, hop-hop, (young Black guy bloggers). Seriously . . . For more than a few weeks he has impressed me with some thoughtful and consistently good content.

The D Rules!! - What's not to like about this guy? Nothing, that's what. Read him and tell him I sent you and then go get me some snack cakes.

The Flogging of America - Again, lots of great posts over here and a pretty powerful perspective (for a woman - hehe). There's no denying that the women who post on this blog are deep into KC political scene (ew) . . . Most definitely a blog you should check out if you haven't already.

Finally, I want to send a brief hello to Happy in Bag I used to link him all the time but then I decided that he was too good and would take away all of my traffic so I CUT HIM OFF . . . Not really but his brief, daily insights about this town are always fun to read and he's a rare blogger who has shown that he can come up with great content every day without getting obsessive about the whole thing. The same thing goes for LMC, Three o'clock in the morning and evolution who are also in my must read category but I don't want to give them too much credit or they'll think I'm going soft (no Cialis).

The AEG arena monopoly in KC

Anschutz Entertainment Group is now poised to take control of Kemper Arena as well . . . Which I guess makes sense since it would be the cheaper alternative to the Sprint Center which they already own. The plan seems to be to run Kemper . . . Right into the ground seeing as the new Sprint Center already has priority. It's a great plan which predictably doesn't do much for consumers of entertainment in this town seeing as the added cost will be passed right along . . . And then there's the whole topic of parking which gives Kemper a distinct advantage but nobody planned that far ahead when convincing the Sprint Center . . . Luckily (or not) the Sprint Center doesn't have an anchor tenant and there doesn't seem to be one on the way so there's no rush to figure it out.

Scaling back in Johnson County

While the powers that be in Kansas City seem to think that a town crawling with real estate developers and ponzi schemes is what's best for the community . . . Plans for the project to replace Mission Mall have been dramatically cut back. Formerly, it was supposed to be some ultra-new mini town with a tower and condos and maybe a few dancing clowns and racing stripes . . . Now it seems like a glorified strip mall. Here is what's changing:

•The 16-story hotel-condo tower will become a six-story hotel with 150 rooms.

•1.4 million square feet of floor area will become 771,170.

•The number of residential units will shrink from 350 to about 145.

•An office tower also will be scaled down to six stories.

•Parking spaces will go from 3,400 to 2,238.

•The summer 2008 completion date has been pushed back to November 2008.

Dead Sea Scrolls exhibit sells tickets

Apparently, Union Station has surpassed expectations by selling 150,000 tickets to the Dead Sea Scrolls exhibit with three more weeks to go till the end of the exhibit.

They still haven't settled the Civil War in Olathe

The Star reports that deep in the outskirts of KC there will be 650 re-enactors for afternoon battles, period music, demonstrations and historically appropriate games for the white kids this weekend in KC's scariest (to me at least) suburb.

UMKC bows to NAACP: Discrimination only matters when it happens to Black people!!!

It's not like I expect anyone to fight for the cause of local Latinos other than Latinos and I realize the the Black community has their own set of problems when it comes to higher education but what I've seen at UMKC is the folks from the NAACP and other local Black leaders COMPLETELY CUT OUT LATINOS when it comes to any discussion involving diversity or equality. Put simply: It's an all BLACK THING (nullus) when money, admissions or other juicy so-called entitlements come into play. The news of the latest deal is pretty much par for the course and just a sign that neither UMKC nor the NAACP have bothered to step out of the 70's when it comes to "race relations" . . . Ugh.

The University of Missouri-Kansas City promised Friday to do a better job investigating discrimination complaints, shaping a viable Black Studies program, and recruiting and retaining black students and professors.

The promises came in the form of a memorandum of understanding signed by UMKC Chancellor Guy Bailey and Anita Russell, president of the Kansas City branch of the National Association for the Advancement of Colored People.

Again, in all of the deal making done by middle-class Black leaders what I've seen is that they simply don't care to hear about how UMKC grossly under represents the local Latino community and how their staff and their student base is comprised of International students (read: rich) South Americans and the like which they try and pass off as a diverse community which (mis) represents Hispanic involvment while students from traditionally Latino areas in and around KC have consistently avoided the place like the plague and would much rather enroll at Rockhurst college (way more expensive) than participate at a school that not only ignores local Latinos and their issues but also promotes professors like Kris Kobach who are actively seeking to get a lot of Hispanics and their grandmothers deported.

So I'd like to congratulate my old college on their new deal . . . If paying shakedown money to the loudest group of complainers who could care less about real diversity is the way the University wants to go . . . Then they'll get exactly the kind of college they deserve . . . One that is neither diverse or inclusive and relies on the same old stereotypes and methodologies which have made it a school of second choice for so many students in the area.

If casino gambling doesn't drown you financially, it will sink you in one of many other ways

This is not to say that I haven't lost my fair share of nickels and quarters at the local boats but by and large I've always known that casino gambling is for suckers. If you're a regular casino patron . . . You're either going to waste precious money and time, meet the wrong local skank, get ripped off by the many dregs of humanity who frequent those places or eventually gorge yourself to death at one of their cholesterol heavy buffets. Put simply, there's not a lot of positive ways to pass the time at the casino and whether they admit it or not . . . Kansas City's Casinos are simply places that profit from addiction or people who don't understand the way probability works i.e. ignorance.

Here's the latest local tragedy at The Isle of Capri otherwise known as "KC's Ghetto Casino" . . . A guy who was allegedly using a fake ID jumped into the moat in order to escape from their rent-a-cops and drowned.

A man who was fleeing from casino security drowned early Saturday after he leapt over a railing and into the water that surrounds the Isle of Capri, authorities said.

Police said the man was being questioned about possibly using a fake identification card before he ran. Authorities were called around 12:30 a.m., and firefighters recovered the man's body about 45 minutes later.

This is the second time in two years that this has someone has flung themselves to their demise in the Isle of Capri moat but I'm guessing that gamblers barely looked up from their slot machines in order to take notice . . . That whole varied stimulus-response stuff is pretty powerful . . . In fact, seeing as though some people have theorized that the addictive nature of gambling is actually supported by the brain's chemistry . . . It's no wonder that few people note the rise of personal bankruptcies in nearly every town that gets in bed with the casinos.

Moffit in the Morning?

Venkman over at KC Talk reports: "KYYS morning jock Larry Moffit will be moving to 101 The Fox mornings starting this Monday. Larry will be hosting the show with long-time KCFX jock Frankie"

"Enjoying the beer? Thank a KC firefighter."

Local blogger Ed spys some of the wait staff at the recently reopened 75th Street Brewery sporting some supporting signage.

The Walls of Kansas City

Check out a FANTASTIC photo essay from Irish KC of local photography that thankfully doesn't include the Plaza or the Bottoms, the Boulevard or downtown.

Help a local bikini broad

If you know me (you don't) . . . Then you know that I'm all about helping young women achieve their goals as long as those goals involve looking really good, smiling pretty and maybe standing next to a shiny new car.

That's why I'm encouraging you to vote for 22 year-old local bikini model Valentina as she competes for the title of Ms. Bikini World. I don't know what the prize is but when a 5'11 broad in a bikini seems to need help I usually don't have too many questions.

The contest ends April 30th and not all (none) of the entries seem work safe but you may want to check them out over the weekend to get a handle (ew) on whether or not Valentina deserves your vote . . . She's got my vote not only because I'm in a FANTASTIC MOOD on the beautiful Saturday afternoon but also because I think life is about helping people and stuff and snack cakes.

Never too old to fight crime!!!

Here is an amazing story filed by Tess Koppelman: 53-Year-Old Rookie Joins Kansas City Police

It's really encouraging that the KCPD would be cool with letting an officer join up at an age when most people are starting to think about retirement . . . All things considered the story even cracked the hard shell of my cynicism. It's a pretty inspiring report given that the guy considered fighting crime on KC streets a lifelong goal.

Dude beats Dad in KC's best suburb!!!

KCTV5 (of course) reports: Police said 47-year-old Timothy Dubbert assaulted his elderly father as they drove down the interstate

People getting killed off on the Eastside faster than fossil fuel is disappearing

Channel 9 reports: Two men died in a shooting at a gas station at East 44th Street and Paseo Boulevard, officials said.

"Same arrogant pomposity" at The Pitch

I didn't even bother taking apart the Pitch this week not only because it's even more pointless than arguing with a pothead but also because local blog The Flogging of America did it much better than I could have . . . Check out all of the errors and lack of legwork she finds in just one article.

Threatening

KCTV5 reports: Three teens have been charged with making terrorist threats, said an official from the 16th Judicial Court.

It's so Fresh!!!

Check out Present Magazine for local Farmer's Market links.

Parents just don't understand

Parents with kids in schools at less than half capacity prove that they don't know anything about the changes the KC School District is undergoing . . . Namely that it's out of money and needs to cut back . . . Still, mix in crying and people talking about education and whining that "somebody needs to think of the children!" And you've got yourself a news story . . . However, with overall enrollment steadily declining for more than a generation, it's past time to shut some of these underutilized schools down.

Who has the best golf game in KC?

If golf is your bag (nullus) then you might find this upcoming local tournament interesting:

Christened the "Watson Challenge," the event is sponsored by Sprint Nextel and Cerner Corp. and tees off for the first time ever June 9 through 11 at Hallbrook Country Club in Leawood.

A mix of 48 links professionals and amateurs will compete. In order to take part, players must maintain a permanent address inside an eight-county region of the Greater Kansas City metropolitan area that includes Johnson County.

Forty of the combatants will qualify via their Top-20 ranking on one of two rating systems: the 2006 Midwest Section PGA Player of the Year list and Toyota Amateur Rankings.

Personally, back in the day I worked as a caddy and it wasn't anywhere near as fun as the movie suggested. I promised myself that I would never step foot on a golf course again after I nearly killed a 70 year old man who made a wetback joke while I was forced to wash his (golf) balls. NO HOMO!

Blogger/activist on KCPT WIR

If you're home right now, in about an hour check out KCPT's week in review not only will that limey dude have Funkhouser's rule bending wife on but more importantly local blogger and activist Alonzo Washington will be on the show as well. I'll probably check it out when it is rebroadcast on Sunday because I have beer to drink right now.

All eyes on Red Bridge Road

To me, the struggle over Red Bridge Road is tantamount to a fight for Kansas City's soul or at least what little is left of decent middle (to low) income neighborhoods in South KC.

Today at 10:30a.m., the Red Bridge Road folks are turning over to the City Clerk a petition stop the Red Bridge condemnation ordinance from taking effect until after the new City Council and Mayor-elect have taken over.

According to their newsletter, they received three times as many signatures required to file their petition but even more notably new 6th district council members-elect John Sharp and Cathy Jolly also signed.

So, we'll see . . . But one thing is for certain, these folks have done everything possible for what they believe to be the best interests of their neighborhood. I've lived in KC all of my life and I've noticed that most people in this situation simply move rather than work to get something accomplished. The Friends of Red Bridge Road are a great example of community involvement in Kansas City given that sometimes they were played, they made their presence felt in the media and they never stopped pestering people in power.

Mind you . . . None of this means that Red Bridge Road won't eventually be turned into a 5 lane highway but I just have to admire how these folks made a stand.

In KC and all over: Rich people feel entitled

A top secret report confirms what pretty much everyone in Kansas City already knew: Developers in this town are now completely addicted, dependent and demanding of tax incentives, sweetheart deals and all other kind breaks. Truly, this is the legacy of Kay Barnes as The Star has the details of this not so secret report by consultants:

A report quietly circulating at City Hall concludes that Kansas City should tighten its use of tax incentives by establishing a clear economic development plan, exercising stricter control of the review process and striking tougher deals with developers.

The draft study, obtained by The Kansas City Star, concludes that developers have come to assume that programs such as tax-increment financing or property tax abatements are an automatic part of any deal.

So, we've already covered the fact that these kind of breaks not only haven't created a boon of financial benefit for this city but also they're a hometown reminder regarding "white welfare" which is a subject that nobody really likes talking about . . . To be fair, it's not just real estate developers who have their hand out and all of this reminds me that over half of the people in this country are on the government dole . . . Which is just one of many reasons so many of us shouldn't be so judgmental when stepping over area homeless people or calling them "visual blight" - a phrase popularized to defend Plaza shoppers from the many pesky po'folk who comprise a greater percentage of people in this city than you'd ever want to imagine.

Rifles Stolen in KCK don't have firing pins

They're still worth 70k and they're antiques which means they're pretty much useless, unless the thieves are looking to rip off uninformed collectors.

KC's fake football team is pretty good

The Brigade - KC's local fake football team is off to a terrific start. They're 4-2 and their play is impressing the 3 or 4 dozen people who watch Arena Football.

KCPD cop calls it quits after sex scandal

The Star reports on a rare instance where an off duty police officer doesn't make things safer: A Kansas City police sergeant resigned Thursday amid accusations that he had sex with a 17-year-old student he met while working off-duty at Hickman Mills High School.

Sick: MO Republicans Slash Funding for the Future of the Healthcare Industry in KC

Now this story is boring so I'm not going to get into it but from what I understand Baby Blunt and all of his backers have not only shortchanged this Kansas City when it comes to a new pharmacy building for UMKC but also for future life sciences funding. Read the article for a more numbers and details

Here are the highlights that I picked out:

"they stripped out funding for an expanded pharmacy and nursing building at the University of Missouri-Kansas City and eliminated $31.2 million for a new cancer center at the university’s flagship campus in Columbia."

"the two projects were eliminated as retribution against Democratic Sens. Jolie Justus of Kansas City and Chuck Graham of Columbia, whose delaying tactics had prevented a vote on the governor’s entire higher education package."

"Justus noted that the UMKC project had started as a $12 million business incubator and a $3 million life science complex, both of which were highly sought by the business community."

"But the project was downgraded to an expansion of the pharmacy and nursing school because of opposition from groups who oppose medical research involving early stem cells."

I think Justus sums it up best in the following excerpt in which proves that even if she can't compromise, she's at least good for a quote: "It was announced as an economic development bill that would put Missouri on the map in life sciences,” Justus said. “Instead, it puts MoHELA at a huge risk and the projects have gone from laudable to just pork around the state."

Double Bonus if you giggled just a little bit when our openly lesbian representative said "pork around the state."

UPDATE: For a great discussion on this topic . . . Check out two highly traffic posts on "Freshmeat" the blog of freshman MO senator Jolie Justus.

Free & Fair Discussion . . .

Calling all Wonks -- MOHELA's Back (44 comments - Damn!)

Teenage home invader gets 5 year sentence

The Merriam kid who terrorized that neighborhood in 2005 reportedly gets justice according to a Star compilation of recent crime news . . . If he serves the full term (doubtful) that would still be less time than the U.S. is gonna spend in Iraq after liberating invading that country . . . Ironic. Don'tcha think?

Questions remain after KC triple shooting

After any shooting in urban areas, I thought the first question that's usually asked is how to blame the tragedy on hip-hop. KCTV5 reports: Police were still trying to determine what exactly led to a triple shooting that left one man dead. Investigators recovered at least a dozen shell cases from the scene at 61st and South Benton.

Blue Springs student may face charges of terrorist threats after comment in VT shooting discussion

A recent report from KCTV5 makes me overwhelmingly happy that I'm not in school given that many stupid things I say and write on a daily basis: "A student at the Blue Springs Freshman Center was suspended Monday after making a comment during a discussion about the recent Virginia Tech massacre." Unfortunately, no one repeats what the student says but we can all safely assume that if you disagree with a person in authority, you're most likely a terrorist.

In KC's ongoing "Kids killing Kids" news

KCTV 5 reports: Raymond Cage, 18, and 17-year-old Kwatez Sinton have been charged in a drive by shooting that injured a 3-year-old child.

Silly subsequent panic among area schools

The Star has a pretty comprehensive roundup of area schools overreacting responding to school threats in light of the scary fact that an Asian kid could kill a lot of people without even using Kung-Fu.

KCATA computer glitch enrages KC's crippled community almost as much as when I call them "crippled"

KSHB files one of those "Call for Action" type stories where they find someone the viewers can sympathize with and solve one of their many problems.

A new computer system created a major lifestyle glitch for disabled metro passengers. The disabled passengers got not only the run around as well as increased fares – as much as 13-times the normal fare.

Actually, this post was just an excuse for me to post a photo of the awesome ass Tank Chair. While I hope to have the use of my legs for all my life, if I ever did have to use a wheelchair I wouldn't mind getting into one of those things and maybe then I could be the first disabled person that KKFI didn't exclude with lack of accessibility.

Note: Actually, I'm just echoing a statement of a physically challenged guy who e-mailed me a few months ago regarding the KKFI issue . . . KKFI has always been inaccessible to me because I find the concept of community radio lame and I don't like stairs that much either.

Last meal in Overland Park

Dick Clark's American Bandstand in OP closes . . . It's not really news but I ate there twice and hated it both times.

Day care bites for reasons other than the fact that it's really expensive

Channel 9 reports: "A child-care worker is under investigation for biting a 3-year-old boy at a Shawnee day-care center, police said."

Mayor Kay's closing statements

She says Kansas City is in "pretty good shape" your opinions may vary once you get the credit card bill that she ran up. Also, the potholes aren't as bad when you're riding in the back of a limo.

Apparently, roving bands of Black guys aren't good for business if the closing of Bannister Mall is any indication

Maybe some of you from South KC can enlighten me but I remember Bannister Mall doing great business until it became stricken with the perception of being Kansas City's new Black Mall . . . And that's when everybody gave up on it.

Here's one of the things I've learned from my short and unsuccessful career in the field of communications: Perception = Reality.

A recent headline from KMBZ concluded the final fate of the place:

Bannister Mall Is Closing In Just Over A Month

Local blog Down the Byline posted his take on it from the perspective of a soccer fan who could be looking toward the chance of the place becoming the site of a future soccer stadium for the Wizards.

But I remember that for a short, brief moment . . . It was one of the most integrated areas of commerce in Kansas City . . . Until violence and rumors of violence along with the perceptions of so many people both justified and otherwise ruined the place.

BUT THEN AGAIN, maybe this topic isn't related to race at all (REALLY) and nothing more than proof that proponents of "The New Urbanism" are correct in their designs of shopping districts that replicate the feel of a downtown environment in a suburban setting . . . Yet somehow, all of the successful ventures in that arena (ahem, Zona Rosa) have taken place in white suburbs far away from minority communities.

But I don't claim to know it all . . . For one thing, I don't know how the P&L District is going to avoid the fate of Bannister Mall given that it faces the same perceived problem (i.e. proximity to the Black community) which so many people cite as a leading to contributor to the ultimate demise of the place.

Time to fill out your application!!!

Thanks to the Kansas City Post for informing us that it's a wonderful time of year in this town where patronage and political favors begin: It's time for application process for KC Boards and Committees under the Funkhouser Administration!!!

Put simply, this is where payback begins.

Things to watch for:

Mayor Funky has to make nice with "The Black Part of Town" or risk an immediate face off with the Eastside . . . Also, the scuttlebutt has it that Terry Riley is the first in line for Mayor pro tem but if they're going to make the position into an affirmative action deal then I say they should roll with the new and give it to Sharon Saunders Brooks (yeah!) since the new council is going to be fem dominated (ouch) and Riley's incompetence is quickly becoming the stuff of KC legend.

Will Mayor Funky support Hispanics in City Hall? I hear there is one kid who was the unoffical local Latino cheerleader for the Funkhouser campaign and I hope he gets a job out of it but according to the polls Funkhouser had more than 67 percent support among KC's Latino voters . . . And while I am the most prominent and important Latino in Kansas City it's important to realize that I'm not exactly representative of the majority of the this town's "salsa set" not only because I have a college degree (if we're counting UMKC) but also because I don't have a dozen children and I'm a master of "the language of the oppressor" while having only an intermediate understanding of Spanish that was largely honed in High School.

Now here's where all of the amazing political influence I have should pay off: It's time to appoint TKC as commissioner of "BRING BACK THE 40oz. back to KC!!!!" committee. Seriously, this is the only issue that matters to me - the only thing of importance as far as KC politics goes. Aggie Stackhouse forced my favorite containers of malt liquor (ew) back across the State Line years ago during her reign of terror and now it's time to bring them back. Obviously, I'll need a generous stipend and maybe a crown along with the title Grand Poobah.

Finally, I think it's important to note that the local Internets supported Funkhouser overwhelmingly even though less than one thousand votes with exceedingly low voter turnout marked Funkhouser's real world debut in KC politics.

So I'd like to encourage every blogger to apply for a position because paying off political debts is way easier than filling potholes and if Funkhouser is going to actively participate in KC's political scene he might as well learn that lesson early.

It's the growing season, I've got grass to cut but I like this sentiment

"I am not a lawn guy" is a pretty great blog post from local blogger Nightmare witch probably contains every bad feeling you've ever pent up about this Springtime ritual . . . Good stuff.

The silly "Second Life" version of the Sprint Center is complete!!! (and still empty)

Local blogger Emaw posts some photos from the popular waste of time online community Second Life . . . Not a real big surprise but the place still looks empty . . . Not even a virtual anchor tenant. Note: The Brigade don't count!!

A new career for Cara!!!

A recent post by local blogger Cara on the state of her career and how being a lawyer isn't really all it's cracked up to be is probably THE BEST thing written this week in the local blogosphere!!! If you're a fan of personal blogs, this is why you read . . . To catch a brief glimpse of what somebody is thinking at a critical point in their life. She's already racked up a bunch of comments . . . Now I'm gonna go wish her luck whatever she chooses!!!

"The War is Lost"

I'd have to note that it was a somewhat slow news week here in Kansas City . . . I know there was an attempt to relate the Virginia Tech Shootings to this town but it didn't really take, as far as I know UMKC is such a drab and lifeless institution that no student could possibly feel any more ignored or isolated than everybody else on campus and more than a few alumni I've spoken with acknowledge that the term "social life" at Kansas City's college applies only to bumping into someone unexpectedly in the parking lot on the way out of the commuter campus.

And I'm not noting that the horrible tragedy wasn't really horrible, just that I couldn't really relate to it coupled with the fact that in the same week of the massacre and subsequent media saturation more than 140 people were killed in a bomb blast in Iraq.

And that leads me to a recent statement by Senate Majority Leader Harry Reid who says that the "War is lost" which doesn't mean that it's going to stop any time soon but I guess it's a pretty clear indication of what path the whole endeavor is taking . . . And again, I don't want to venture a guess as to how all of these things could impact Kansas City but I suppose that mass shootings, the U.S. moving toward a cut and run strategy in Iraq and the prospect that we're moving closer to a society in which the only way we can all feel safe is to treat everyone with suspicion and as if they're capable of murder has to impact this town one way or another . . . At the very least I'm more intrigued about Korean culture (beyond lame jokes about their food and the stray dog/cat content), how to properly write the names of Korean folk and the somewhat unrelated fact that I don't think anyone but me has a right to have a gun.

Funkhouser's silence during sweetheart Zona Rosa deal speaks volumes

For those of you who keep track of campaign promises . . . The first one has already been broken as Mayor-elect Funkhouser lets one more TIF taxpayer subsidized deal go through without a peep . . . Even The Star points out that Funkhouser was NOTICEABLY silent when it came to a huge TIF deal in order to build a new street in the blighted opulent Zona Rosa area north of the river . . .

The City Council's rushed approval last week of a multimillion-dollar subsidy for Zona Rosa was appalling.

The council gave an overly generous public handout to a successful private developer so it could build a street to help expand the posh shopping district in a prime Northland location.

Mayor Kay Barnes refused to use her considerable power to at least temporarily delay the project.

Besides ignoring the logic of the citizens group she helped appoint, the mayor also ignored the will of Kansas City voters. Just weeks earlier they had elected Mark Funkhouser to succeed her in large part because he promised to more closely scrutinize tax-break requests.

Speaking of Funkhouser, although he doesn't take office until May 1, he knew about this project and should have spoken out and brought more attention to it. That would have been in keeping with his previous opposition to how special deals are slipped through City Hall.

I guess the guy is a quick study when it comes to politics, he knows that he better not do a thing to upset the Northland even if it means betraying all of those cheap campaign promises about TIF abuse and other lies that naive liberals begged Kansas City voters believe.

But I know you still don't believe me, so go and wait by all of those potholes that you think are going to get fixed and then try and remember back when Mayor Kay promised she would fix those things was well back in the days when she had more support than Funkhouser could ever imagine.

And even as The Pitch is belatedly running propaganda about "the end of political hitmen" in Kansas City; Funkhouser's silence makes it evident that he's willing to betray one of his key campaign platforms rather than risk upsetting The Great White North that was almost solely responsible for voting him into office.

It's just a sign of things to come . . . The Mayor-elect and his coven of supporters would rather talk bistate pipe dreams and plan the inauguration ceremony than take part in any real discussion of the very same issues he tricked this town into believing that he would take seriously.

Expensive cache of weapons stolen in KCK. Additionally, anti-gun control lobby missing credibility as well in light of recent events

The Star reports: A Montana rifle manufacturer returning from the National Rifle Association's annual convention in St. Louis reported that his truck and rifles worth more than 70K were stolen from a Kansas City, Kan., hotel.

Pharmacist gets 15 years for child porn

The Star reports: Prosecutors turned up the heat because he distributed child porn. But at Wednesday's hearing, they were “grandstanding,” the judge says.

White people on Plaza only care about abstract problems

Over the weekend some really great and granola smelling hippies staged some kind of environmental protest on the Plaza . . . I don't know exactly what they were pushing but there was a guy in a polar bear costume and a few Milfs that might have been into reliving their "Free Love" days.

Some people might credit these folks with standing up for Planet Earth but it's hard for me to give them any props for marching on a place that calls other human beings "Visual blight" as they scream about saving the polar bears or the manatees or whatever their favorite pet cause is this week that has almost nothing to do with people in this town . . . Additionally, I picked out some poor, sad woman holding a sing who thinks that bi-state funded light rail and gondolas are going to save the planet . . . Which not only proves environmentalists are insane if they think replacing empty buses with empty trains will do any good but also because no one in their right mind thinks that the people of JoCo want all of KCMO's minorities to have easy access to the better parts of the Golden Ghetto . . . Finally, it all just seemed like an excuse to socialize anyway . . . Which isn't all bad when you think about it because there are obviously a hell of a lot of ways to get a broad worked up when talking about melting icecaps and better gas mileage . . . I guess.

Sprint Center is screwed. Nothing is going to change the situation.

I have to admit, a recent news story about The Sonics maybe, possibly, could be, not really coming to Kansas City got me a tad excited (No homo) but then I thought that we're not talking about the Supersonics of my youth where every game brought the possibility of Xavier "The X Man" McDaniel throwing an elbow in the face of some unsuspecting rookie. Nope, the Sonics haven't had a decent team in years and unlike the Penguins . . . They aren't even pretending to be interested in Kansas City . . . Strangely, horribly and insultingly . . . Oklahoma City ranks above Kansas City in the unlikely event the team should decide to move.

Chronic gets some credit

I don't listen to indy music, I only listen to Yacht Rock and rap music made before 1992 but that doesn't mean that I don't appreciate what some of the devoted music fans are doing in Kansas City.

If you've poked around (no homo) the Internets and looked for links related to Kansas City music you might already know Chronic or his awesome endeavor over at Popfreeradio.com . . . However, those of you who rely on The Pitch to pick your playlist (God help you) may not be familiar with one the local internets best broadcasters until today. And while I hate to give The Pitch any kind of props at all (for anything other than somehow managing to be even more the ghey than CampKC) they did the right thing in picking this guy for a quick profile. Check it:

PopFreeRadio.com. It's comparable to KRBZ 96.5 (the Buzz) but fresher. Site founder Chronic the Hedgehog (real name: Justin Bale) of Overland Park prides himself on breaking songs — and bands — before the Buzz . . . True to its influence, Pop Free comes off endearingly belligerent and stoned. Chronic's own afternoon show, The Session, kicks off at 4:20 p.m. Eastern time (so he can celebrate the magic time with potheads nationwide). It's a three-and-a-half-hour hit of punk, hipster rock and KC bands such as the Architects, Shudder and the Republic Tigers.

And while all of those band names to me sound like different brands of personal lubricant . . . I'm still glad Chronic is playing them. Read the rest of the review for some lesser quality local Internet radio and then do your own research and find something that doesn't conform to the flock-of-seagull-haircut-emo-listening style propagandized by The Pitch.

Full Circle

I don't know why but I've been in a weird mood lately, it could be all of the talk of shooting and murder by some Asian dude that looks like half of the guys I bullied in grade school or it just might be that the chicken I ate earlier that just isn't sitting right . . .

Hammer Time (WTF?)



Who knows . . . But I will say that a lot of stuff that I'm reading on the Internet seems to be pretty contemplative and a lot better than usual . . . It's as if collectively, the everyone in the blogosphere seems to be stepping up their game.

Here is one example - Dallas Penn has published what I consider to be the best post by any blogger I've seen in months, the title alone is worth mentioning along with the fact that while the media is obsessed with one massacre there are so many more going on all over the world.

Check it:

BLACK YOUTH ARE DRESSED TO KILL…

And the following video clip comes way out of left field but I can't get it out of my head so I might as well share it with you folks. Recently, on College Humor I came across a hilarious video that's just a little bit bittersweet in my opinion.

You might have already seen it but the clip features a group of soldiers searching cars in what appears to be Iraq. The group must have been bored out of their mind because the soldier featured in the clip pulls over a car and does a DEAD ON Harry Caray impersonation and barely breaks character at all . . . Truly, the guy is talented and I guess the reason I find the clip fascinating is that for as much as people rant against U.S. involvement in Iraq or cultural and military oppression world wide . . . In the end, the will of mega corporations, the Illuminati, The Bush Administration, the Tall Israelis or the cult of Oprah is carried out by ordinary citizens that are on the streets of every city in the world. So either we're all innocent or we're all to blame for all the planet's suffering. I can't say which one yet . . . It depends on my mood. Anyway, if at some level we're all forced to be tools (hehe) for the hegemony or Wal-Mart or whatever there's no point in not having a good time . . . And the following video features guys just like the ones you might have known in college making the best of a quagmire that nobody will be able to explain 100 years from now.



For a point of reference . . . Here's Will Farrell doing the same bit a few years prior and asking a far more philosophically relevant question than I could ever devise.

Myspace of the moment: Local photog

In my never ending search for photos of attractive local women who are seemingly open to suggestion . . . I ran across something even more interesting.

Local photographer J.E. Johnson has a a great Myspace page which feature some amazing photos the guy has taken over the years.

Truly, the dude is a lucky man not only because he's obviously got some serious photog talent but also because he seems to know almost every hot broad in this city. Some guys have all the luck is damn right. Anyway, he was nice approve my friend request so i just wanted to return the favor by giving his page a plug (NO HOMO) and encouraging everybody who reads this blog to take a look at the informative photography tutorials he provides as well as the awesome imagery of local hotties.

UPDATED: Blogger Bash reviews!!!

So I heard last night was a pretty good party, a much better time than betting my Grandma's social security check in a game of online poker and a pretty important step for KC's blogger community.

And while I'm not a big fan of public gatherings because I'm a "withdrawn loner with disturbed writings" . . . I am anxious to read what "you people" are going to post about the party . . . Double Bonus points for any photos.

So far . . . Local blog General Blather is the first to come up with a recap. I like her take on the event a lot:

"It's refreshing to know that in a city full of idiots, you can find more than one person who can string together sentences to form intelligent conversation."

"overall i think it was a shitload of fun and it was so great to meet the bloggers."

"hanging with the cool kids"

"The blog meet was, in my humble opinion, a huge success. Much thanks to Greg and Michelle for organizing it."

"New friends were made, new blogs were discovered, and nobody was "outed" that I'm aware."

"I was the ugly fat guy with the yellow shirt"

"It was very cool getting to see the KC blogosphere in full effect last night."

Please fell free to add your link in the comments or e-mail it to me if you'd like . . . Hopefully, I want to add to this post later on in the day.

Update: Updated

Fear in KC area and all over . . . Cowering in the aftermath of shooting

These headlines prove to me that people watch too much TV and the media is the instituation that really provides all the instruction in this area when schools prove they're scared of their own shadow - It's just disheartening to see scribblings on a bathroom wall and an empty briefcase cause local folks to flinch:

Threat Forces Ridgeway To Cancel Classes

Briefcase Causes Lockdown At Lee's Summit High

Also, I don't know if it's because a great deal of my schooling took place in lily white and racist Catholic institutions but somehow I just can't bring myself to be afraid of Korean kids . . . Unless they're driving or challenging me to a game of Gears of War . . . Badump-bump-bump.

Maybe Mission will protect morons!!!

City of Mission to decide fate of payday loans

Taking a hard look inside Kansas City's 300 million dollar mistake

I found an interesting set of photos over at the KC Rag Forums earlier this morning.

As far as I know . . . It's the first look inside the utterly doomed (and wok looking) Sprint Center.



Still, there is no doubt it's a somewhat pretty (as well as silly) looking building with only one exception . . . Those dumbass yellow windows that appear every so often . . . But if downtown remains as desolate as it is currently . . . The local homeless bums should break those out quickly with no problem whatsoever.



Anyway, what's clear to me is that this is a sporting arena and it doesn't look like there is enough floor space for any decent sized convention to come through that wouldn't want the cheaper price at Municipal or Kemper . . . So it doesn't seem like there is much of a Plan B as far as this facility is concerned . . . And the building just seems to "classy" (pardon the expression) for the tractor pulls and other low money events that Mayor-elect Funkhouser has said might float the impending financial disaster of a building.



Anyway . . . With no anchor tenant and no word of one in the near or distant future . . . The fact that the Penguins publicly rejected Kansas City as someplace where yet another pro-sports team couldn't really turn a decent sized profit . . . It just doesn't look good for the future of this silly looking structure and the so-called urban renaissance it's supposed to bring about . . .