Celebrate Kansas City Eclipse 2017 Fake News



At the risk of seeming like a party pooper despite today's overwhelming disappointment . . . The total solar eclipse was possibly the least important "news" event that has happened so far this year.

Again, a quick rundown . . .

- They're killing cops in Westport and because the officer was African-American . . . That somehow makes Kansas City hipsters feel safer as our murder count inches closer to the century mark.

- Eclipse 2017 was ruined by rain that also backed up and flooded local roadways because Kansas City politicos LIED about fixing infrastructure with GO Bond money . . . Which is actually being used for a variety of pet projects.

- There's a war over monuments in Kansas City that persists as culture warriors battle for the heart and soul of this town whilst armed dudes confront crowds of local angry ANTIFA.

Nevertheless, most of today's news was about the middle-class eating fried food whilst watching the sky . . .

Best Timelapse Of The Day

And The City Went Dark

Photography Blog


Okay, Maybe The Sun Isn't Really Racist

The Atlantic Claims Monday's Solar Eclipse Is Racist

Return your solar eclipse glasses and cancel your sun-watching parties, America. According to The Atlantic, Monday's predicted total solar eclipse is, it turns out, racist.


Nice Neighborhood Party
Eclipse dodges storms, delivers for Northeast residents
Nearby Totality

Americans flock to St Joseph, MO to view total solar eclipse

A partial eclipse will be visible from anywhere in North America, but the path of totality covers only 70 miles across the U.S.


Kansas City Biz Class Look Upward

KC businesses deliver eclipse-viewing parties [PHOTOS] - Kansas City Business Journal

A variety of Kansas City businesses gave their workers quite a show on Monday afternoon. As a once-in-a-lifetime solar eclipse passed through the Kansas City area, some companies gave their employees time for some celestial bonding. Look through the attached slideshow to see some submitted photos from the different eclipse-viewing parties.


2-Star Foodie Eclipse

Spectators view eclipse at Chicken N Pickle in North Kansas City

KANSAS CITY, Mo. - On Monday morning the doors at Chicken N Pickle opened as the storm clouds rolled out. Nicole Bailey from Kansas City, Kansas and Rachel Corl from Mission, Kansas were among the 200 people who purchased tickets for the rooftop eclipse watch party.


Credit Where It's Due: The Timeless Johnny Rowlands Has Kansas City's Best View

Watch the eclipse totality from News Chopper 9

Johnny Rowlands had a 360 degree view of the phenomenon from the skies.


We'll leave this thread open but let us never speak of this again . . .

Comments

  1. Why, why would anybody celebrate the eclipse with gunfire?

    KC - You cray.

    ReplyDelete
  2. I drove all the way to St Jo, and it was raining and cloudy during the totality part. 50 minutes later, there were just scattered clouds, so I finally got to use the glasses to see something that looked like a French manicure. Just a departing slice.

    The weather forecasters totally blew their forecast today. They missed the mention of RAIN before 3pm.

    Glasses for sale. If you're young.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Tracy you are so beautiful and sexy.

      Delete
  3. The Truth of the Matter8/21/17, 8:22 PM

    Just think how many like Tracy where foolish enough to waste time and money for what...... nothing, that's what.
    If schools hadn't let out a cop might be alive today but I doubt it.
    Just goes to show all you fools, you can't always predict what the weather will do so you best have your act together and be ready for what ever it throws at you.

    ReplyDelete
  4. Maybe you should just kill yourself 8:22 instead of trolling a dead cop.

    ReplyDelete
  5. ^^+1. 8:22 is a broken, busted piece of shit. This is the only interaction he gets with other people, because everyone who knows him has shunned him. Loser. Get a life.

    ReplyDelete
  6. ^^^ and you are like Mr. Stable?

    ReplyDelete
  7. ^^I'm God to simps like you.

    ReplyDelete

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