The Onion Destroys Jackson Mahomes

Possibly the greatest satire in Kansas City Chiefs history . . .

Here's the "news" about an imaginary upcoming advert that might interest local biz . . .

The ad will reportedly be narrated by Chiefs quarterback Patrick Mahomes. “We know that Jackson Mahomes can strike at any time, and we want our customers to feel secure in the knowledge that this policy will cover them in the event of an extreme Jackson Mahomes, reimbursing any damage, injuries, and/or mental hardship caused by Jackson Mahomes for up to $50,000, particularly if those injuries or hardships are documented on TikTok.”

Read more via www.TonysKansasCity.com link . . .

State Farm Unveils Insurance Policy That Protects Customers Against Jackson Mahomes

BLOOMINGTON, IL-In an effort to offer a more competitive slate of financial protections for modern hazards, State Farm unveiled a new insurance policy Tuesday that protects customers against Jackson Mahomes. "Residents in the Kansas City area, as well as in cities where the Chiefs' divisional rivals play, are at high...

Related real news reading . . .

Overland Park restaurant at heart of Jackson Mahomes' legal case announces it's now up for lease

The restaurant at the heart of the legal case against Jackson Mahomes announced Monday that it is now for lease.


Johnson County restaurant at center of Jackson Mahomes criminal case closes for good

"We were so close to making it, then this whole thing happened," an employee said.

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