Sunday, December 13, 2020

Kansas City Porch Pirates Emboldened 2020

During harsh times and no stimulus coming soon, the season of stealing is surging in Kansas City.

Sadly, locals are forced to share crime footage rather than precious merch that was swiped by local crooks.

Check-it . . .

Porch pirate hits KC man's house twice; local police urging people to take precautions

KANSAS CITY, Mo. - Porch pirates are back at it again, except this time around a Kansas City man said the culprit was no stranger. "For the past 10 years I haven't had nothing come up missing," said William Bates, a Kansas City resident. But that's been a different story for Bates within the last [...]

13 comments:

Anonymous said...

WhitePeopleSteal.com

Anonymous said...

WhitePeopleStealFromBlackPeople.com

Anonymous said...

ChristopherColumbusIsAStealingWhitePerson.com

Anonymous said...

^^^ Everybody steals. You're an idiot.

You're being a thief right now trying to steal away attention for yourself.

Fortunately, you're just alienating more people.

Anonymous said...

I know, we are all too familiar with daily black crime that when a white person is featured the offended celebrate with the excitement of a pig riding rodeo at the state fair. I can envision Billy Porter in full drag on the back large fat pig hollering "white people steal!!!, yeehaw!!!". Is that how you feel?

Anonymous said...

I'd shoot that thieving bitch in the back, that'd teach her a lesson real quick.

Anonymous said...

Its biden getting an early start. White old men stealing from blacks.

Anonymous said...

Depends and life alert spokesman joe bidet says I’ve been stealing from the American public for 47 years now and you can’t stop me now!

Anonymous said...

Only 37 days till January 20th, @8:09... (snicker)

Anonymous said...

Well @7:36,

FIRST - you'd have to make it onto your feet,

SECONDLY - you'd have to find where Mommy hid Dad's rusty old .410,

THIRD - you'd have to hunt for the shells Mommy hid the last time a loud noise happened outside and you shit your size XXXL sweatpants and started screaming "Commies",

FOURTH - you'd have to make it up the basement stairs before the thief was twenty blocks away,

FINALLY - you'd have to hope the thief had her back turned when you finally got outside, because if you saw she was facing you, you'd drop the gun, piss yourself, and curl up in a ball on the ground sucking your thumb.

Anonymous said...

Not nice @8:37, probably correct, but not nice.

Anonymous said...

8:37 “stand your ground” remember that next time you have any foolish thoughts

Anonymous said...

Should be a home owners right to drop in their front yard or back for that matter anyone who steals from them. Let people deal with these thieves there soon would be a whole lot less of them and the others not going to risk getting blown all over someone's yard.