Thursday, July 30, 2020
RESOLVED: BRITTANY MATTHEWS IS THE FIRST LADY OF KANSAS CITY!!!
This morning we share a not-so-fun fact and something more interesting than the promotional faux controversy about a meaningless NFL listicle . .
A long, long time ago Kansas City had a mayor who let his wife meddle in his office. She ran around with bare feet and managed to single-handedly destroy an otherwise promising career. Her book is on Amazon and it omits nearly every interesting detail from her quick moment in the public spotlight that has now been almost completely forgotten. One factoid worth remembering: In an attempt to save her job, the former Mayor's wife billed herself as "Kansas City's First Lady" . . . The title didn't take but the idea persists.
NOW . . .
Kansas City Chiefs QB Patrick Mahomes enjoys this town's pathological hero worship that has ruined nearly every decent athlete to reside in this cowtown. Don't believe TKC??? Codependent KC fandom transformed Hall Of Fame hitter George Brett into a guy who relentlessly bothers other people about his poops.
Still . . .
We don't begrudge Money Mahomes his cash or the love of the public. In fact, there's more than enough admiration to around.
Accordingly and given that our mayor is "an avowed bachelor" with no plans to marry any time soon . . .
It is decided . . .
BRITTANY MATTHEWS IS NOW "THE FIRST LADY OF KANSAS CITY" UNTIL THE CHIEFS FIRST PLAYOFF LOSS OR HER INEVITABLE AND UPCOMING SPLIT WITH MAHOMES!!!
Don't be a rube, trades are a part of sports.
The mileage may vary but one or the other tragedy is pretty much guaranteed given that pro-sports is remarkably and universally cruel to women. And so we merely offer this humble gesture to secure Brit's place in local history given that her future billionaire beau hasn't bothered to put a ring on it despite all of the tawdry public canoodling.
Inq: Patrick Mahomes’ Girlfriend Brittany Matthews Flashes Her Booty While Giving Him A Kiss
AGO: 7 Interesting Facts About Patrick Mahomes’ Girlfriend Brittany Matthews
NY POST: Brittany Matthews calls out trolls after Patrick Mahomes kissing post
Developing . . .