Tuesday, February 04, 2020

TRACY SEYZ: OK BOOMER, MAYBE YOU'RE TOO OLD TO GO TO THE KANSAS CITY CHIEFS SUPER BOWL SNOW PARADE?!?!



Despite hope for a delay we learn a couple of cruel facts about the Super Bowl celebration . . .

Parade is scheduled regardless of weather conditions

And then . . .

Organizers: Moving Chiefs parade because of snow was never an option

In her unique style of prose our pal Tracy Thomas tells us . . .

Here's something nobody has anticipated--
ARRIVALS will be spaced out--some will go very early, etc.
Several round trips for each bus.
Takes an hour to Oak Park mall on a GOOD day!
Longer to Independence, etc.

But ALL will want to DEPART at the same time, from Union Station.

No way there will be enough busses then.
All the toilet paper will be gone.
You wont be able to phone your friends lost in the crowd.
You will be cold and your legs will ache.

And it's not like you can walk a mile north, back to 12th St. and duck into Macy's or Jones Store and shop for at least two hours.
#######

Update, The Pitch makes me laugh with their coverage written in bigger print . . .

How to watch the Chiefs parade without dying

We have a celebratory parade tearing through town tomorrow. Early estimates think we may be looking at up to a million people attending. NOT A THREATENING AMOUNT OF ATTENDEES AT ALL. Certainly helped by all the businesses whose HR departments have given up on the uphill fight of keeping folks in the office.


Developing . . .

9 comments:

Anonymous said...

Tracy is 100% correct, the days of Jones & Macy's were better suited to these crowds. Coffee shops and restaurants want to get people out of there to turn the tables.

It should be interesting.

Anonymous said...

Better off leaving the parade and going to a bar or restaurant for a few hours before heading home. Maybe even go to the downtown movie theatre and watch a movie for a few hours before heading home.

Anonymous said...

That is an absolute LIE to say moving it to Thursday was never an option!!!

Anonymous said...

There’s going to be a lot of drinking and drugging and fucking and fighting. Like 50 years worth, all in one day. Do not miss this unless you are a pussy or a homosexual.

Anonymous said...

Is there a section for Transgender fans ? Fans with one leg and native American heritage ? Black and Irish blends ? Certain areas of safe zones with LGBT rainbow printed reservation seats ? Only Mexicans for Bernie section ? Or Chief players children that are victims of child abuse and their mothers that are threatened ? Asking for the diving party.

Anonymous said...

Selfie Quinton wanted the parade on a snowy day so he could have KCMO's salt trucks, snow plows and pothole pansey brigade on display and posed for action along the parade route.

Anonymous said...

THEN DON'T GO, YOU DUMB BITCH

Anonymous said...

It's been well established on the TKC comments that geezers are too scared to go downtown to begin with.

Non-issue.

Anonymous said...

Media recommending you leash your child if attending.