And once again . . . Just when I thought I was out, they pull me back in.

I thought I was finished with Gloria Squitiro and Mark Funkhouser years ago after they abandoned Kansas City and moved to the nation's capital to help run some mag that policy wonks use to build their résumé.

Again, we never held any personal animosity toward either former Mayor Funky or KCMO 1st lady Gloria Squitiro. It was merely the job of TKC as the only INDEPENDENT Internets opinion outlet that really matters in this town to oppose one of the most grossly incompetent administrations Kansas City has ever witnessed. As always, our blog community lived up to the task and the Mayor never made it past the primary of his reelection and now helps teach other aspiring politicos from his mistakes.

Accordingly . . .


Apropos for #TBT, we offer a great many thanks to Dave for valiantly suffering through this seemingly self-obsessed memoir that chronicles part of local history that most voters would like to forget.


When I was approached by Mark Funkhouser to read an advanced proof copy of his wife’s new book, May Cause Drowsiness and Blurred Vision, I told him that I would be more than happy to. Now that I have read the book, I am upholding my promise to write this review.

If you say you live in Kansas City and have never heard of Gloria Squitiro then you have to be a recent transplant to this area. Gloria became famous in a negative way as the first wife of a Kansas City Mayor that was banned from her husband’s office. I heard all the stories along with some inside gossip from people that were friends of the Funkhousers during this time Mark was in office. But I pushed all that out of my mind as I dove into this book to quickly find out some of the stories that I questioned from the past may have had a lot more truth to them that even I would like to admit.

Gloria has a very in-your-face style of writing and nothing, I mean nothing, appears to be taboo in sharing with us. You do have to give Gloria an A+ for at least being honest in explaining her feelings, her trials and tribulations, as she in great detail lays out her life along with the whole family in the first volume of her memoirs.

Gloria’s first volume briefly covers her and Mark’s conversation on him running for Mayor of Kansas City and looking for an office to be his campaign headquarters. The rest of the book goes in to greater detail, in a “Dear Diary” kind of way covering the Funkhouser family European vacation. When I say that the book is a dear diary sort of format, it is exactly just that. You will read about things that a majority of the public would never ever share with anyone outside of a very, very, close friend. Very little shocks me at times, but I have to admit there were times I read things that shocked me in this book. I will not give those incidents away, I will leave that up to you the reader to find out for yourself all the things that I thought were just a little too TMI.

I have seen some comments of people saying they thought the book was humorous and funny and I’m not sure I agree with that, but I also think that this is a book the female side of the human race will probably enjoy reading more than the male side. But either way, if you followed the escapades of Mayor Funkhouser’s time in office and all the media hoopla that took place during that time, I have to suggest you do read this book. It may give you a clearer understanding of life in the Funkhouser family which I’m not saying is bad, but one needs to form their own opinion. To each their own is my motto and as long as you’re not breaking any real hard-core laws, all’s fair as I see it.

Out of a five star rating I will give this book a three. I think the book is very well written, very easy to read, but in total honesty, not really my kind of reading. But that does not make it a book you don’t want to read, it’s just not my forte. I’m sure many people will think this is a five star book and I will not argue against that, this is just one of those books you have to read for yourself and then decide on your own, where you stand.

Amazon affiliate link that actually helps TKC more than the former first lady . . .

May Cause Drowsiness and Blurred Vision: The Side Effects of Bravery (C'mon Funk Book 1)

You decide . . .


  1. Actually, Dave is right about a lot of things here, especially the fact that the lady is a heck of a writer.

  2. Is this available on audiobook,I have a free credit on Audible that's burning a hole in my Amazon pocket.

  3. I guess we will have to buy Byron a copy, we pay for all the rest of his stuff. He will be so pissed that he is not mentioned.

  4. 5:10 you idiot. It bring smiles to my face when I see retards such as yourself saying things that are not true. It just helps in letting everyone see you for the idiot you are. Anymore lies you like to share? Click on the Amazon link to see what is covered.

    1. But, there is, 5:22. Try reading the book like I did.

      Once you learn how.

  5. Oh, I'm good, thanks just the same.

  6. She "couldn’t believe that [she] was living in this backward, Podunk city.

  7. Byron. I /we will buy you a copy. Send us a PO Box or address. Will get it autographed if I can.

  8. This is hilarious but Super Dave is pretty spot on with what he is saying here, and the book may actually be a decent read during those early morning and late night sessions of giving a burial at sea to turd babies. I would give them first installment a whirl, and see if I would be up to proceeding on to read her fifty shades of political porn.

    I am no fan of the Funk-meister but Gloria was definitely the brains of the two. Old Lurch would stroll around all hunched over like an old hound dog awaiting his next command, but still better than the conniving, bowtie wearing stooge. I recall being asked to work on the Funk man's campaign years ago, but I declined. When approached, I found myself caught between laughing hysterically and being temporarily blinded by the bright orange campaign shirts, and the huge, older model, orange version of the Scooby Doo Mystery Machine with Funky's slogan all over it.

    Anyhow, Unlike others, I have heard her voice, so I may have to opt out of risking listening to her play narrator.

    "It's her calling to make every husband on earth feel grateful they're not married to her."

    She is certainly succeeding thus far. I will not speak for others at this moment, but she can add my name to the list, I am very grateful!
    Thank you !

  9. Joes Kansas City Style Custom Bikini Line Shaves4/4/19, 7:20 PM

    still better than the conniving, bowtie wearing stooge

    True dat

  10. As bizarre as much of the Funkhouser years might have been, considering what the city has just been through and particularly what's coming down the road, what will those former years be known as?
    The good old days!

    1. Agreed!

      In hindsight, He might have won his re-election had we all known what would follow. Knowing what I know now, I admittedly would have worked on Gloria's..I mean, Mark's campaign. I still believe things would have been worse under a Mayor Alvin Brooks term.

  11. Don't you know when Byron sees this he will be so pissed he won't be able to see straight? Ohhhhhhhh silly me, that scammer can't see anything, he's blind.

    Do you think Byron and Gloria exchange Christmas cards? I could see Gloria doing that only because she knows he's blind and wouldn't be able to read them. Kind of like asking the blind person to climb into the crows nest and watch out for land.

  12. Gloria Squitiro was the Jolie Justus of her time.

    Look at that resemblance!

  13. Jesus Christ! When did we let the retards on here do book reviews?? Stupid Dave can’t even write a coherent comment, let alone a book review.

  14. ^^^^^^^You talking about yourself again?

  15. I'll pass Dave. You would have to re-read "The Stranger" by Camus, to prepare you for this no doubt, weighty tome, in order to understand how anyone, in this case, Funky, could get used to living with this lady.

    That said, 7:21 and 7:29 make good points.

  16. By the way - "The Side Effects Of Bravery"?????

    Was this ghost written by James Comey?

  17. The next book from the Funks, will be from Funky and Comey both a real opus Magnum - "A Higher Talling".

    Now, in retrospect, the only heights Comey achieved in life, were physical. He is the smallest 6'8" man we will ever read about.

    I'd skip his book too.

  18. Published by Gloria Squitiro Publishing. Ha. A vanity press all right. Save your money.

  19. Holy shit. She does look like Jolie!

    Never noticed that before. Thanks @8:32.

  20. 10:50:

    "Published by Gloria Squitiro Publishing. Ha. A vanity press all right."

    Please learn the difference between a vanity press and self-publishing. They are not the same.

  21. How's old Mammy doing?

  22. ^^^ Gloria's greatest hits?

  23. Other than the scandal with his wife* what was wrong with mayor Funkhauser? City would not be nearly as in debt as we are today if a mayor like Funkhauser instead of the hemorrhaging finances mayor James has bequeathed ...

    *Whoever heard of a scandal involving a married elected official where the scandal is he spends too much time with his wife? was just too bizarre. Why not leave the overbearing wife at home while you kick it at 12th & oak????


  24. Byron go fuck yourself and die. The Tony's comment trolls will be in line to piss on your grave.

  25. I wonder if she mentions Joe Miller.

  26. Byron Funkhouser4/6/19, 10:32 AM

    Wow, Mark Squitiro's friends are assholes.

    What a surprise.

    NastyDave, let me know when your boyfriend dies, so I can celebrate.


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