Sunday, February 24, 2019

KANSAS CITY OSCAR NIGHT 2019!!!



Just a quick check-in for tonight's Hollywood festivities enjoyed mostly by older women and more "flamboyant" friends . . .

Accordingly, TKC comment fave Chuck offers his 2-cents . . .

"The Protest/Resistance speeches given by virtue signalling, holier-than-thou "celebrities" who have ruined a once great venue and now threaten to ruin the entire entertainment industry, started that night. The "Culture War" elevated mediocre talent and the unexpected good fortune of those salt of the earth actors, for a few minutes, into a new celestial empyrius where the fires of their outrage were fungible and could be leveraged into their next contract.

While mentioning mediocrity, this would be a perfect moment to spoil the Oscars for you. Here goes. "Black Panther" will win BEST PICTURE. A garden variety, comic book film, that has ascended to apotheosis, by way of melanin and the shame of #Oscars So White. This is as good a year as any, for this pretender to walk off with the statue, the movies have been sub standard and there is no "Lawrence Of Arabia" to deny the rightful honor."

Chuck legit claims he's going to watching Matlock reruns.

But none of that is any fun.

AND SO WE SHARE OUR KANSAS CITY OSCAR PICKS TONIGHT!!!



Just a quick peek:

Best Actor: Mayor Sly James
Best Actress: Council Lady Jolie Justus
Best Screenplay: Kansas City Star
Best Special F/X: New Kansas City Single-Terminal Airport
Best Best Foreign Language Film: New Caravan Arrivals In Northeast KCMO
Best Costume Design: MAGA Hat Kid At Oak Park Mall
Lifetime Achievement: Kay Waldo Barnes

And the Kansas City Oscar for Best Picture goes to . . .



The Patrick Mahomes Ketchup Commercial

Honestly, he's the only real star in Kansas City and the guy who everybody wants to take a selfie with . . .

And so . .

PLEASE SUGGEST YOUR KANSAS CITY BEST CINEMATIC MOMENTS 2019!!!

Enjoy the show. Thanks for reading this week!!!

25 comments:

Anonymous said...

The downtown renaissance is the best show in town. Makes more money than everyone else too!

Garnish said...

You forgot best director.

Definitely Troy Schulte who should be city manager for another 5 years! Sorry haters. Back off.

Rates said...

So the viewership of the Academy awards is down. They should hire Visit KC, they can get 25-million annual visitors with a penstroke.

Your gay son loves you said...

The Oscars are far more interesting than the KC poop hole and all the angry old white men.

Sorry betches!

Anonymous said...

Chuck nailed it!!!

Thank you so sir for some reason and insight.

Anonymous said...

Chuckles is right, it was the white man that built the film industry and for what? So dames and groids could destroy it?

Anonymous said...

Looks like Chuck E. Cheese got deleted!!!!! Love it!!!!!!!

Anonymous said...

Spike Lee will win because he made a mediocre movie and he's black and they want to give the award to THE FIRST black director.

Byron Funkhouser said...

So, no more reality television stars for President?

Show me where it says in the constitution that the first amendment doesn't apply to celebrities.

Chuck has probably NOT seen all of the nominated movies, but he knows which one shouldn't have won. Surprise, Surprise, it's the one with the black super hero. No one could have seen that coming.

Anonymous said...

Lamar Hunt's Ketchup company. And Hunt fired player Hunt for domestic abuse. Hunt is everywhere in football!

Anonymous said...

KU professor won for Black KKKlansman. Sorry bitches.

Anonymous said...

....the envelopes please

Actress in a Supporting Role -- Alissia Canady for "Expired Plates"

Makeup and Hairstyling -- Mike Sanders for "Crooked Wig"

Costume Design -- Jussie Smollett for "Noose Around My Neck"

Documentary Feature -- Patrick Tuohey for "Truth About Incentives"

Sound Editing -- Rod Rosenstein for "I'll Wear A Wire"

Production Design -- Edgemoor for "Pretty Pictures"

Actor in a Supporting Role -- Scott Taylor in "Eastside"

Foreign-Language Film -- KC Public Schools in "Accreditation"

Animated Short -- Katheryn Shields

Visual Effects -- KCMO unplowed streets in "Forgotten"

Live Action Short Film -- KC Streetcar in "Winter Weather"

Adapted Screenplay -- Quinton Lucas in "Behind The Wheel"

Original Screenplay -- Robert Mueller in "Conspiracy"

Cinematography -- Sylvester James for "Swope Park Empty Spaces"

Original Score -- Burns and McDonnell HQ financed by KCMO taxpayers

Original Song -- 18th and Vine for "I'm Too Saxy"

Director -- Troy Schulte for "Armageddon"

Actor in a Leading Role -- Jason Kander in "Must Be PTSD"

Actress in a Leading Role -- Jolie Justus in "On Second Thought"

Best Picture -- KC Star Editorial Board in "Final Days"

Winner, Winner Chicken Dinner said...

^^^^^ And that is the only comment worth reading today on TKC. NICE WORK!

Anonymous said...

L
O
L

Anonymous said...

9:31 FTW!

Anonymous said...

Byron you haven't seen any of them . Blind remember?

Anonymous said...

KU guy big party for cowrite. Lick balls racists!

Anonymous said...

Hahahahaha!

Anonymous said...

Last year’s Oscars continued a 4-year downward trend reaching the lowest viewership since ratings began being recorded. While there is undoubtedly more than one reason for this, it has to be due in part to how contrived and predictable the event has become. In addition to celebrities thinking it’s necessary to spout their own political opinions, the awards have become best dramatic nonfiction material by presenting awards based on race just to appease critics. #oscarstoowhite reached a fever pitch last year and, presto, this year you have multiple black winners. Now that the blacks have strong-armed some trophies, I predict the gays and trans will begin #oscarstoostraight and there will need to be some homo/tranny winners in the next awards to make sure, like today’s kids, everyone gets a trophy to avoid hard feelings.

chuck said...

Two, not one, two Magnificent 7 movies were my salvation after golf as I descended into my cups.

Fuck the Panther and God Bless America!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Anonymous said...

The Oscar protections here were as off base as the political ones.

I'm still enjoying the Yoder wins by 8. An instant classic.

Anonymous said...

^^^ Sniffing farts late at night? Sorry. Chuck was on the money. Bully for him!

Anonymous said...

Best musical has not been mentioned.

Gopher boi blowing Slie's horn or something.

Hyperblogal said...

Best Fantasy Screenplay: Visit KC.

Anonymous said...

Chuck has made multiple racist posts. It’s one thing to have totally unmoderated comments and a racist sexist filthy post shows up now and then (or, more likely, every damn day); it’s another thing to profile a comment writer who routinely makes racist comments. Plus he is an ill mannered dunce. You can do better tony.
Thanks,
Radish