TKC EXCLUSIVE!!! ADVICE AND INSIGHT FOR ALWAYS ROWDY KANSAS CITY ST. PADDY'S DAY PARADE AND AFTER PARTY!!!
The Kansas City annual silly St. Patrick's Day drunken festival has finally arrived in the midst of a historic murder streak and more than anything locals want to keep crowds safe.
To wit . . .
CHECK OUT KICK-ASS TKC WORDS OF WISDOM AND WARNING AMID THE SOMETIMES DANGEROUS, ALWAYS ENTERTAINING AND OFTEN UNRULY KANSAS CITY ST. PADDY'S DAY PARTY!!!
Whilst most coverage of the event is confined to happy, advertiser friendly chatter . . . There's more important issues to confront.
For instance, check this KCPD St. Paddy's Day reminder about crowd control:
Police ask all parade attendees and St. Patrick’s Day revelers to protect their property by not leaving any items of value in plain view in their vehicles. Police also ask attendees not to leave unattended bags, backpacks, coolers or the like. Numerous officers will be patrolling the parade route and nearby areas. Police remind parade-goers that open-container ordinances remain in effect during the parade, and citations will be issued for open consumption of alcohol. Police also will conduct DUI saturation patrols on Saturday.
After the parade, police will dedicate numerous officers to provide extra security in entertainment districts throughout the city.
And now let's get even more real . . .
It seems the Kansas City is always in a dark mood nowadays when it comes to the divisive social scene.
And so, FEEL FREE TO SHARE YOUR BEST KANSAS CITY ST. PADDY'S DAY ADVICE IN THE COMMENTS but for now here's a quick bit of wisdom from insiders and pesky neighbors regarding all things Irish and otherwise . . .
First and foremost . . . A word of warning:
"Encourage your readers that they shouldn't let their 'Irish Pride' get in the way of discretion when it comes to inevitable confrontation during today's revelry. Suburbanites often don't know who they're dealing with when they visit local party spots and fighting with strangers in KC Proper is never a good idea. The illusion of safety is a very real it's easy to forget that places like Westport can get dangerous quickly - Don't forget that an off-duty cop was shot and killed there just months ago."
A word about local scholars . . .
"Just wondering if local news is gong to report the mini-riots that always happen on St. Patrick's Day. It's kind of a tradition but something that most TV stations try to downplay."
Finally, a social media note making the rounds featuring Midtown neighborhoods fed up with the KCMO St. Paddy's Party before it even starts . . .
- Don't throw your trash in people's lawns - there are plenty of trash cans around
- Don't pi$$$ on peoples property - there are hundreds of "porta-potties" for you to use
- Be courteous - If someone asks you to discontinue your current behavior, it's because you're being an asshole.
- But most importantly DON'T PARK IN THE RESIDENTIAL PARKING SPOTS AND LOTS It's hard enough to park around here without people taking spots
And so . . .
Take a look at the route and more traffic deets . . .
Here's a second round parade guide from police:
The Kansas City St. Patrick's Day Parade begins at 11 a.m. and lasts about three hours. The actual parade is on Broadway, beginning at Linwood and going south to 43rd Street. Broadway will be closed from 31st Street to 47th Street beginning at 9 a.m. Crossing Broadway is discouraged after that time. The parade staging area also will be closed prior to and during the parade, beginning at 8:15 a.m. This includes Linwood from Main to Pennsylvania and Broadway from 31 st Street to Linwood. All cars parked in any of these areas must be moved before 4 a.m. Saturday, March 17. The parade route and map of parking are on the parade’s web site. Broadway will reopen from north to south at the conclusion of the parade, around 2 p.m.
Additional KCATA buses will be available at 39 th and Broadway/Main to help ease pedestrian traffic at the end of the parade.
Accordingly . . .
The parade and after party isn't really about any patron saint but more of an exercise in how stupid locals can get when they're boozed up. Thankfully, the cold should dissuade more timid souls from clogging local streets or drinking too heavily.
Nevertheless, today we'll see the best and worst of Kansas City and a local economy that's increasingly reliant on partying above all else.
Good luck . . .
Advice?
ReplyDeleteStay in Leawood.
that is all.
already a traffic cluster near SW trafficway. I don't know how planning for this thing gets worse and worse every year.
DeleteTo your tipster who talks about pissing on KC lawns.
DeleteThe line about porta-potties is the biggest crock in KC! There are never enough facilities in Kcmo for parades or any other day or public event. I hope your lawn gets some nice showers and turns out nice and green.
That kind of resident is why I never feel sorry for midtowners when they complain about gentrification.
Leawood????? God no. I’m fucking too many married women from there. I’ll go To Westport instead. Someone has to fuck all those drunken MILF’s tonight!
DeleteJust wait for the streetcar to the Plaza, that will be the best parade addition KC could ever ask for! A real cause for celebration.
ReplyDelete^^^^ Um, no thanks.
DeleteOh no! A traffic cluster! Wha wha wha! Oh stay in Leawood?....ugh no thanks! It’s St. Paddy’s day! This holiday is not for the shut-ins who populate this wretched blog. It’s for the young and Young at heart! The majority of you complaining bastards need to draw the blinds and lock your days and pray to God that the fun & merriment passes you by. The rest of you party people-I’ll see you at Kelly’s!!!!! Let’s gooooooooooo!
ReplyDelete9:54, there won't be much fun & merriment if you're present. You would suck the fun right out of the room. Kindly stay at home and let your betters, i.e. nearly everybody else, have a good time.
ReplyDeletePort-a-potties are gross.
ReplyDeletePeeing on the side of a building is much more sanitary.
I will explain that to the officer if I get busted.
The fucking Kansas City Atheshit Coaltion should STFU about the St Patricks day parade.
ReplyDeleteThey got their 15 minutes of fame back in 2013.
Now go away Josh.
You need to STFU about the Kansas City Atheist Coalition.
ReplyDeleteYour obsession is annoying.
"""Kiss my ass Josh. You guys are annoying!
ReplyDeleteI'm not Josh, you annoying little dumbass.
ReplyDelete
ReplyDeleteadvice.
from a local blogger.
who uses ALL CAPS. frequently.
and who says "TOLD YOU SO." frequently.
right.
I'm not Irish & I don't drink.
ReplyDeleteHEY BLACK GUY DISCONTINUE YOUR BEHAVIOR! QUIT LIVING!
ReplyDelete^^STFU you racist pukes.
ReplyDelete1:14. Shut your pie hole Josh. We know who your are and we are sick of your little group. U all looked like fools with ur ignorant signs. People were laughing AT you, not With u. Give it up and finish ur pizza.
ReplyDelete2:39 only a puke like you would pull the race card, the whole white guilt thing is sooooooo 15 minutes ago, this is a new era now and your tactics no longer work, besides, when does telling the truth make it racist you fascist cow
ReplyDeleteVery good advice for the haters geezer stalkers, and pants shitters
ReplyDeleteBe courteous - If someone asks you to discontinue your current behavior, it's because you're being an asshole.
ReplyDelete^^^ dude obsessed with older mens bowel movements
is minsky's a prussian or polish establishment?
ReplyDeleteoh well, nevermind
ReplyDelete3:25 it’s his job, it’s the only thing he’s qualified for, cleaning up after the greatest generation! HAHAHAHA!
ReplyDeleteIt’s obvious he doesn’t have kids so he won’t have anyone to wipe his ass when he gets old! The dude is just a bitter fuck, nothing good comes from him.
It's St Patrick's Day. Be afraid. Be very afraid.
ReplyDeleteAnd everything sucks. Parking, litter, drunk drivers, vandalism, street cars, road construction, the Chiefs, the Royals, NCAA basketball, city hall, Jackson County, States of MO & KS, TIFs, taxes, Claire, Golden Ghetto, shooters, protesters, school kids, illegals, unions, the Star, Sly, "Antifa", the airport, the Plaza, hipsters...
Tony has turned full geezer. Check into a nursing home already.
I see that Mommy didn't let you out of the basement today.
ReplyDeleteShe went to get her Oxy prescription refilled.
You have time to rub one out and squirt it on your fat, hairy belly before she gets back.
She will be wasted by 8pm. Then you can watch Saturday night monkey porn and whack that 3 incher again.
I for one am getting sick and tired of the comments by the same 2 or 3 haters all the time in here. They add nothing to the comments other than hate and disrespectful trash talk.
ReplyDeleteCome on Tony start taking the damn trash out more often
Start with stupid Dave & chuck.
DeleteAgree 4:42. Especially the guy that always refers to crapping pants.
Delete^^^^^^^I agree
ReplyDeleteI'm sick and tired of all the trash talking on this blog. It's still better than the local trash news paper
ReplyDeleteParade was tame.
ReplyDeleteLess folks than normal maybe due to cold/windy.
Traffic not bad.
Saw the Mayor... heard some applause and some booing.. all par for the course.
Someone in the crowd said they saw a funny sign that said something along the lines of:
Oscar Nominated: Get Out (Greitens)
Oh well...
4:42 FTW
ReplyDeleteTake out the trash Tony
^^^ Start with 6:27.
ReplyDeleteI saw the mayor and told him to fix my damn sidewalk. A fine time. He was getting trolled all day. Sly didn't seem to care. Good on him!
Having a great time.
ReplyDeleteThe Irish men love to get loose and blow on St. Patrick's day.
^^^^^^There that kind of trash Tony.
ReplyDeleteYe should get yer own blog and run it whatever way ye might please. Tis TKC and jokin bout ye old blowski & tug jobs is part of the good times.
Deletewell i want a cupcake.
ReplyDeleteneed
ReplyDelete