Craig Glazer Considers Smartman

TKC Note: Tonight our pal considers an Internets commenter who was special to a few . . .

Rest in Peace Smartman

You can imagine my surprise this morning when I got a call from a friend informing me of the demise of an occasional Glazer nemesis, Smartman, who passed away at age 52.  The pal informed me that it was some type of blood poisoning that carried him off to his final reward in a completely unexpected manner. 

I am told that his real name was Marti Dolinar.  My pal told me that he had guessed right a year ago as to smartman’s identity, who had a couple decades ago been involved with helping to run the Uptown Theater with oldies groups like The Turtles.  His entertainment career ended long ago.  A blog story indicated that the author and Marti had a few run-ins in the past.  I had written just a couple days ago that I would no longer participate on that website.  However, with the death of one of the more high-profile commenters and who was one of the more notorious Glazer-haters and the fact that the article brought up our non-existent Westport brawl and featured a photo of me as well, I felt compelled to comment.Let me take this opportunity to go further on the website where I am a contributing writer and not just a guest.  To my knowledge, I have never met this man. 

I certainly did him no harm nor bore him any ill will prior to his written attacks on me for no apparent reason.  Let me say this before I go further, I am truly sorry that he died especially seeing as he passed at the relatively young age of fifty-two.  I am sure his family loved him and will miss him deeply.  I am sure he had friends who will also miss him.  Having said that, I didn’t know the man, but unless you are truly an evil person which I don’t believe I am, I would be the last person to cheer someone’s death.  So let me say right here that my deepest sympathy goes out to Marti, his family and all who knew him.Now, let’s cut to the chase.  I think it would be a safe guess that Mr. Dolinar the last several years was not living life on the ‘excitement plan’. 

Just an educated guess, but I think that Marti may have been quite the frustrated individual on several levels.  He represented a large cross-section of frustrated American men who feel that their life didn’t measure up to their youthful expectations of what they hoped it would become. 

Therefore, he, like most haters, enjoyed lashing out at people in the media whose lives seemed to be more; what’s a nice way to say this?, exciting, edgy, fast-paced, successful, and more fun. 

Let me be perfectly honest, you think I’m not slightly jealous towards the Tom Cruise’s and Tom Brady’s of the world?  We all are.  They seem to have everything:  fame, fortune, they look like Greek Gods, they can have any woman they want and they have hero worship from the entire country and around the world. 

HOWEVER, you won’t find me going on-line, or on the radio, or on the internet and putting these people down who have done far better  than me and far better than I ever will.  Sure, I’m envious, but I also admire them.  I try and look towards the good in mankind, even the members of the race who are controversial.  Yes, I even admire people like Charlie Sheen.  He’s a winner, duh. Smartman, as many other haters on these blogs, began to hate on me some time ago.  I couldn’t tell you why.  I did him no harm, nor do I know him.  So, yeah, I find it a little bit disgusting when people attack me personally to the extent they make up lies, repeat and exaggerate ugly gossip and exaggerate any negatives about me while they minimize the positives and my achievements.

Smartman, Marti, whichever you choose to use, decided several months ago to call me out with a seemingly serious threat.  In fact, he wrote it a couple of times, leaving it a couple of times, that he would meet me in front of the Beaumont and we would settle our differences like men.  On one occasion I replied, ‘Are you serious?  Because I will show up and you won’t be happy about it.’  He said he was serious, I said that we’d see each other at five in front of the Beaumont. Now, these are facts.  Marti knew exactly who I was, what I looked like, my size and shape and he could even have figured out my age with a little looking around.  I stood out in front of the Beaumont, alone, for fifty yards on either side of me the sidewalks were empty and the Beaumont stood behind me, closed , locked and empty.  My brother Jeff was across the street leaning against his car, watching only to make sure that I didn’t get jumped by more than one person. 

Bill Nigro, a Westport merchant leader, was in the area to protect the interests of Westport (in other words to make sure we didn’t destroy property or murder each other.) Let’s be fair.  I had no idea who smartman was at the time, what he looked like, how big he was or how old he was.  For all I know, he might have pulled up with a crew of supporters all armed with baseball bats.  Worse yet, for all I knew, they may have all had pistols and been very dangerous.  So I stood there alone, prepared to do battle just as I said I would, come what may.  Now where I come from,  the Heartland, as I assume do most of my readers, when a man is willing to risk life and limb against the unknown to stand up for himself  against great potential danger, that’s called bravery.  I don’t think there can be any argument about that. As it turned out, smartman wasn’t likely to be any sort of real threat, but I didn’t know that going in.  Furthermore, I don’t pretend to be on the level of a Tom Cruise, Tom Brady, Brad Pitt, or local hero George Brett, who I had planned on writing about todayuntil this tragic incident occurred.  I can tell you this, I have walked a mile in their shoes.  I know what a small amount of fame is, I certainly know what the limelight of media attention (both locally and nationally) is, and how bad it feels when people you are trying to please, entertain and amuse attack you for no real reason. 

Look, I understand the tremendous anger towards OJ Simpson, or an Aaron Hernandez.  I don’t even hate on all the athletes that are caught lying about the use of P.E.D.’s.  It’s hard to hate on them when most athletes use them in football, baseball, basketball and likely more. In conclusion, I take no joy whatsoever in Marti’s passing, but you kind of have to wonder what would have happened were our positions reversed and I had been the one to pass in my sleep leaving Marti and his fellow haters to comment on an article about my demise.  Look we are all on the same bus, nobody gets out alive.  Maybe we should use this as an example to try and treat each other a little better.  I have never made a vicious attack on anyone unless they attacked me first. Rest in Peace, Mr. Dolimar. This weekend at Stanford & Sons, catch Willie Barcena from ‘TheTonight Show with Jay Leno’ and Chelsea Lately.  He is one of Jay Leno’s favorite comics and right now, his one hour comedy special entitled ‘Let’s Be Honest…’ is available on Demand.  He is doing two shows Friday and Saturday and one show Sunday. 

Call (913)400-7500 or check out stanfordscomedyclub.com for tickets and more information.  Follow me on Twitter @KCKingofSting
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