Rather than let Claire McCaskill look horrible on her own . . . The easiest thing in the world to do by the way . . . The Republicans and stem cell research opponents have decided to embarrass themselves on Youtube like so many video bloggers who (mistakenly) think they're good looking enough to be in front of the camera.
By now, most of you (my fellow news junkies) have already seen the Republicans response to the Michael J. Fox video. After watching it a few times and seeing television reporters act like they're so super informed because they read the Drudge Report as well, I had one thought:
Michael J. Fox has Parkinson's and that's why he's fucked up, desperate and being taken advantage of by Claire's camp. What excuse do these people have for acting so embarrassingly naive on YouTube?
Here's the short (bus) list of the minor celebrity Republicans and anti-science flakes who decided to shill. It's sad really, I mean Fox was in Doc Hollywood and that movie rocked the balls. These folks are minor league by comparison:
Jim Caviezel: I think he actually breaks down some Aramaic in the beginning of this video. Here's the translation: "I'm doomed to be typecast for the rest of my career because of a drunk Nazi!"
Jeff Suppan: Doesn't realize that even a World Series pitcher can look stupid in retrospect. Anybody remember Bret Saberhagen? His ex-wife's lawyer can tell you how hard sports heroes fall.
Kurt Warner: If he's so smart then why is he stuck in Arizona?
Patricia Heaton: Actually, this is a good move for her. She rose to fame by being paid to be act like a bitch. If that kind of career has any future, it's with the Republican Party . . . My vote is for some hot lady on lady action with her and Coulter.
Mike Sweeney: Jesus, clone 8 more of him and the Royals still couldn't stop from losing 100 games a season. Whenever the Royals are on your side, you know you've got a hopeless, losing cause.
Finally, here's a few things to notice about the video if you haven't already:
I'm pretty sure that Jim Caviezel now actually thinks that he's Jesus. And that's too bad because the only Jewish celebrity I really like is Jerry Seinfeld. Note that Caviezel appears in what looks to be a church sculpture garden in the middle of the day instead of, ya know, making movies.
Also, the term "Republican celebrity" is an oxymoron.
Alex P. Keaton racked up nearly 3 more views than the anti-science response did.
Talent isn't completely against Stem Cell Research and really only needs the right lobbyist to "convince" him.
And when the hell did cloning become such a bad word? I want human clones! I figure that's the only way I'll ever get to feel Scarlett Johansson's big ol' breasticles without going to jail.
Hhow many clones would you be willing to create and butcher to save a friend from paralysis?
ReplyDeleteOne, two, three...more?
Whatever the number, we know you are advocating murder, its now just a question of how many you would murder.
"Fundies only imagine hell and the end of the world, scientists create it here on earth and make the end possible." (Emanuel Goldstein)
Damn, McCaskill gets Alex P. Keaton and the Republicans get some dude who appeared in a religious snuff film. Tough call. But I like the production values better on the Fox ads. At least the audio sounds like it wasn't recorded at the bottom of a filthy toilet down the hall.
ReplyDeleteSorry, got to call it for McCaskill and stem-cell research. Putting healthy actors and athletes, whose only ailment is crappy career moves, against a terminally ill guy isn't such a great move.
Oh, and what the hell ...
ReplyDeleteShorter goldstein's agent: "Science? What has science ever done for me? Computer off."
they want you to think this bill is about 'cloning' Rarely have I seen better FUD.
ReplyDeletealso... this are some rude tittys.
Interesting break down of everything :-). I think the Fox ad is going to backfire on McCaskill and I agree that it should've just been left at that. While I admire Caviezel (for more than just his role in The Passion) I think this was a poorly done ad. If I were to do one I would've emphasized different things.
ReplyDeleteyou know any identical twins? I got news for. They're human clones. It just happened to be a natural cloning that took place. But clones they are.
ReplyDeleteBut I'll tell you what stupidity really ticks me off. Opponents of stem cell research and human cloning conjure up these scary scenarios where entire human beings are grown in vats and then harvested for their body parts or turned into souless zombie-slaves.
BULLSHIT!
A stem cell is a "blank" cell. It's not a skin cell, or a liver cell, or a toenail cell. It hasn't been told what kind of cell to become yet.
The whole idea behind stem cell research is to see if we can learn how to take a stem cell and tell it to "become a liver", or "become a lung", or "become a brain cell", or hand, or eye, or breast, or whatever we tell it to be.
Right now, the best source of stem cells is embryonic stem cells. An embryo is a clump of 4-8 cells. Looks like a fucking soccer ball.
It's not a fetus. Doesn't have little hands and feet and a heartbeat. It doesn't smile or feel pain. It's an embryo. It's a clump of fucking cells.
In the course of basic research, we will discover how to take ANY cell from a person and "reboot it" into a stem cell. Then it will no longer be necessary to obtain them from embryos.
So imagine this. You're a woman and your doctor diagnoses you with breast cancer. You need a double mastectomy. Before the cancerous breasts are removed, they take a hair clipping, or scape a few skin cells, do a mouth swab, whatever. They reboot those cells into stem cells and they grow you some new breasts. Genetically identical to yours (except they take the opportunity to remove the genetic disposition towards cancer) so there is no possibility of rejection. No lifetime of anti-rejection drugs. No painful recinstructive surgery using implants. They are your very own real boobies. And they haven't suffered the ravages of gravity and nursing!
No babies had to be killed, no zombie-clones had to be butchered. Just brand new boobies!
It's practically an out-patient surgery! You go in with cancerous boobs, you leave with brand new, perky, cancer-free boobs grown from one of your own plucked hairs.
THAT is the goal! Not reproductive cloning (although I have absolutely no problem with that whatsoever...no different than identical twins), not slave labor, not identity theft, not spare parts orchards.
Actually, umbilical cords contain LOTS of stem cells.
I don't know why we don't already have a program in place that gives parents the option of cryogenically storing their child's umbilical cord as a future source of stem cells should they be needed when the science is mature. That should be an option universally covered by all insurance plans just for the promise of the money and lives it can save.
->It's not a fetus. Doesn't have little hands and feet and a heartbeat. It doesn't smile or feel pain. It's an embryo. It's a clump of fucking cells.<-
ReplyDeleteThere's no convincing you heretics about when and what life is. And how life should be taken care of.
I won't go on...we'll let the voters decide.
I'll make a brave decision. If this ammendment passes I'll leave the country. ;-)
Oh gee, I guess I'm not a celebrity so my 'standing up for something' doesn't count.
That rack is worth rubbing something on...
ReplyDeleteOnce again, religion is being used in a scientific debate, ans as Xo pointed out, some bad Sci-Fi plots. None of this information is being held in secret. Go read a scientific or medical journal. The facts that are known to date as well as working theories are listed. This is floating juat about as well as the soccer field inititiative in JOC because "Soccer keeps our kids safe."
ReplyDeleteHeath over at General Blather had it right. Those that vote against it should be put on a list, so in the unfortunate event they come down with an illness that can be cure, as a result of this research, can be cross referenced to a list that showed how they voted. If they voted NO, then they do not get the treatment. Would not want a hypocrite would we?
One of these days, both Kansas and Missouri are going to have to wake up and understand that without science, it would be a cold day today.
Damn I need coffee.... Sorry about that.
ReplyDelete