Thursday, November 23, 2017

TKC EXCLUSIVE!!! CELEBRATE KANSAS CITY TOP 5 POLITICAL TURKEYS OF 2017!!!



Today we honor our bloggy tradition of Lucy hotness and writing truth to power whilst calling out the biggest Kansas City political turkeys of 2017 on BOTH sides of the aisle.

To wit . . .

CELEBRATE THE 72ND ANNUAL TKC TOP 5 POLITICAL TURKEY ROAST!!!

There are familiar faces and new names on this list and we hope to inspire a bit more local and interesting conversation rather than pretending that debate over Prez Trump won't dominate the turkey day discourse among fractured and slightly opiod addicted families this year.

Let's get it started . . .

Jackson County Executive Frank White


Frank White is legendary Kansas City baseball player but a complete washout as an elected official. During the course of his short tenure a debate over a human rights crisis, transparency and hiring has created an EPIC rift with the Jackson County Legislature. Recently, Exec White offered hope that yet another study and a jail task force would help the situation . . . Accordingly, the Legislature rejected his olive branch citing cost concerns as an all out war at the courthouse continues just in time for budget season with sketchy property tax bills on the way.

Outgoing Kansas Guv Brownback


There is no one who can argue that the legacy of Kansas Guv Sam Brownback has been anything but THE MOST HISTORIC FAIL OF SUPPLY SIDE ECONOMIC THEORY in this history of the United States.

At least everybody who isn't on the Koch Bros. payroll realizes the impact of the Kansas disaster on a national level amid the current debate on GOP tax reform.

It's not that low taxes doesn't inspire more job creation among employers . . . But giving away the store to massive corporations represents the very worst instincts of BIG GOVERNMENT AND CRONY CAPITALISM paid for by the fading middle-class and small biz.

The aftermath is that the economic "border war" was ultimately lost by both sides and most newsies aren't objective enough to realize that this tax giveaway strategy is exactly the same kind of scheme that KCMO has employed via development freebies.

Kansas City Women's March Protesters


Stupid pink hats and clever posters were supposed to fundamentally change local Red State dominated politics after massive marches urging voters to #RESIST Prez Trump earlier this year.

What happened???

Nothing.

Kansas City Greater KC Women's Caucus backed progressives like Hillary Shields failed to resonate with voters.



Meanwhile, the local progress of the #MeToo movement is basically limited to Crystal Williams and her horrible friends complaining about TKC to anybody who will listen over several mixed beverages at Cafe Trio.



And then . . .

Kansas City Chiefs CB Marcus Peters


A local footballer has been protesting the national anthem for about two seasons but he still hasn't enjoyed even a single retweet from Prez Trump despite his hope to confront the Commander-In-Chief in a face-to-face debate.

Meanwhile, the Chiefs have lost 4 out of 5 games and fans are even more frustrated with the performance of the team than the nearly indecipherable politics of players who haven't been pressed by the local media on their silly protest against all of the privileges and cash they enjoy.

Deadly police shootings and the topic of racial disparity deserve serious consideration . . . Mean tweets by the Prez and symbolic spolight activism by otherwise greedy pro-athlete creeps is a poor substitute for real political discourse - Sadly, this awkward football slapfight is a disservice to both voters and fanboys alike.

Kansas City Old Money Dude Crosby Kemper III And The Show-Me Institute


A brilliant British voice-over documentary regarding the fate of the Kansas City airport didn't even register a blip on the radar of voters in a recent vote. The high-class public TV election strategy of Crosby Kemper III and his Show-Me Institute proved to be an absolute TURKEY that has been demonstrated as ineffective time and time again. We're hoping that Charlie Rose and allegations of his nude dude groping will guide old money, #METOO and VIEWERS LIKE YOU away from mistakenly thinking that KCPT is some kind of sanctuary away from the reality of nasty media life amid the age of the Internets.

These guys talk a great game, they're very smart and they have lots of great info . . . But they don't like getting their hands dirty and don't want to understand that winning elections in Kansas City proper takes payoffs, a ground-game and mean-spirited advertising. Debating in a TV studio or via the Internets has NEVER won a Kansas City election despite the salesmanship of social media consultants.

And so . . . Now City Hall has a sweet blank check whilst GOP TAX REFORM AGAINST PRIVATE ACTIVITY BONDS MEANS THAT KANSAS CITY IS A DAY LATE AND A DOLLAR SHORT IN BUILDING A NEW AIRPORT . . . SOOOOOO, TAXPAYERS WILL PAY FOR THIS BILLION DOLLAR DEBACLE DESPITE CITY HALL PROMISES!!! 



Accordingly . . .

WE INVITE OUR AWESOME TKC BLOG COMMUNITY TO PARTAKE IN THIS FESTIVAL OF KANSAS CITY POLITICAL TURKEYS AND CONTRIBUTE SUGGESTIONS TO THE LOCAL LIST!!!

Realizing that so many activists hate this holiday we still extend the spirit of gratitude that is far more genuine than the small-pox blankets that early colonists gave to the Native Americans.

Moreover . . .



HAPPY THANKSGIVING TO TKC READERS AND KANSAS CITY!!!

30 Comments:

Anonymous said...

Happy Thanksgiving TKC.

Fun stuff.

Don't call it turkey day - That's lame.

Greedo said...

Sly didn't make the list? Too bad.

I guess he's more of a lame duck than a turkey.

Anonymous said...

Better title: Hillary and her clones continue losing in 2017.

More Cowbell said...

You forgot KCK Mayor Mark Holland. The KCK firefighters kicked him out of office. Stick a fork in his career because it's done.

Anonymous said...

Lulz on Crosby's hat.

I like his style. He and Show-Me do EXCELLENT work in better informing KC voters, it's not their fault that everyone in this town is corrupt.

Anonymous said...

Absolutely maintain that the Go bond election and the airport vote were RIGGED. KC has always had a problem with voter fraud since time immemorial. People are naive if they don't think that it exists today.

chuck said...

Happy Thanksgiving Tony and everyone out there in TKC land.

Anonymous said...


Happy Thanksgiving Tony! Happy Thanksgiving Kansas City!

Anonymous said...

Taxpayers were always going to be on the hook for a new airport. Now it's just a different set of taxpayers. KC voted for it, KC can pay the cost.

Rigged KC said...

^^^ +100

Anonymous said...

Hillary 2020!

Keep the dream alive.

Anonymous said...

^^^^^^^Always has to be that one turkey

Super Dave said...

Wishing each and everyone of you the happiness of good friends, the joy of a wonderful family gathering, with joy and cheer of this holiday season. ...

Our best wishes that everyone enjoys a Happy Thanksgiving!

Anonymous said...

You forgot about the dumpster fire Chris Moreno. He got bitch slapped by the voters in Lee's Summit like none have ever seen. Hope that piece of shit spends the rest of his life remembering that and keeps selling internet roofing and stays the fuck out of politics.

Anonymous said...

Building the new airport was going to cost tax payers money anyway. All of us outside the city limits grasp how much KC loves to reach out and pick pockets and grabbing Federal funds is no different except tax payers from 50 states get sucked into one of the local Boss Hog schemes. The thousands spent locally on advertising stating that there would be no tax payer money involved was a fucking lie from the start. This just happens to be a case where the city's biggest con artist got caught with his britches drooping and now he is whining, crying and looking for someone else to blame for the flaky assed scheme. So again we will watch local libtards piss and moan about Trump and the government when the crooked sonzabitches should have laid out the TRUE plan to the public before ever asking for a vote.

Anonymous said...

The actual list of failed JaCo and KCMO politicos is way way longer then five.
And the list of actual elected officials in those two categories who try to and represent the local taxpayers and actually accomplish anything of note is very very short.
The carnival continues!

Anonymous said...

TOP PHOTO -- FOWL BEHAVIOR

Lucy gave me a double-take when I said the turkey wasn't the only one with a pop-up timer letting her know when it was ready!!!



HAPPY THANKSGIVING TO TKC AND READERS

Anonymous said...

going to thanksgiving dinner. Lord, please give the power to resist sitting between the vegetarians and talking about trump.

Anonymous said...

Since you "write" about politics all the time you're still the biggest turkey around Tony, same as last year.

Anonymous said...

Hi yo jason kander away!

Anonymous said...

Still Tony Botello, sorry. You lose again.

Gobble gobble, loser.

Anonymous said...

Goddamn Tony, as much as we try to convince the radical fems off your trail you blow shit up at the end of the year. One woman who took on Trumps medical plan got her husband wacked on their front door step. No doubt Johnson County women took down Trump. Just keep in mind it don't take many organizing to change things. One gun won't stop it.

Anonymous said...

Everyone having a FROSTY Thanksgiving?

Be thankful for our frosty and progressive city officials from ramming it up your frosty arse!

Anonymous said...

Perfect timing putting Frank White on top of this list. While he drags his feet taking care of the crisis in the jail, another guard has been brutally assaulted. Frank ought to give everyone in Jackson County an early Christmas gift. Resign.

Anonymous said...

"... the small-pox blankets that early colonists gave to the Native Americans...." It was the British Army, specifically General Jeffrey Amherst, not the colonists. The indians in question were allies of the French, with whom the British were at world war. If anybody contends that colonists did the same thing, post your source.

In time of war, especially during sieges, it was a common tactic to catapult the bodies of soldiers and civilians who had died of disease into the besieged fortress. The practice is recorded going back to ancient times.

Byron Funkhouser said...

6. TKC for still posting "girlie" pictures, at his age, because he doesn't respect women & doesn't want them to feel comfortable reading his blog. It's a manly blog just for manly men.

7. Fuck you, Chuckles & NaziDave, hypocrites.

Anonymous said...

^^^ Hope you're enjoying that turkey that everyone else paid for Byron. I bet it pairs well with government cheese. You fucking dipshit coward. Sorry you're such a lonely pathetic piece of human filth that you attempt to hijack every story and make it about you. This is the attention you want. Hope you enjoying you bum.

Anonymous said...

Jermaine Reed is my new mayor.

Sorry bitches!

Anonymous said...

If TKC is a manly site, wtf are you always on it you welfare-frauding, goat-shagging eunuch?

Anonymous said...

8. Byron Funkhouser, the left wing Fascist who stereotypes anyone who disagrees with him as sexist, racist, islamophobe, homophobe, etc., just like his messiahs Hillary and Obama. Fucking hypocrite.