Friday, January 03, 2014

SHOCK!!! CRAIG GLAZER PICKS THE KANSAS CITY CHIEFS TO LOSE PLAYOFF GAME!!!



TKC NOTE: Read a bold prediction from our pal Craig Glazer as he kicks off the comedy/football weekend . . .

Playoffs: Lookout for the Chiefs
And Your Comedy Weekend

There have only been a handful of good comedy ventriloquist acts over the last several decades. When I was a kid there was a guy named Paul Winchell and his puppets Knucklehead and Jerry, I believe. Later we had a young lady on Saturday mornings named Shari Lewis with her puppet Lambchop. Without a doubt, the biggest star who walks with puppets is a guy named Jeff Dunham and his favorite little guy, Peanut. Jeff worked at Stanford’s in Westport when his career was just beginning to catch fire. I remember thinking back to his price tag of twelve grand a weekend seeming to be outrageous at the time. Just over a year ago, Jeff Dunham performed at Sprint Center for a little over a hundred grand plus bonuses. Jeff became the nation’s top-selling comic over the last five years replacing Larry The Cable Guy as the top paid touring comic. Somewhere in the dark corners of puppet’s and ventriloquist emerged the characters Otto and George. This duo, human and puppet, gained a lot of attention on the East Coast over the last several years as the naughty version of Jeff Dunham and Peanut. They did big-time radio like Howard Stern and Opie and Anthony and television as well including a Showtime special. See them live tonight at Stanford’s at the Legends. Call (913)400-7500 or go online to stanfordscomedyclub.com for tickets and more information.

Next week, a real treat, Kira Soltanovich from ‘Girls Behaving Badly’ with Chelsea Handler and ‘The Phony Photo Booth’ Girl from The Tonight Show with Jay Leno will be at Stanford & Sons at the Legends. Kira did so well with Jay that he let her co-host several of his shows this past year and let her do stand up as well. Come see her next week at Stanford’s Thursday through Saturday.
Playoffs and Bowl Games

This past week the family of former Chiefs linebacker and murderer Jovan Belcher have filed a lawsuit against the Kansas City Chiefs for wrongful death. To sum it up in a nutshell, his immediate family led by his mother and their attorneys are after a payday. Their position is simply this: 1) Jovan suffered from concussions. The family maintains that the medical professionals with the Chiefs were aware of his lack of civility due to injuries sustained while playing for the Chiefs. 2) It was those injuries and pressure put upon Jovan by management including Scott Pioli that if he did not play well, he would lose his job.

First off, professional football is a dangerous game therefor NFL players are paid handsomely including Jovan. Everybody is threatened with losing their job if they don’t play well, because it’s a business. Most important a lot of players suffered injuries including concussions during their careers. Belcher is the only one I know of who got high on alcohol and drugs and went to his girlfriend’s home and emptied his handgun into her because she was bugging him. I think it’s pretty clear that the victims in this case are the girl he murdered and their child. I don’t think this falls into a category whereby Jovan’s mother and family receive money because their son went crazy and killed a defenseless girl. I do think the Chiefs SHOULD contribute money to the welfare of the infant girl and they should let the public know exactly what that amount is and that it be regulated so it benefits the child not her extended family. The Chiefs don’t need to go to a hearing to provide this relief. Jovan Belcher did a cowardly act, he murdered a defenseless young girl for no good reason with a firearm at point blank range. I see no defense for this action.

PLAYOFFS: Okay Chiefs fans, get mad at me now, because I think a win on the road at Indy is a steep climb, I want the Chiefs to win as much as you do, but a reality check says that just isn’t likely. ESPN said this morning that the Chiefs overall defense ranks 24th, but in the last eight games it’s even worse…they are dead last. Isn’t that strange with all 8 of those Pro-Bowlers and 5 of them on the defense? How can that be with half your defense Pro-Bowlers and you are the worst defense in football, I don’t get it. Either we have a defensive coaching problem, our players are over-rated or both. My personal opinion is it’s a bit of both. I think two of the most over-rated defenders in the NFL are Eric Berry and Brandon Flowers. I see Eric as a small linebacker not a big-time safety. I am sick of hearing about how great Brandon Flowers is, all I see on TV is a receiver in front of him headed towards an end-zone with a football and lots of separation all too often. The young cornerback, Cooper, was headed towards NFL defensive rookie of the year early in the season now he seems to be the goat…and I don’t mean Greatest of All Time. I have to question coaching when it comes to Cooper, I see his talent but I don’t see much defensive change when it comes to big plays versus him and our entire defensive backfield. I see far too many penalties, big ones, because our defenders don’t know where to be on too many plays. Again, either their coaching is poor or their talent is over-rated…and again I think it is a bit of both.

I have never seen such a bad group of NFL receivers make the Playoffs. The best is running back Jamaal Charles, the rest are below average or simply bad. Alex Smith is a good quarterback, but not a great quarterback, he’s ranked number 14 in the NFL. That makes him just above average. I think he’s better than that. Unfortunately when you think of the last ten or more Super Bowls, the quarterback’s names are Manning, Brady, Brees, Roethlisberger, and Rogers. The bottom line is this, if you don’t have an elite quarterback, the Super Bowl is likely not in your future. Alex is very good but he’s not elite. There are some guys on the way up named Collin and Cam and Russell. The Chiefs have too many holes to fill for the next season or two to be anything more than a playoff team. Yes, that’s better than being not in the playoffs and as you always tell me, ‘anything is possible’. Riddle me this, the local media in Kansas City is one of the only groups of media that doesn’t even mention the Super Bowl as an option for the local team, they simply focus on whether or not they can win a playoff game.

I think MU is more talented than OSU and will defeat them. I also think FSU is the nation’s most talented team and not Auburn.

College Picks:
MU (+2 ½) over OSU.
FSU (-7 ½) over Auburn.

Pro Picks:
Indy (+5) over KC teased with Green Bay (+9) over San Francisco.
San Diego (+13) over Bengals teased with Green Bay (+9) over San Francisco.
Follow me on Twitter @KCKingofSting.

42 Comments:

Anonymous said...

Glazier sucks dick

Byron Funkhouser said...

See what free speech has become?

Anonymous said...

I agree Chiefs lose another post season game. WE stink.

Randy/Leawood said...

8 PRO BOWLERS. Where? I see two, Poe and Charles.

Anonymous said...

Say Glazer why don't you move to one of your dream cities and get out of Looserville?

Craig Glazer is..the hemingway of the interwebs said...

I couldnt make it through the first 3 sentences. Even your ghost writer sucks chode...http://www.urbandictionary.com/define.php?term=Chode%201

Anonymous said...

Keep this in mind people. Glaze is making two bets on three games. He picks Green Bay (+9) over San Francisco twice. Dumb move. That one goes against him, he loses both bets on one game. Not very good risk management. As someone has pointed out, teases are sucker bets and Glaze was 1 for 8 in weeks 17, 16 and 12. I didn't cherry pick those weeks, just the first ones I found when I wanted to see what Glaze was talking about his 50 something to 30 something record. I will dig back and put up another several weeks this weekend. I expect more of the same.

Anonymous said...

The only thing Glazer can pick is his nose. Or Byron's ass. Byron loves it when Craig picks his ass.

Anonymous said...

Glazer, I bet your glass is half empty, I bet you are one miserable mother fucker - Asshole! And thats cool because we all have known since you started posting on here that you project the miseries of your own life through the messages you post on here. Stats are stats, but just because your stats prove to be true about you (as being a true dick head) doesnt have anything to do with the Chiefs, you better hope they lose or people on here are going to discredit your bullshit every time from here on out that you post...oh wait they already have, so never mind- Asshole!

Anonymous said...

This guy is like 50 and 30 pretty good, why put him down his numbers speak well of his picks?

Anonymous said...

Gambling is a sin. No kidding.

Anonymous said...

Byron scares me.Byron should scare you too.Byron is against free speech,(speech he doesn't like),their are a lot of Byron's in this country.

Anonymous said...

Byron is against free speech...except his.
Byron is for high taxes...you pay them so he can take them.
Byron is for jobs...for everyone except him.
Comrade Byron...supported by your tax dollars.

Anonymous said...

Hey Glazer you got MU right. Good call.

Anonymous said...

10:55 Nice! but Byron Needs a Binocular, or a free big TV from a Friend. Or he travlels the country to find a dumb/willing cohart for his and his "composer" wifes scam. You are a thief Byron!

Anonymous said...

Glazer. You luck out on that! Man up and admit it.

Anonymous said...

Nobody bets on or takes a tease. Well maybe somebody..
Glazer. Fancy Nancy!

Anonymous said...

ZZZZZzzzzzzz

Anonymous said...

Get

Lost.

Anonymous said...

Hey Byron! On the way to Denver stop and say hello!

Anonymous said...

I can't wait for the next tailgate murder spree.

Byron Funkhouser said...

Anon 2:07

That's the plan, if we can pull it off ...

Mrs. & I don't drive, but #2 son is game.

Chiefs Fan said...

Craig your take on Javon the 'killer' is on the nails. I'm sure he was troubled, no question. People who shoot a girlfriend that has their little one like that are NUTS.I don't think he deserves any reward for that killing. I do believe the Chiefs should take care of the baby and the mother to some extent. Out of kindness not for any legal reasons. Such a shame.

Merle Fink, Belton said...

Craig I wanted to request that you write more stories about things other than football and comedy. You used to write some hard hitting stuff on life and I really enjoyed all that. Thank you.

Anonymous said...

Is anyone really interested in the drivel that passes as information from this comedy.

Anonymous said...

Hey Craig and Tony, I am sick of your putdowns to our Chiefs. They will win today and prove you both wrong. Promise.

Anonymous said...

I just took a huge Glazer

Anonymous said...

Byron called his son a Shit Son

#2 son means a shit son stupid hates everyone in his family.

Anonymous said...

12:32, knowing Byron, it's probably right on. If you were the son of a lazy, welfare cheat, obsessed lunatic who is anti-American, anti free speech, anti-white, racist, etc., who is so worthless he expects the government to feed, clothe and entertain him, you'd probably hate your family too.

Byron Funkhouser said...

Damn, you boys are STUPID!

Anonymous said...

I just took a Glazer that looked like Alonzo and stunk worse than Byron.

Super Dave said...

Byron has no clue about life. He was born to a wealthy father and a hooker mother. Everyone knows Byron. Then he blew his money on drugs and booze. Now he moved away to avoid the pain. Creep.

Byron Funkhouser said...

Fake Super Dave is full of shit. Just makes shit up. Hell, you girls can't even read.

Anonymous said...

Good Gawd, 7:29 p.m. One for 8 on his teasers in just the three weeks you looked at? He's losing his ass, and so is everyone stupid enough to follow his advice.

Of course, this weekend, if he loses both bets on the Green Bay/SF game, and picks the other two games in his teases, he will claim to be two out of three, even though he lost both bets.



Anonymous said...

Well Byron you claim to be blind and can't read either but here you are posting away on everything you have read.

Anonymous said...

1:49 did you ever show what an idiot you are. If you can't really act like someone then don't even try.

Anonymous said...

Gambling is a sin.

Anonymous said...

Byron you are a fucking thief. Anytime I will pay for your next eye exam! I got a binocular for your ass!!!

Anonymous said...

Byron. PLEASEEE , stop bye and lets talk. Like men. Or as ms. You pick. Thief fuck.!

Anonymous said...

Glazer got it right.

Byron Funkhouser said...

Ms. 7:12

I can't stop by. I don't know what city you live in. I'm pretty sure its not Kansas City.

Of course, its hard to hook up with an anonymous pussy. Its not like you're a real person. You're just a stupid ghost. You have to call me names so I'll know which stupid ghost you are.

Anonymous said...

Think I will go take a Byron hope it don't stink like it does in here.