TKC QUESTION: DOES SHE DESERVE MERCY?!? DRUNKEN KANSAS CITY ROYALS FOUNTAIN LADY CONFESSION: "I DON'T REALLY REMEMBER IT"



It's official, now we FINALLY have a Kansas City First Lady. . .



Here's a round-up of the only story anybody really cares about today . . .

Fox4 scores the first interview of my future ex-wife . . . Woman cools off in fountain at Royals game, talks to FOX 4 after night in jail

KSHB: One Royals game attendee traded the seventh-inning stretch for a mid-game swim on Monday night.

KCTV5: Woman, 25, arrested after jumping into fountains at Kauffman Stadium



KMBC finds and even more sultry mug shot . . . Iowa woman arrested after dip in Kauffman Stadium fountain

Deadspin Again: Royals Fountain Lady Had A Hell Of A Night

The allegation of her offer to perform a sex act on the arresting officer isn't getting as much play as it should among Kansas City Media . . . And the nearly blackout drunk confession isn't as fun and cheeky as mainstream writing would like . . .

Nevertheless . . .

DEAD TREE MEDIA IS ADVOCATING STRICT AND SEVERE PUNISHMENT OF THIS DRUNKEN WHITE LADY BUT TKC READERS SEEM TO WANT TO GIVE THIS PARTY GIRL A PASS AND ENCOURAGE HER TO GET SOME HELP!!!

Making an example out of some drunk white lady doesn't really help do anything but confirm the waning influence of newspaper pundits . . .

25-year-old Jessica McCoy of Des Moines, Iowa is the closest we have to an icon in Kansas City right now . . . And FINALLY, we have found a bit of meaning in the otherwise pointless Kansas City Royals win streak.

Comments

  1. Drug court? That's how so many crack heads get their 1st, 2nd and 3rd pass.

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  2. Yep - she should get an attorney. The judge will probably sentence her to some AA meetings.

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  3. Normally you just see white women this drunk is at bachelorette parties in gay bars.

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  4. This is the kind of crime local law enforcement can actually solve. Go get 'em KCPD.

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  5. Glazer says she's about a 2.5.he said he wouldn't be interested AT ALL,"more super daves speed"he said.

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  6. Royals Roman Coliseum

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  7. Alright enough of this bitch it's over and she's finished. Next.

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  8. looks kinda of used up for 25 yrs old.

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  9. I think everyone talking shit should look at themselves and see if theyve ever done anything drunk and stupid before. Get over it shes a good person and just because its easy for people who doesnt know her to talk shit I think you all are ignorant glad that you all have NOTHING better to do then to talk shit about someone you dont know so fuckoff. Shes my family and wait untill someone in ur family messes up people will be talkin shit then to so growup!

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  10. Instead of sending her to AA, maybe they should send her down to triple A until she is ready for the majors.

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  11. If she would have been black, she would have been shot or sentenced to the death penalty.

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    1. Lol. And what if she was Asian? Or Pacific Islander? Or Native American? For christ fucking sakes get the duck over this "black" issue you whiny test.

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  12. Look at kansascity.com and one of the pics looks like she flashed them tiddies for the guys. Too bad not the broad kicked out of swimming pool. Those are some tiddies I would pay to see. Roberts Dairy.

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  13. Damn...that is a face that needs my cum all over it. Damn that bitch is slutty. I need to fuck her in the ass.

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  14. Maybe she's a Behavioral Health Case Manager visiting KC or something. Or an RN at a big hospital. Or a Life Coach?

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  15. Evening, 6:35. Hope you're having a good day. On that note, why don't you and that ignorant drunk fucking skank slink on back to Iowa? I don't care if she's part of your family. She was, and is, a public embarrassment. She lied about getting pushed into the fountain. She was drunk in public. She tried to escape from the police, and then she propositioned the officers who arrested her.

    I don't need to know her. Based on what I saw at the Royals game, I know all I need to.

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  16. That's insane and no way to treat a visitor, piling up all these charges. I think a night in jail and maybe a small fine for public drunkenness should be enough. Kansas City should be known as a fun place to go to!

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  17. Hi stupid cunt of a 740... why dont u go fuck urself she didnt proposition an officer oh wait but u wouldnt know because u werent there so take ur stupid fucking comments and shove them up ur vagina even if u are a man you sound like u have absolutely NONE to me:) have a nice day stupidfuck:)

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  18. She's represents the new normal in the United States of Amerika.

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  19. I will tell you right now Glazer would fuck it no doubt.

    Then he would run here doing a story about how he nailed her.

    Glazer not as picky as he may have you all thinking. I have been told he never turns down anything. Face it this gal isn't that bad looking and it do appear she likes to party.

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  20. what's the big deal, Iowa girl comes to KC, has a good time, commits a minor infraction, goes to jail, will pay a small fine for trespassing, and we are all left with a funny story. Who cares, move on to next story.

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  21. George Brett did a lot worse than that, in the day...I saw it!!!!

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  22. L A Little. Being drunk in public isn't a crime, so how could she be fined for something that is 100% legal?

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  23. DIP is certainly a crime, it's just not prosecuted very often. They give those violations all the time in Lawrence, Ks.

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  24. DON'T get her while she's young8/6/13, 10:03 PM

    Her drunk-ass eyes tell you everything you need to know. She's been rode hard and put up wet the majority of her life.

    She was wise enough to install an inner tube for flotation assistance. I'll give the attention seeking skank that.

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  25. White Power!

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  26. I'll fuck her in the ass

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  27. 9:30 Lawrence, KS.

    This incident occurred in Missouri. In Missouri there are ZERO laws against public intoxication. You can be as intoxicated as you want and cannot be charged with a crime. Now go climb back under your rock in Lawrence and speak about things you know something about.

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    1. Really? Why do I write that charge ?

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  28. She ain't got nuttin on this Fountain Chick

    http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v490/rld1361/Fountain_booty_cooldown.gif

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  29. Midtown Perv8/6/13, 11:44 PM

    I'd eat her ass and suck her toes!!!

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  30. she absolutely offered to give that Officer a blowjob and thank God she is being charged for it. It was only in front of about a dozen Witnesses.

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  31. She should get a porn deal in some Fluffy Girls magazine/web site to help cover her legal fees.

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  32. From the looks of the posts from her "family", this fat, little bitch has a long ole row to hoe. Stupid cunt could have gotten someone else hurt and what a great example for kids at the ballpark. Yes, she's a major league, stupid, little bladder, with a budding (if not full blown) drinking problem.

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  33. "In Missouri there are ZERO laws against public intoxication."

    WRONG! Completely WRONG! Entirely WRONG! And couldn't be more WRONG! Every city of any size in the entire state of Missouri -- including Kansas City -- has laws against public intoxication.

    That doesn't mean cops go out looking for every drunk they can find. But it is a nice little charge to stack on some dumbass who is doing something really stupid, like making a spectacle of herself in the stadium fountains, then propositioning a cop.

    Tony, I understand this is a "free speech" zone, but it gets really tiresome to hear dumbasses who have no idea what they are talking about shoot off their pieholes like they know everything, and still be completely wrong.

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  34. 7:31 is an uneducated idiot8/7/13, 8:37 AM

    7:31, go back to bed. YOU have no idea what you are talking about. I use my "free speech" to speak the truth. For you to rip into someone who is 100% correct and you are 100% WRONG makes you a fool.

    There is NOT ONE SINGLE jurisdiction in Missouri that has laws against public intoxication. They CAN'T have such laws. It is ILLEGAL for jurisdictions in Missouri to have laws against public intoxication.

    Missouri statute 67.305 states: "No county or municipality, except as provided in section 67.310, may adopt or enforce a law, rule or ordinance which authorizes or requires arrest or punishment for public intoxication or being a common or habitual drunkard or alcoholic. No county or municipality may interpret or apply any law or ordinance to circumvent the provisions of this section."

    That's your free education for the day 7:31. Now go crawl back under your rock.

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  35. 7:31 is an uneducated idiot8/7/13, 8:45 AM

    And to clarify: "No county or municipality may interpret or apply any law or ordinance to circumvent the provisions of this section"

    So don't go telling us there's a jurisdiction somewhere in BFE Missouri that makes public intoxication illegal. There is NONE.

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  36. Well, now that Yael Abouhalkah has officially come out to lick the Royal's backside in condemning this woman it's time to declare her a true Kansas City heroine. Next time, honey show off them dairy cannons.

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  37. 7:31 is an uneducated idiot8/7/13, 8:47 AM

    That statute has been law since at least 1978, so don't go saying that it must be a new law either.

    You idiot.

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  38. I think this might be the same crazy biotch who sewed my nuts in a pretzel pattern when I got my tubes cut.

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  39. 7:31 is an uneducated idiot8/7/13, 12:18 PM

    I notice that there are only cricket sounds coming from 7:31's corner. Seems reality has struck HIM directly in the pie hole. Not so lippy anymore are you? How's it feel to be proven COMPLETELY wrong in front of the world 7:31?

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  40. And here's section 67.310:

    Exceptions to freedom from arrest or punishment involving drunkenness or being under influence of alcohol.

    67.310. Nothing in section 67.305 shall be construed to affect any law, rule or ordinance against drunken driving, driving under the influence of alcohol or other similar offense involving the operation of a vehicle, aircraft, boat, machinery, firearms or other equipment, or regarding the sale, purchase, dispensing, possessing or use of alcoholic beverages at stated times and places or by a particular class of persons, nor shall section 67.305 prevent the apprehension, arrest, incarceration and prosecution of any person who commits any other crime while intoxicated or under the influence of alcohol.

    Can she be arrested for being drunk? No. Can she be arrested for committing a crime while drunk? Yes. And that's exactly what happened.

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  41. 1:53. We have been discussing "public intoxication". There is no such thing as "public intoxication" in Missouri. She was not charged for being intoxicated. She was charged for her other alleged crimes. Even though the smart ass 7:31 commenter had to interject his personal opinion, and express his obvious lack of knowledge on the subject, these comments have been in regards to being intoxicated in public in Missouri is legal no matter how intoxicated a person is. 7:31 was too stupid to know what he was talking about.

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  42. Hmm. Looks like there are some places you can get arrested for being drunk:

    http://www.moga.mo.gov/statutes/C500-599/5740000075.HTM

    Drunkenness or drinking in certain places prohibited--violation a misdemeanor.

    574.075. It shall be unlawful for any person in this state to enter any schoolhouse or church house in which there is an assemblage of people, met for a lawful purpose, or any courthouse, in a drunken or intoxicated and disorderly condition, or to drink or offer to drink any intoxicating liquors in the presence of such assembly of people, or in any courthouse within this state and any person or persons so doing shall be guilty of a misdemeanor; unless, however, the circuit court has by local rule authorized law library associations to conduct social events after business hours in any courthouse.

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  43. 5:58, what part of "public" intoxication doesn't make sense? These are specific "places".

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