Because Tony Gotta Eat Too!

To my surprise, as I was surfing the web last night I discovered that Jason Kottke had completely sold out and he's soon to start taking advertising on his page. Of course, it's in the most ghey method imaginable but I digress . . . The point is . . . I put a(n) (un)reasonable amount of time into this page and more than a few people read this dinky little blog so I feel that I deserve to cash in on their eyeballs as well. I could dress up that sentiment (but I won't) with talk of being a "content provider" and being "relevant" because when you type "Kansas City" and then something nasty or racist into a search engine this page comes up quite a bit. But the simple truth is: People read this blog who are interested in Kansas City, those people often click the links on this page for various news items and other stuff associated with Kansas City. So, if you put your ad on this page and it has something to do with KC then there is more than likely a chance that they might do the same for you . . . Or at the very least, a few of the several thousand individual users who visit this humble blog every week will know you exist.

Now, I don't really know what the Hell Web 2.0 is and you probably don't either but it's certainly not important, won't help you earn a dime and will not lead to a white woman showing you her panties. The only thing I'm certain of is that porn is the most profitable thing on the Net and everything else is simply corporate people, their acolytes and a bunch other geeks that I wouldn't trust to make my sandwich betting on the future.

So in that spirit, I'm (not so) proud to announce that I am accepting (begging) for advertising and I hope that local businesses will support one of the few news and opinion outlets in this town that isn't run by a major corporation based in a city far, far away.

And now here's the rub.

Here's the following things I won't do for your filthy ad money.

• Won't alter my content one bit.
• Won't tone down my predilection for photos of white women in various states of undress.
• Won't respect Italian culture/heritage or their significant contribution to American society and the world.
• Will not "back off" from insulting the looks, policies or haircut of INSERT THE NAME OF THE LOCAL POLITICO WHO YOU MISTAKENLY SUPPORT.
• Won't censor the comments.
  

Basically, I won't change anything about this blog. If you're worried about the content than you shouldn't advertise on this blog but then you might want to consider the fact that as many times as I've been noted as racy or "pornographic" I've never offered a way for my readers to make direct contact with prostitutes like The Pitch and I've never directly e-mailed my readers to sway their vote like The Star.

Rates? Low. I don't need tax problems and I know I'll never get rich from this page. For the time being . . . Here is the fee structure:

All of the ads will go on the sidebar above my favorite local blogs

125 x 125 IMU - (Square Button) $20 a month.

120 x 240 IMU - (Vertical Banner) $25 a month.

Text Links - $20 yearly.

My expectations? Few really. This blog doesn't get an amazing amount of traffic but it is very focused. And I'm always surprised who is reading it. I receive regular hits from just about every major company in this town along with every college. Devry people HOLLA! This blog will never warrant a demographics study but I'd guess that most of my readers are white, male, have enough money to own a computer and afford Internet access and are probably bored at work or in between looking at porn.

Payment method: E-mail me and we'll talk about it. Probably Paypal.

Ad format: .jpeg or .gif, if you need help I'm horrible with design (as you can see) so you should contact Smartboy Media.

So there you have it. Honestly, I think ad money might not only reinvigorate this site but also allow for some more "dynamic" content options. Meaning: I've been wanting to buy or take photos or more local skanks ladies.

Thanks for your time. We now return to your regularly scheduled ranting.