Abandon all hope

If you don't have money for a loft or condo, there are plenty of abandoned houses on the East Side that completely empty and awaiting tenants other than crack addicts and rats.

An estimated 5,000 vacant and deteriorating houses whose absentee owners can’t or won’t maintain them. While the problem has been dwarfed by the downtown’s resurgence, city officials say it is one of the biggest obstacles to the inner city’s revival.

If you were playing a Kansas City version of Monopoly these abandoned East Side houses are akin to the worthless blue lots after Go. The city is the only group dumb enough to make an investment in this area. Predictably, the only deposit in connection with the land East of Troost is not in a bank but rather a series of dead hookers deposited in the nearby vacant lots. So, nobody expects to make a killing on the East side unless, of course, they are talking about going out and actually killing someone.