Kangaroos Confronts Housing Crisis 2019

Like everybody else, the city college struggles to find students an affordable place to live whilst BIG BUCKS FROM FOREIGN INTERESTS further complicates the effort to garner local students - Which is the whole point of smaller, state-run higher ed institutions. Here's the bright side of this dilemma:

UMKC's plans for improving on-campus living in 2019

Some UMKC students have experienced housing hiccups throughout 2018, from Oak Place Apartments closing down in the spring to renovations at Oak Street Hall in the fall, but UMKC has a plan to improve on-campus housing facilities for 2019.

Comments

  1. I own rental properties around UMKC. I would never rent to someone from India. You can never get rid of the smell of curry seasoning.

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  2. UMKC has overextended himself as the univesity system is set up to shrink in the coming years.

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  3. The dorms are full of sex and drugs. They were when I was in school there in the 80's, and my nephew says it is even better than it was then.

    You saps are paying for those college pukes to get plenty of pussy and booze.


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    Replies
    1. UMKC chicks get fucked a lot, every chance they get. The fact that they are whores is good. The problem is they won’t shut up, they simply can’t stop talking, and the are all so fucking stupid.

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  4. ^^So? Who cares? You sound jealous bruh? Must suck being an old, busted, broken geezer. Go away chump.

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  5. This was a lot of fun to read.

    I enjoyed the spoof of proper grammar shown by the number of grammatical errors inserted in the piece, especially the number of singularity/plurality "goofs". Good stuff, one would almost believe this was written by students at a school incompetent to teach the English Language!

    And the parody of the National Political scene was brilliant, with the so-called "Director Of Communications" playing the role of Sarah Huckabee Sanders and having to explain away the Chancellor's outrageously inflated claims for the future!

    GREAT SATIRE, U-NEWS, KEEP UP THE GOOD WORK!

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