Tuesday, March 14, 2017

SHOCK!!! KANSAS CITY FEARS 'JASON' ROBBING PIZZA HUT WITH SILVER GUN!!!



Crime in Kansas City is spinning out of control amid the BLOODY 1st quarter of the year as fictional movie slasher Jason Voorhees has emerged to claim vengeance, pizza and cash.

To wit . . .

AMID A TRAGIC HOMICIDE SPIKE... KANSAS CITY NOW CONFRONTS JASON ON THE LOOSE WITH A SHINY NEW SILVER HANDGUN!!!

Check the deets from KCPD . . .

On March 2, 2017, just before 10 p.m., a black male suspect wearing a "Jason" style hockey mask, walked into the Pizza Hut located in the 5900 block of Wilson and robbed the store. The suspect was described as a black male, 5'08, 140-160lbs, with a black hoodie, and a silver handgun.

If anyone has information, please contact the TIPS hotline. 816-474-TIPS (8477)

And so, as KCMO attempts to dismiss fear of Jack The Ripper killing strippers . . . Now, to make matters worse, we've got "Jason" threatening local fatties and their beloved pizza fare.

Developing . . .

18 Comments:

Anonymous said...

Leawood never looks so good.

Greedo said...

KCMO is getting strange, ya'll. It's easy to laugh this off but when the criminals start getting weird, it's time to think about bringing back a little sanity to the city.

Anonymous said...

Really looking forward to seeing if the Joker emerges to rob a few KC corporations.

I guess the streetcar is kind of KC's Frankenstein.

Anonymous said...

Bwahahahahahahahahahahahahaha!


Was waiting for this post to show up.

Anonymous said...

All we need now is Freddy Krueger to show up in this crime infested shit hole.

Anonymous said...

Booger eating bloggy goodness!

Hyperblogal said...

Being the Wilson Road location he probably had to wait 20 minutes.

Anonymous said...

Was the same guy who killed Toni Anderson

Anonymous said...

Nothing a 45 couldn't take care of.

Buh Bye buddy, enjoy your trip!

Jacknowledge said...

KCMO is getting ducking crazy. WTF is happening when the criminals are running around in ridiculous costumes? I hope KC superman gets better soon and cleans up our streets.

Anonymous said...

Dat black dude runnin' round in the Zuperman Zuit zhould be cleanin diz zhit up!

Anonymous said...

does anyone know if the serial killer is only targeting girls who do the duck face?

jessica

Anonymous said...

Dad? That be you?

Anonymous said...

Black man

No surprise there.

Byrons brother in law maybe?

Anonymous said...

kc = camp crystal lake.

Présenter Citizen at Large said...

I live in Leawood and theirs non stop crime. They just know how to hide it...... It's also a police state!

Anonymous said...

Just a hungry AMISH BOYZ Who feel off his slim fast diet , in despair and needing carbs and thought that it was Halloween ?¿?¿

Anonymous said...

"BLACK MALE SUSPECT" kinda says it all....