Friday, September 16, 2016

KANSAS CITY WEEKLY POWER RANKINGS!!!



Tonight, Sara Jean Underwood hotness inspires this Kansas City ranking of the players and people who comprised our news week.

Take a look:

Mayor Sly Ranks As Kansas City's Biggest Political Loser This Week


The Mayor hurled insults about "doubling down on stupid" but it was all in vain as Missouri stand your ground SB656 gun bill veto was overturned an a decision that resonated across the nation as gun advocates lit up the KC honcho on twitter in order to disagree with his anti-gun rhetoric.

Missouri SecState Jason Kander And His Assault Rifle Gun Trick Might Have Backfired Among Progressives


The Missouri Secretary of state offered proof of his military training and a realization that he's just as qualified as Jack Black in Mars Attacks to earn a place in the Senate. To his credit, people who were going to vote for him are even more convinced even if Hillary supporters seem pretty apathetic in Kansas City overall.

Show-Me CCW Advocates WINNING!!!


Violence might beget violence but Internets tough guys claimed a major win this week by with the veto override of SB656 despite the fact that most of these dudes rarely leave their basement and confront crushing loneliness far more frequently than any real world attacker.

Kylr Yust Could Be Kansas City Media's Favorite Bad Boy


Lets not call him a "lady killer" just yet . . . But his description of the party life amid questions about missing females remind us that nice guys never have and never will interest women.

The White Lady Who Hates Walmart Defines A Recent Shawnee Shootout


Johnny Dare made this broad an Internets celebrity and her selfie reaction to a Shawnee shootout says more about the Kansas City metro than most of us would like to admit. Her candid statements might earn rebuke but at least she's honest about the fear and loathing she seems to confront on an hourly basis.

As always, this list has been compiled according to scientific TKC polling and market research data and it's a weekly comprehensive guide to local powerful people.

10 Comments:

Anonymous said...

Good for you for picking up the Jack Black reference.

Just like Hillary, I'm voting for Kander but I don't have to like it.

Anonymous said...

Mayor wants to replace Cleaver. Highly unlikely.

Anonymous said...

Does Sly James live in the district?

Anonymous said...

Turk 4 Congress. #replacecleaver

Byron Funkhouser said...

I'm the one who made the "Mars Attacks" comment in the thread about Kander, & I'm the one who explained the physiology of why women are attracted to 'bad boys' in the thread about Kylr Yustm, & I'm the one who made the comment about why the internet tough guys weren't out patrolling the streets in the John Sharp thread.

Good thing I don't usually use my real name anymore or you wouldn't have used any of these points, especially as they all came from the same person (Check the IP's, if you don't believe me.}

"I now know my name. I don't play by the rules of the game."

Anonymous said...

I'm the one who said we need to rid the city of black "people." I win.

Anonymous said...

Don't use shithouser's name. He is dead.

Tim said...

I'll take Sly over that clown Emanuel Cleaver any day of the week. WTF was that "won't stay throwed" fit at the DNC?

Anonymous said...

I'm voting for Pedro!

Anonymous said...

I thought she'd had her 15 minutes. Tony only posted this for Cum Guy.