Thursday, December 05, 2013

CRAIG GLAZER PICKS KANSAS CITY CHIEFS AND MIZZOU TIGERS TO STAY WINNING!!!



TKC Note: Insight into weekend plans and predictions from our pal Craig Glazer . . . Check it:

Hail to the Missouri Tigers
Comedy/Sports Weekend


This weekend at Stanford and Sons at the Legends, will be MTV/Mark Maron star, Ben Moore. We first met Ben when he co-starred with Saturday Night Live Stars Tim Meadows and Chris Kattan earlier this year here at the club. Moore’s career recently picked up steam with appearances on Mark Maron’s podcast and TV show as well as Chelsea Lately. Ben will replace Reno 911 star Carlos Alazraqui, a Stanford’s favorite who caught the flu bug and will have to move his appearance to this spring. Stanford’s on Broadway is sold out this weekend to Christmas shows, but next week will star Warner Brothers ‘Hype’ TV series star Steve Kramer, who will have just returned from his first successful tour in Europe with Pablo Francisco. Kramer co-starred on ‘Hype’ with voice-impersonator and celebrity Frank Calliendo and Michael ‘Chicken’ Roof. Kramer and the late Mr. Roof also starred on Spike TV’s ‘Raising the Roof’s’.

The big news is next weekend, Thursday through Saturday December 12th through the 14th, we were able to land what is arguably one of the greatest comedy stars of the last three decades in Louie Anderson. Louie is best known recently for his long run as the host of Family Feud and last year’s appearance where he stole the show on ‘Splash’. Louie of course, is best known for three decades of being a top notch stand up comic who has appeared on HBO and even had his own series ‘Louie’, not to be confused with Louie CK. Anderson first came to national attention in his feature role in the Eddie Murphy Movie ‘Coming to America’. What you may not know is that Louie’s early career began at Stanford & Sons where he opened for guys like Dave Naster and Elliott Threatt many times in the 1980’s. Louie has had a long time home in his own showroom in Las Vegas over the last five or six years. We have tried to get him to come back to KC for several years and finally talked him into it. Normally, you’d see Louie at a large theater like the Midland, so this will be a rare chance to see a comedy icon up close and personal. For tickets call (913)400-7500 or head to stanfordscomedyclub.com.

Football Weekend
Missouri Tigers on a roll

The big news this weekend is not the Chiefs but instead the Missouri Tigers. The Tigers have surprised everybody with their 11 and 1 record. We all know they are one good kick away from being undefeated. We also know the national press is looking at MU with a long eye since this is the first time in modern football history that they are true contenders for a national college football title. It’s pretty simple, MU must defeat Auburn Saturday that would make MU the SEC champion. That, in and of itself, would be Missouri’s greatest achievement in football ever. If Ohio State is defeated by Michigan State, a game that will come on after Missouri has played Auburn, than MU without argument would face Florida State University for the National Championship. Yes, Florida State will crush Duke, so they are in. Maybe just as important to FSU, James Winston; the young man who is their quarterback and should win a Heisman Trophy this year, has been cleared of all charges stemming from the bogus sexual assault case. How cool would it be to see MU face off against FSU?

Speaking of the Kansas City Chiefs, with their three straight losses and four games left to play, our Chiefs are pretty much locked in to the number 5 playoff spot. I know some people now think the Chiefs will lose all four remaining games, they won’t. While the record makes them look somewhat better than they really are, given the weakness of the AFC, they are still a potential top performer. When you look at their three losses, the Chiefs were definitely in 2 of the 3 games even with the horrible defense. The reason, they found their offense. If Alex Smith can continue to put up points as he has and the defense can at least play at an average level, the Chiefs could still be dangerous in the playoffs. The team needs to start positioning itself for the post season, getting healthy, staying healthy and getting their receivers as best they can to hang on to the football. Moreover, I think their defense has bottomed out and will improve from here forward. Let’s get right to the point, the Chiefs will defeat Washington Sunday and Missouri; a slight underdog to Auburn, will take down the War Eagles.

College
Missouri (+2) over Auburn.
Florida State (-28) over Duke.
Baylor (-8) over Texas teased with Central Florida (-4) over SMU.
OSU (-4) over Oklahoma teased with FSU (-22) over Duke.

Pros
KC Chiefs (-2 1/2) over Washington.
Baltimore (-1/2) over Minnesota teased with New England (-4) over Cleveland.
Footnote: We are ending the year on a strong run 47 wins to 28 losses.

Enjoy your weekend, follow me on Twitter @KCKingofSting.

32 Comments:

Anonymous said...

Let's make some money people.

Anonymous said...

Oh jezuz this again.

Anonymous said...

Louie Anderson is a worse fucking nobody than Glazer is

Anonymous said...

Anderson now does shit TV, oh wow like I so want to go see his gay ass. I bet Glazer is horny and wanted some good cock sucking this weekend.

Anonymous said...

47 wins to 28 losses

Your win chart is a perfect example of how you fuck people Glazer. You twist the facts trying to look good fuck you Jew boy. I hope Louie rips your ass raw this weekend.

Anonymous said...

I'm about ready to give up on Botello. Seriously.

xalti said...

Tony always says: "You'll be missed." Which means he really doesn't give a fudge whether you read or not. I know that for a fact.

As for Craig, I'll bet Tigers but not Chiefs. Think he has this one wrong.

Anonymous said...

7:29………………ewe are justjellus of me………………………………peepul liek mee are suck cess ful…………………ewe liv in a dump………………….were thrif stoor undurware……………..smoak cheep ciggarz…………………..ewe wish ewe hadd my folowerz………………i am the reesun peeple look at this sight…………………mi leeguns of folowerz…………….admit it………………ewe wihs ewe were mee…………………eye am allwayz wright………….ewe no it………………admit it…………………..eye amm youre idul…………….admit it an youl feal bettur……………………

Anonymous said...

TKC readers are clueless. Look back at Craig's calls and he basically called this season. Shame that you bums don't know good advice when you see it.

CG said...

While we are on it. Why not let me help you with your retirement!

Anonymous said...

Tony puffing Garbanzo is surely his nadir.

Anonymous said...

Tony's getting something out of this. Otherwise I doubt Glaze would be here.

Anonymous said...

He's paying Glazer to write.

Anonymous said...

Fuck with me Glazer and I thump your ass back in jail where it belongs

Anonymous said...

I think I'll go with Mr. Glazer on these predictions. He's been making me money so far this season.

Anonymous said...

KC Chiefs (-2 1/2) over Washington.

Big thumbs up.

Anonymous said...

Louie Anderson's the man!

Anonymous said...

Anderson made his network debut as a stand-up comedian on The Tonight Show on November 20, 1984

Anonymous said...

yes 7:57 so what your point? That was 29 fucking years ago and what has he done to make himself a somebody? Nothing not a goddamn thing just like that fucking Glazer. He's a gay fat fucker and stands for all things that Glazer hates about anyone of us who might be that way.

Anonymous said...

Since the fall of the American Empire gambling became good financial advice..

Anonymous said...

Actually, I'd like to see Amy Shumer up close and personal-

Louie -errr... not so much

(Shumer's coming in April - to Midland-unfortunately -
not the more intimate stanfords)

Anonymous said...

I keep forgetting who this Craig Glazer guy. The only time I hear about him is on this blog. Who is he again?

The Writing Coach said...

A paragraph is defined “a group of sentences or a single sentence that forms a unit,” but in reality, though, the unity and coherence of ideas among sentences is what constitutes a paragraph.

Let's analyze a Glazergraph. A Glazergraph is known as "a group of sloppily-constructed sentences strung together without much objective as to their relativity."

For example:

The big news this weekend is not the Chiefs but instead the Missouri Tigers. The Tigers have surprised everybody with their 11 and 1 record. We all know they are one good kick away from being undefeated. We also know the national press is looking at MU with a long eye since this is the first time in modern football history that they are true contenders for a national college football title. It’s pretty simple, MU must defeat Auburn Saturday that would make MU the SEC champion. That, in and of itself, would be Missouri’s greatest achievement in football ever. If Ohio State is defeated by Michigan State, a game that will come on after Missouri has played Auburn, than MU without argument would face Florida State University for the National Championship. Yes, Florida State will crush Duke, so they are in. Maybe just as important to FSU, James Winston; the young man who is their quarterback and should win a Heisman Trophy this year, has been cleared of all charges stemming from the bogus sexual assault case. How cool would it be to see MU face off against FSU?

So here we have a paragraph with THREE separate ideas:

- Missouri is good.
- Missouri has a slight chance to get to the National Championship, if certain things happen.
- James Winston was cleared of rape charges (the totally unrelated thought in this Glazergraph).

You could tighten this Glazergraph into a paragraph by deleting the following:

- "The big news this weekend is not the Chiefs but instead the Missouri Tigers." Let the reader judge what is important and what isn't.
- "We all know they are one good kick away from being undefeated." Yes we do know, SO WHY ARE YOU SAYING IT?
- "modern football history" could be shortened to "history" since a) we know we're talking about football and b) there is no such thing as "ancient football."
- "in and of itself, it’s pretty simple" - c'mon. That stuff is useless.
- " and be Missouri’s greatest achievement" - surely there must be a doctor or scientist that is Missouri's greatest achievement.
- " is defeated by" - beats.
- "a game that will come on after Missouri has played Auburn"...so what? What if it happens before? Or during? NOTHING.
- James Winston. That is TOTALLY unrelated to what happens to Missouri.

Here's the edited Glazergraph, converted to paragraph form and now readable:

The Missouri Tigers have surprised everybody going 11-1. The national press is looking at MU with a long eye, since this is the first time they are contenders for a national title. MU must defeat Auburn Saturday to be the SEC champion. If Michigan State beats Ohio State, then MU would face Florida State University for the National Championship, since Florida State will crush Duke. How cool would it be to see that?

EDITING, DUDE. TRY IT.

The Writing Coach said...

Also there are certain factual errors - Auburn's rally cry is 'War Eagles," they're known as the Tigers to the rest of the world - but The Writing Coach ain't got all friggin' day.

Black Barbie said...

Nice style 8:46 but with Glazer it's all about size. He has to have bigger everything else in his life since his dick is like n inch long.

Anonymous said...

They just won't stop old boy. Sorry. I think by now you must get a kick outta it. Congrats on getting Louie Anderson back, he is a giant in the biz no doubt. My wife is a huge fan of his and is going crazy wanting to go see him. We will try. I support KU but will pull for MU this one time, hey they are an area school.

Anonymous said...

Glazer, follow your picks. Good season. I used to bet regularly a few years ago, lost my butt. Learned my lesson, but I always check to see 'what if'

Anonymous said...

glaze...lets lookat your record!!!
You spoke of the chiefs being
losers..then they're winners..
and you jump on the bandwagon.
Then they win 9 straight and you
say they're great..then they lose
one game and they're bad (losing to Denver who really hadn't played
much of a schedule up to the
game at mile high) then they're losers...you change your mind
again and now they'll be okay...
flip flop...flip flop...you can
never make up your mind.
Same with the royals...first you
say they'll be bad...then they
do decent...come may they have
a tough month and you say they're
junk...then they turn it around after the all star break and you
jump on the bandwagon again with
your flip flop flip flop predictions.
Then theres mizzou...you start out
saying they can't compete and
agree
that mu is out of their league
in the sec. WRONG AGAIN...WRONG
AGAIN!!!!! They start off strong..lose #1 qb and yousay
their season is over...WRONG AGAIN! You slam the #2 ranked
city in the nation without setting
foot in it for years and slam it
despite the fact that it's probably one of the finest overall
towns in the Midwest. You slammed
Columbia and when I point out the
rankings and greatness of the
city you hide like a dog because
you're proven wrong again.
Now...you come out and say mu is
goiong to win. Well for the mu
fans who proved you wrong again
and again we don't need your
support. Worst of all you say
this is the first time they've
been true contenders for the
football championship...WRONG
WRONG WRONG WRONG WRONG WRONG..
remember
when they beat ku at arrowhead
at were rated #1 IN NOVEMBER 2007????....REMEMBER
THAT GLAZE...rated #1 with only
the big 12 championship game
against Oklahoma to play for
national title...WHERE WERE
YOU..... you
need to use facts before you
make these consistently wrong
statements..please do some
work...
Now mu faces the auburntigers in the
sec championship game and again
YOU JOIN THE BANDWAGON ...AFTER
THE REAL FANS HAVE ALREADY SEEN
THE STATS AND NUMBERS TO KNOW THAT
MU IS A VERY GOOD TEAM WITH TALENT
AND ABOUT TO COMPETE FULL BLOWN
IN THE SEC...and again you come
to the party late with your
predictions.
YOu reach60% on your picks with
your bets...but according to the
real handicappers that's not that
good based on your betting.
Truth is you're probably losing
'money right now even with a 60%
win per cent.

The fact remains that you claim
to be a smart bettor but your
mind changes sooner than the
odds do.
If you jtruly bet like you write
on tkc then you are the "perfect
sucker" for vegas...they'll love
you....but they won't comp you
a chair at the pool.
The best stat that comes out
recently is that TONYSKC
is kicking your former editor
HERNIAS A$$! hERNIA ONCE PRODULY
PROCLAMIMED THAT HIS SITE BEAT
TONYS IN VISITORS...BUT HERNIA
USED ALEXA AND RECENT NUMBERS SHOW
THAT SINCE YOU'VE JOINED
TKC YOU'VE MOVED THE NUMBER OF
READERS/VISITORS UP SUBSTANTIALLY
WITH YOUR COLUMN.
TONY IS KILLING KCC !
KCC is a worn out blog. He's writing about news that's weeks
old. We have been big followers
of hearnes for year but onecommentator there put it right
when he said it needs to be
updated with some fresh material.

He wrote about the pitch using
someone elses picture...BFD...BECAUSE THE PITCH
IS NOW THE TALK OF MAJOR TV AND
RADIO STATIONS WITH THEIR ARTICLE
ABOUT ONLINE PAY DAY LENDERS IN
KANSAS CITY. )
Tony is the new star on the
blog block! Hearne is dead media.
the cream riseS to the top and
the old/worn out media just
slowly fade away.
as always we love
you...you're the ultimate
entrerperenuer and we are wishing
you luck in your new club (while the haters wish you don't make it)..

Anonymous said...

OH...and what about the stupid
f**k saying louie Anderson is
old!!!!!
he's on major shows all the time..
leno etc.
what freaking idiot wrote that...
as far as they're concerned..
they're worse than hernia and
his old blog...filled with
misinformation...old news and
out of touch with what's happening in kcan d the world.

Anonymous said...

Wow this guy is on fire. Who said Louie is old. He was just on that reality show where they dive into the pools, funny. He's a big deal. MU is gonna win so is the Chiefs.

Anonymous said...

Louie Anderson is 60.

Don't know if that qualifies as "old" (probably not to a guy deep into self-denial like Glazer), but he's no spring chicken.

Anonymous said...

Louie Anderson is a big comedy star, period. Glazer's picks are posted he wins 2 to 1, very good, very good. I like it.