THE KANSAS CITY OVERNIGHT AND LOSING FAITH IN EVERYTHING FOR THE HOLIDAYS!!!



More than anything the Internets has killed my faith in humankind and revealed that women only participate in sex as a means to an end . . . At least when it comes to TKC (and every other dude who doesn't have as much game as Channing Tatum). Sniffle.

And while we're on the subject of losing faith . . .

Recently, the Internets informed me that my old school religion teacher from Miege kicked the bucket. Apparently, a great many people from TKC's old Catholic stomping ground have been praying for her online. Depending on whatever brand of superstition or wrongheaded philosophy readers feebly and mistakenly put faith in: The prayers worked in their own special way or didn't do any good. Whatever the case, she's dead.

Online and in the Miege community there has been an outpouring of support for the lady and that's very nice. People speak of how she was a living Saint, a hero and an inspiration. They're all correct.

However, I only remember arguing with the broad for four years.

- Long before Todd Akin, TKC's old school religion teacher spoke of a chemical women produced that thwarted most rapes turning to pregnancy - A bit of Catholic school propaganda that's more common than most would realize and right up there with the myth that "natural family planning" is something besides a bald-faced lie and is supported only (and unwittingly) by the principal of probability -TKC asked her to name the magical rape-induced lady chemical and was promptly sent to the Vice Principal's office.

- We studied the ground breaking and compassionate work of Cardinal Joseph Bernardin and I reminded our religion class that he was implicated and criticized for his role in an early Catholic Sex Scandal . . . And was promptly send to the Vice Principal's office.

- Basically I was kicked out of class a lot by this old school and now long gone religion teacher and the most notable and funny instance was a discussion about early Christian sex cults that a young TKC initiated.

And all of this is simply TKC's late night tribute (of sorts) to the passing of the beloved lady and a bit of a celebration that I found a rather gully picture of Jordan Carver praying for all of our sins. Also, this missive serves as a reminder that TKC is not only the last bastion of Kansas City Free Speech but also a refuge from cowtown holiday sentimentality that I'm convinced was devised to crush the souls of all those who don't participate in the winter solstice celebration of smiles.

Hopefully, we'll have more BREAKING/EXCLUSIVE NEWS for the morning along with local content, links, debate, discussion, discourse and of course all the hateration this corner of the Internets can muster . . . STAY TUNED!!!

Comments

  1. She was actually a wonderful woman and you are only mildly amusing TKC.

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  2. But did she crack knuckles with a ruler?

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  3. Real Talk, a nun actually did that and it's not as painful as it sounds. Then again, I kinda came in on the downward slide of the Catholic Church in the U.S.

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  4. My son's first grade teacher was Sister Mary Saltpeter.

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  5. In high school our religion teacher talked about not having sex until your wedding night. One of my classmates asked the teacher, a male lay teacher, if he had any idea how awkward that would be. I shouted out OF COURSE HE DOES. That got me a trip to the office and a weekend of scrubbing toilets. Gotta love those old school, high habit wearing nuns. They were all about fear. In grade school the principal had a closet in her office that was a waiting room for hell.

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  6. That was one of your best posts in a while. Tell it like it is and if people don't like it they can take a hike.

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  7. God bless ya Tony.

    The BVMs pefected corporal punishment. The Jesuits thought water boarding was for pre schoolers.

    Truth is, if we could put the paddles on all the dead Catholic teachers and "Turn 'em loose" in schools all over the country, this nation would be great again in 20 years.

    Great takes, enjoyed the heck out of them.

    Oh yeah, one time, the Jesuits lined up everyone in the freshman class, had us file by, one at a time, and slapped us in the face for previous night's desultory homework effort.

    DUCK!!!

    I had to go in the service in 69, bootcamp was a walk in the park.

    Seriously, I was completely unintimidated and actually did pretty well by way of my 'Military' Catholic training.

    Prayers for your teacher, hope she misses out on the purgatory rap and gets a pass into the show.

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  8. All this happens because a woman bit into an apple?

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  9. LOL. Nice one.

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