TKC EXCLUSIVE!!! EVEN MORE DETAILS ON HOW MAYOR FUNKY AND CO-MAYOR SQUITIRO PLAN TO RUIN X-MAS!!!

The season of consumerism is upon us and that means it's time for Mayor Funky and his wife Gloria Squitiro to make Baby Jesus cry with their political maneuvering for the holiday season.

All over Kansas City, awesome TKC TIPSTERS are saying that that the Mayor's wife and her feet are once again stinking up this Kansas City Holiday tradition. Funky interference and nasty political affiliations started with the inclusion of Chris Stigall which TKC TOOK APART FIRST!!!

To wit . . . I want to offer some facts and a bit of back and forth about the Mayor's X-Mas Tree Hot mess.

Will Gregory is Kansas City's most awesome PR dude and he recently graciously provided TKC readers with a bit of insight on what he's doing for The Mayor's Tree Effort.

Naturally, I have to poop all over that bit of holiday kindness.

For a change, I actually did some research and "flavored" his comments with a bit fact checking.

Will's comments will be first and TKC research will follow, sometimes in bold.

Will opens with, "Regardless of politics, this event has been a Kansas City tradition for 131 years. Our job is to see that it continues via increased exposure and participation. Per the following, I hope you'll agree that we are on the right track to a great event and in turn, increased support for local charities during the holiday season."

Charities

MO Heart, Salvation Army: It's not widely publicized, but in recent years the fund has helped needy families by donating Price Chopper gift cards. Last year $39,582 worth of cards were donated by the fund were sent out via MO Heart. If we do our job right - and so far so good - we will do the same or more, this year. And ideally, exponentially more next year.

I'm not a man to correct typos but it’s The Robert Mohart Center, not MO Heart! and The Salvation Army. Important fact, last year the Mayor's X-mas tree fund gave away $44,000 worth of cards.

Hooked On Books, Project Warmth, Toys For Tots: To cast a wider charitable net, so to speak, we have added additional charities to the giving mix. The Junior League's Hooked On Books, KC Star's Project Warmth and Toys For Tots will all be on hand the night of the event to accept donations to their respective charities. Say the catch phrase with me Tony - "a coat or a toy, a book or a buck." Any and all will be accepted at this year's event and in turn be distributed to help those in need.

TKC Response: That's cool and if I needed X-mas charity (even more desperately) I could use somebody to help out with my Chinese food bills . . . Still, that slogan sounds horribly condescending and like something Gloria Squitiro came up with . . . Smells like anyway.

Entertainment

Eric Stonestreet: We were able to get Eric Stonestreet who plays Cameron on ABC's Modern Family, to assist the Mayor in flipping the switch to light the Mayor's Christmas Tree. Eric is a KC area native and his show is the #1 show in the country on Wednesday nights and consistently Top 10 in weekly ratings.

TKC Response: Who? NO ONE knows this guy! Last year’s Rob Riggle was a great guest and had movie credits, SNL and The Daily Show with Jon Stewart under his belt. Additionally, he cracked on Mayor Funky throughout the night and that was funny.

Sponsors

In a short time, we've been able to add some important new support for this year's event and lay the groundwork for next year's event.

Lathrop & Gage: They have come on board as a sponsor for this year's event. They believe in the mission of the fund and have been great to work with.

TKC Response: Development lawyers abound at Lathrop & Gage, so it's not really a big sacrifice but more like a marketing ploy.

Power and Light: I know they get a bad rap from time to time, but the good folks at Kansas City Live have stepped up this year and agreed to donate all proceeds from cover charges on the night of the lighting ceremony to The Mayor's Christmas Tree Fund. It's a great way for folks to have a good time and donate to a good cause in the process and we are grateful for their help.

TKC Response: That's mighty white of them, but I think this deal is on a weekday night and nobody's gonna be there . . . And since the place is so badly in debt and running on City funding . . . That nearly qualifies as a tax credit.

Kansas City Star and INK magazine: In addition to some paid print advertising We got FREE advertising last year we will do with other local media, The Kansas City Star and INK magazine have agreed to partner with us on this year's event with generous in kind support. They've been great to work with.

KMBC 9: Because ABC is home to Modern Family, Channel 9 was an ideal fit for this year's event.

Price Chopper: Not only will they be discounting gift cards (see charities info below) but they have agreed to include event mentions in their advertising.

THEY DISCOUNTED THESE LAST YEAR AND THE YEAR BEFORE, TOO!!!

Mercedes Benz of Kansas City/smartcenter Kansas City: These guys really went above and beyond for us this year by donating not one but two year lease on a smartcar that will be raffled off to benefit the fund.

TKC Response: Last year a one year lease (not a smartcar) was paid for out of the fund. INCORRECT! The lease was paid for by a donation from KC Power & Light/Great Plains Energy, and it was for a car in which you have a decent chance of surviving a crash!

Tension Envelopes: These kind folks have donated the printing and valuable donation envelopes that will be distributed around the city.

While I think Will is great at what he does, I would be remiss if I didn't point out that he received the benefit of a NEW LOGO, NEW WEBSITE and NEW LOOK, all done LAST YEAR at COST by a great ad agency, Firefly Marketing.

MOST IMPORTANT TKC FACT: The gift cards had been mailed by this time last year, so that people would have them in plenty of time for December, and they were mailed in donated card holders and envelopes.

Also, The event had PRETTY GOOD MUSICAL TALENT by the School of Rock band and the KC Chorale. I hear they were okay. They also had fudge (hehe) and hot chocolate and other vendors, who donated their evening’s profits to the event. WHOM DO THEY HAVE??

Now to the sordid topic of coin, the big question here is . . . How much is Will getting paid? Will is a pro and he works for top dollar, he wears those cool kinda beat up looking outfits that are always in GQ and I'm sure are expensive so he must be bringing in some decent cash. It's important to remember that last event's organizers were not paid.

And a douche like Stigall wasn't wishing Merry X-mas only to the white people.