Tuesday, July 01, 2008

The big secret about Kansas City crime is that it also exists in the suburbs!!!



Time after time I've endured so many suburbanites telling me about how they "just feel safer" living miles upon miles from any person of color. Sadly, I often have to point out that this feeling is just their imagination, reinforced by media prejudices and willful ignorance of the not-so-insignificant number of misdeeds in the suburbs.

Here are just a few instances of crime from predominantly white areas with a couple of the occurrences of crime even committed by white people themselves . . . However, I want to make sure that a litany of suppositions about an entire race are not offered in this post . . . Except for the fact that white women make the best turkey sandwiches on the planet. That much can't be denied.

  • Olathe man accused of counterfeiting money

  • Leawood thieves steal thousands in electronics, sports memorabilia

  • Men Burst Into Woman's Hotel Room In OP . . . To be fair, the assailants spoke Spanish in this instance but then again so does Mary Sanchez and that says nothing about the veracity of her ethnicity.

  • Prairie Village Man Knocked Out by Robbers . . . Again, Latino suspects are wanted in this case as well because if folks are going to rob people when it comes to cheap labor they can't expect that the favor won't be returned.

    What can we learn from this list? First, distance from the urban core doesn't automatically make a person any safer and it's now acceptable for all bad guys in the movies to be Latinos just like that lesbian revenge movie by Jodie Foster. . . Which doesn't work out as bad for TKC as one would think . . . I rather enjoy the thought of lesbians acting out their disgruntled and discriminatory fantasies on me, which is why I go to Coffee Girls all of the time.
  • Anonymous Anonymous said...

    We may not be completely safe in the suburbs but we do know when we call 911 there will not be a busy signal and the police will show up in minutes not hours.

    7/01/2008 08:03:00 AM  
    Blogger jocosob said...

    It's rough out here in the JO.

    7/01/2008 10:02:00 AM  
    Anonymous K said...

    "...white women make the best turkey sandwiches on the planet."

    It's the Miracle Whip, dude. (All puns intended.)

    7/01/2008 02:20:00 PM  
    Anonymous Anonymous said...

    Yes, we are a lot safer away from the urban core. You listed a couple insignificant crimes, and the only one mentioned that could potentially have harmed another human being.. turns out he was mexican... figures.

    If crimes starts rising in the suburbia, its because the housing slump has allowed blacks and mexicans to move into white neighborhoods where they couldn't before. White people don't commit crimes against their neighbors like blacks and mexicans. That's why they houses are all barred up. Blacks have no respect for other people or their property.

    What I don't understand is that it is obvious that Tony hates white people, so why do you want to associate with them. Why do blacks and mexicans want to live in white neighborhoods? Why do you bitch when white people won't employee minorities. Start up your own business... hire all the minorities you want... but you wouldn't.... you would hire white people because they have something you don't... WORK ETHIC.

    7/01/2008 05:55:00 PM  
    Blogger thepaintman said...

    is the Westside consider as the suburban and downtown at the same time ?

    7/01/2008 10:02:00 PM  

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